Connected Shadows

Beaten by iron and driven away by shadows, evil energies within him fade. Regret so great, it has no container, devouring the world and itself.

It was the first time in over 25 years that he saw his daughter again. The woman with the child, whom he saw again in the parking lot in front of this school, was truly his daughter, he could feel it. She didn't look the same as he remembered her, but the outside was just a facade. Since when could she produce smoke, and how old was her child?

He asked himself many questions about his daughter, but one question he didn't ask, because he already knew the answer. Would she forgive him for what he had done? That was impossible because he felt her anger from earlier strongly enough, and by now, he also knew that her anger and hatred were justified. He had heard just a few days earlier about the possible casting of a Seika for a play at a certain school in a certain village.

No matter how small the chance was that it really was her, he had to check. He wanted to apologize for being such a bad father to her. He hadn't even noticed what he had become. Drinking constantly was just something he did to suppress something. He couldn't handle the pressure, now also having to look after a small child.

Everything in his life had gone wrong, and he had gone down the wrong path. He had lost everything, but the more he wanted to forget it, the more he lost, until finally, even his wife disappeared. His wife wanted to sue him and get away from him. That only made him angrier, and he became even worse to his daughter.

He wanted to write his daughter a farewell letter, explaining his situation and at least apologizing through the written words. But despite everything, he would never know what her response would have been, because now he didn't even know her new name. She had made it clear to him that she was no longer Seika, and therefore no longer his daughter.

"Seika, or whatever you are called today, I wanted to write to you because I now understand. After many years, I understand that I truly was the monster that you and your mother saw in me.

I know it's too late for any apologies, but I want to do it anyway, so I don't die in regret. Here is my first and last letter to you. I want to apologize for wanting to kill you before you were even born.

Your mother was against the abortion because she was already too far along in the pregnancy. But even then, she probably would never have aborted you because she loved you even before you were born. I'm sorry that I even hit your mother for trying to prevent it with all her might. I'm sorry that I wanted to drown you when you were still a baby because it became too much for me. I was never, and at no time, ready to be a father.

My countless attempts to rid you from my life ultimately led to exactly this. I started drinking and saw you only as an annoying burden. I didn't want it, no, I didn't want to be a father. And I wasn't one, but you were always my daughter, though I didn't recognize that. I didn't think it through. Back then, I just met a beautiful woman in a bar, and one thing led to another, and eventually, she became my wife and your mother.

From that point on, I never thought about the consequences; I never learned to. I don't want to justify myself with excuses, but that's how it went. All the hits you ever received from me were only because I was so dissatisfied with myself. I know it now, but unfortunately, it's already too late, and sadly, you will probably never forgive me. My liver no longer works properly, and my kidneys are failing more and more. My heart doesn't pump enough blood anymore, and my lungs are too weak from all the smoking.

Even though you probably don't care about any of this, Seika, I still want to tell you. I did so many things wrong, and you did the right thing, I saw it. You ran away from home, and you have a son, and he seemed happy. From that moment on, I understood that the happiness I had forced on you wasn't real happiness. How could I have been so stupid?

I wish you a good life, one where you don't have to suffer, my little one. But I can't bear this pain anymore. The pain of my organs, the worldly pressure, but also the clarity that I am a dreadful monster. I'm sorry that you never had a real father. I was and will probably forever remain a monster."

He cut his finger and let three drops of blood fall onto the bottom right corner of the letter, then pressed it with his thumb to form a blood seal.

He went to the kitchen to his medicine cabinet and took something from there. He took all the pills at once and choked on them before he could swallow them. Less than 30 seconds later, he fell to the floor gasping for air, but he didn't have the strength to do so, neither to swallow, stand up, nor do anything that would save him from this situation. This was not how he had imagined his end.

The letter was never sent, and Kiyomi never received it. Her father knew neither her first name nor last name, nor where she lived now, so any attempt would have been futile. But he wanted to rid himself of it from his soul. The life he regretted.

2.

Ferruccio had spent weeks thinking about what he could give Seika for her 25th birthday. It had to be something special, something that reflected their relationship and everything they had been through. He had researched in books and forums, asked colleagues, and finally found a flower that immediately reminded him of Seika. A red flower whose colors changed depending on the touch—almost as if it were influenced by the aura of the one who touched it.

On the day of her birthday, he gave her the gift. The package was wrapped in red paper, decorated with an elegant bow. Ferruccio kneeled before her, which startled Seika for a moment.

"Ferruccio, I... I'm not ready yet..." she stammered, her cheeks turning slightly red, before he interrupted her.

"Just open it," he said with a smile. "I'm sure you'll like it."

Hesitantly, she took the gift and untied the bow. When she lifted the lid, she looked at a flower encased in glass. It was a red dahlia with a white stem, its center showing alternating black and white patterns depending on who touched it.

"A... red dahlia?" Seika asked as she examined the flower more closely.

"I don't know its name," Ferruccio admitted. "But it reminded me of you. The colors—red, black, and white—are like your aura. And it's as beautiful as you are."

Seika's face turned even redder as she looked at the flower. "You always manage to…," she murmured.

"What have I done now?" Ferruccio asked, uncertain.

"My mother used to say that to me when I was still a child," she explained. "This flower... it always had a special meaning for us."

"I'm glad," Ferruccio said, relieved. "And do you know what the best part is? This flower doesn't age in this glass. Even if the glass should break, it will burn itself like a phoenix and bloom again from its own ashes."

Seika shook her head and laughed softly. "You're incredible."

"I just wanted you to have something that reminds you that there's always a new beginning," he explained. "No matter how hard it gets."

Suddenly, Seika hugged him so tightly that he almost lost his balance. "Thank you, Ferruccio."

"Did you get any gifts from your girls?" he asked after a while.

"That's not important," Seika replied, letting him go. "Now I'm with you, not with them."

Ferruccio smiled. "When I see you smile like that, I could fall in love with you all over again..."

Seika jumped back as though he had burned her. "You... what? You're in love with me? Help!""What's that supposed to mean?" Ferruccio asked, laughing. "Why are you blushing so much?"

"Why are you just saying that?" Seika protested. "This is the first time you've said it."

"My thoughts probably weren't loud enough…" he replied with a mischievous grin.

They spent the rest of the day together, undisturbed by anyone. They were simply happy.

But after Ferruccio's vacation, the challenge began: keeping their relationship a secret. They continued to communicate through the police device, met in secret, and managed to hide their love from the world for almost a year. But the more time passed, the stronger their connection became, and Seika felt increasingly ready to leave her past behind.

Finally, after three years of being together, she told Ferruccio more about her dark memories—about her father, her gang, and the things she had experienced. It was a difficult step, but she knew she could trust him. Her pregnancy gave her the final push to leave the gang. But when she returned to say goodbye, everything took a different turn.

Three young gang members, who could not accept Seika's decision, waited for the right moment. While Seika was in the common room, they approached her.

"Traitor!" one of the girls hissed and suddenly kicked her in the stomach. Seika gasped and tried to defend herself, but the girls kept attacking her.

With her last strength, Seika used her magic. She grabbed one of the girls, set her clothes on fire, and broke another's knee joint with a precise strike. Mio rushed in and chased the girls away, but the damage had already been done. A few days later, the terrible news came: her unborn child hadn't survived.

It was Ferruccio who pulled her out of her despair. "Let Seika die," he said gently. "Let everything that has hurt you die. And start anew."

Seika followed his suggestion. They staged her death and moved to a remote village, where she began a new life as Kiyomi. Before the move, Seika burned her name on a piece of paper and said goodbye to her past.

A year later, she held her son in her arms. His name was Akio, her "light," who had led her out of the darkness.

"He's our new beginning," Ferruccio said quietly.

"Yes," whispered Kiyomi. "He is our light."