Shattered

Time is a cruel, merciless bitch.

One moment, it moves at a comforting pace, carrying you forward like a gentle tide. Then, without warning, it shifts—propelling you into the unknown, forcing you to face changes you never saw coming.

High school had been a battlefield, but at least in those years, Sinister had been mine. He was intense, possessive, and fucked up in all the ways that made me feel wanted, made me feel like I was the only thing in his world. There were whispers about him, about the darkness that clung to him like a second skin, but with me, he had been different.

Or so I fucking thought.

University changed everything.

It was supposed to be a fresh start. A new chapter. Instead, it felt like I had stepped into a world where I was nothing. Rosewood University was his territory, his fucking playground. But it wasn't his father running the show—it was his uncle. A man whose name carried weight, whose presence was a quiet, lingering threat in the air. People feared him, and by extension, they feared Sinister too.

And somewhere between high school and here, Sinister had stopped giving a shit about me.

He didn't look at me the same way anymore. The heat in his gaze, the way he used to pull me into his orbit like I was the only thing that mattered—it was gone. Now, he barely acknowledged me, walking past like I was just another girl in the crowd.

Except when he wanted me.

Because, fuck, he still wanted me. Just not in the way he used to.

I wasn't his girlfriend anymore—I was his fucking convenience. His late-night call when he was bored, his distraction when he was feeling lonely. He never said it, never spelt it out, but I felt it every time I ended up in his bed, every time he used me to fill whatever void he had, only to toss me aside once the sun came up.

And the worst part? I let him.

Because even now, after everything, I still fucking wanted him. Even when he paraded around campus with other girls, even when he acted like I was nothing more than a past mistake, even when jealousy tore through me like a blade every time I saw his hands on someone else.

I hated him.

But I hated myself more for still craving him.

Because no matter how much he pushed me away, no matter how much I told myself to move the fuck on, I never could.

I was still his.

It was almost 8 o'clock and I realized with a sinking feeling that I was running late for my class. Panic set in as I wondered if I had forgotten to set my alarm, but quickly dismissed the thought as I was sure I had set it the night before. I couldn't help but wonder why Sophia, my usual alarm clock, hadn't woken me up. Despite the nagging feeling, I quickly got dressed and rushed out the door, making sure to lock it behind me. As I was already late, I decided to drive my car to school instead of taking the bus like I usually do. Upon arriving at school, I briskly walked towards my class while scrolling through my phone to check for any messages. To my surprise, I discovered several missed calls and text messages from Sophia, saying that she had fallen ill and wouldn't be able to make it to college that day due to a fever. Attending a lecture is torturous, but doing so without your best friend is pure hell. How am I supposed to survive the day without her? Suddenly, I bumped into someone. I mumbled an apology but didn't look up to see who it was.

By the time I reached my class, I was out of breath. But I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw that the professor had not yet arrived. There was only one seat left, so I quickly made my way towards it. After some time, the lecture began, and I tried to focus solely on the lecture, but it was getting quite difficult to do so when there was constant chattering going on behind me. I tried to ignore them, but something caught my attention. They were talking about me and Sinister.

"What? I can't believe she's still with Sinister. After what happened at the party, it's just ridiculous! Is she really that delusional to think he actually likes her? She must be using him for his money or something. It's sad to see Sinister caught up in such a mess," said one of them.

Rage filled within me after what I heard. I wanted to confront them. Shout at them that I'm not a gold digger. I'm not the one forcing Sinister to be in this relationship—if anything, it's the opposite. He's the one who refuses to let me go, the one who keeps me tied to him on his terms. But I decided against it because it's not as if they are going to believe me. Suddenly, I find myself recalling the events of that awful night. Even if he had stopped being mine.