12 A shadow

My father ended up just introducing me to several of his associates whom I had apparently not had the chance to meet before. I ended up spending the remainder of my night by his side. (I was resisting the urge to set him on fire the whole time). 

Finally we returned home. Getting out of the fineries and away from the constant attention never stops being an immense relief. 

I have ended up sitting on a rather comfortable chair on my bedroom's balcony, unable to sleep. The interactions I had tonight were worrying. They had all been incredibly pleasant. It felt so very strange. 

Perhaps, this was a life where I am meant to start as some kind of friend to the male leads before 'betraying' them, leading to them realizing that their one true love was Eve all along. It had happened before, though it had been a while since last I had attempted the route of befriending them. Only so many times somebody can kill you before pretending to be their friend becomes difficult.

What if there really was something wrong, something different this time. No, that's stupid.It would be ridiculous to think that after dozens of lives this one in particular would turn out differently for no apparent reason. I'm clearly making something out of nothing. But what if?

Deciding that clearly trying to think things through was only leading me in circles I decided I would practice some of my magic. The life just before this had magic as well, though my magic last time was shadow based rather than fire. 

I feel the sparks lighting at my fingertips before a small flame begins to dance from the tip of one finger to the next. I might have been a little out of practice but between this bodies own muscle memory from having lived its whole life with this power, and my own experience with magic in other lives it was not too difficult to bend to my will.

The flames really are rather beautiful. Giving in to an impulse of childish whimsy I stream the fire around me like a dancing ribbon of flame. A small smile sitting on my lips, here away from judging eyes I am allowed a little bit of simple joy in the beauty of magic and the dancing colors of the flame. You have to take the joy where you can find it, even if its in the tiny inconsequential things. 

The feeling of channeling magic is something between happiness and adrenaline. Somehow both physical and spiritual simultaneously. My own feels like the warmth of a campfire, when you step just a little too close and can feel it scorching your skin.

To end my little dance I through the flame up into the air as a small fireball, which dissipates a couple of feet above my head. However, as I'm looking up I catch a glint of metal reflecting the firelight out of the corner of my eye. Joy instantly gone and wariness setting in, I turn my head. However, there is nothing there. Even as I conjure another fireball to scan my surroundings I see nothing. 

I have lived too long to begin doubting my instincts now, though. So cautiously I return inside, closing and locking the balcony doors, then drawing the curtains shut. 

Who would have reason to come looking so soon? Why? Nothing much had really happened at the ball, I suppose I made Eve cry but most of the protagonists have not truly met her yet. I mean I cannot really do anything about it, nor is it the first time I've been stalked. Surely this is a bit early to send people to stalk me though. 

Which of them even would? Perhaps Faryll because I had been interesting? No, that really isn't like him, he'd just 'coincidentally' run into me rather than stalking. Plus he can probably make himself invisible. The Prince? Seems unlikely he often takes longer to fall and likely wouldn't be obsessed with Eve yet. Maybe Parth? Or-

Then I remember the one main character I hadn't seen so far. Tragic Backstory, with the awful past and the edgy personality who is always some sort of assassin or spy or some such.

I suppose it makes a certain level of sense, I had met every other main character tonight, perhaps the narrative did not want to leave him out. However, he serves the prince, or at least usually does. Which means he had to have been sent here by the prince. What would the prince want with me? Or did mister darkness think that after I danced with the prince I might be some kind of threat and had come to scope me out?

Ah, he had seen my embarrassing little display with the fire hadn't he. I want to bury myself in a hole and never come out. At least he is normally very quiet so maybe he won't bring it up. Ugh, now I've got something new to add to the list of things I'm overthinking.

Deciding it's a lost cause I make my way to my bed and flop on top of the sinfully soft mattress. Hugging a pillow I turn away from the window and just do my best to make my brain stop thinking.

It doesn't really work but eventually it runs itself in so many circles it tires itself out and I finally drift off to sleep.

---

I wake up the next morning to Anne knocking on my bedroom door and turn and stretch. Glancing out the open balcony door to find the sun just finishing rising, some smudges of oranges and reds still staining the horizon. 

Hmmm, there's something odd about that. However, before I can really wake up enough to contemplate it. Anne is ushering me out of bed and the thought is lost.