Chapter 23. "The grill."

Hey, and welcome back to this little book about a weird point in my life way back in 2018!

Who invited you here!?

You should not thank them, this is a weird place, my friend, lol.

I hope you aren't new to this, but I suppose...

If you are reading this, you've probably dabbled in a bit of my other works, or at least a few other chapters from this book.

If that's the case, you're good lol

If you happen to be new around these parts, I have a single question:

Why subject yourself to such cringey stuff!?

Go read some of my poetry or something lol.

But seriously, thank you. 

For being here.

For being wherever you are.

For being YOU.

Thank you for existing.

Go read the entry already lol.

Enjoy.

-----

September 17th, 2018.

-----

Dear You.

My nails are pretty dirty lol.

Probably from the grill. 

Random, I know...

How have you been?

Good, I hope.

I am tired and sore as shit, but it's okay.

I helped a few friends move into their new place.

Needless to say, it took much longer than expected.

Ugh.

-Dad.

-----

-Hmm. My biological father bought me a grill as a housewarming gift back in 2018.

I taught myself to use it, and I think I became half decent lol.

He drove up to Milwaukee from his home down in Illinois, a trip that was made with his wife and my little sister.

It was a kind jester, but nothing more really.

My father had never been (and still isn't) a major part of my life, you know?

He was quite...absentee when I was a kid, and even now in my adulthood, he chooses simply not to interact with me unless I reach out first.

Hey, such is life, you know?

Had we been meant for a deeper connection, the Universe would have blessed us with it.

I hope that I get the chance to be everything that my father wasn't someday, you know?

There are far too many men on this planet with children who are deadbeats, while men like me simply have no children.

It is a sad fact...

-I remember helping this friend move. It was quite a long day, and no one else showed up to help.

The irony of it?

Years later, that same friend would be the only one to show up for me on the day that I was moving out of my place and leaving my ex-fiancé for the last time back in 2022.

On the day when my life was officially crumbling away into something both more and less. 

Wild...

True friends are so unnecessarily rare, you know?

Keep those few people close, they are what life is about.

Thank you all for hanging around for this long, and for keeping up with this series and much of my other works. 

You all keep me going, lbvs.

I know I say that a lot, but I have to...

You all mean the world to me, and seeing you return to read what I post just keeps my heart beating in a weird way.

No pressure!

LMAO!

I will see you all back here soon enough, yeah?

Monday or Tuesday, my word.

Keep an eye out!

I love you all!

Consensually, of course.

Safe travels, folks.

And as always:

Stay safe.

Stay healthy.

Stay vigilant.

-Redd.

P.S.

If you are out there, Kid, and you happen to be reading this, find me on Instagram and Facebook.

@blackguyinnabowtie on Instagram

and

Terance Redd Ivy on Facebook.

Maybe, just maybe, we will meet someday...

Maybe you still have yet to be born.

Such is life, either way, yeah?

-Redd.