9.3

At 10:30 PM, I decided to go out and check—a risky venture given the time.

Fortunately, due to the heavy rain, there was no sign of anyone in the hallway.

I headed from the hallway to the emergency stairs and made my way to Ichinose's room.

Then, I pressed the doorbell, trying to call out to Ichinose, who should've been inside.

The sound of the doorbell echoed faintly from the other side of the door.

But no matter how long I waited, there was no response.

There was no way for her to be sure that the one visiting was me. However, it seemed she was showing her intention not to meet anyone right now, regardless of their identity.

I took out my phone from my pocket and pressed the call button.

The call tone started ringing, indicating that her phone hadn't been turned off since it was last read.

Five times, six times—

Even after the call rang more than ten times, Ichinose did not answer the phone.

I pressed the end call button and quietly knocked.

"It's me. The deadline for our promise is about to end, that's why I came here."

I conveyed this with my own voice, not through the phone.

Even considering the heavy rain, speaking out like this was naturally a big risk.

I was visiting when other girls could've spotted me. It wouldn't immediately cause a commotion, but the one to find me would be obliged to report the offender, and I would be held responsible.

Therefore, I wouldn't repeat myself indefinitely.

If Ichinose still wouldn't respond, I had no intention of pursuing it further.

I certainly wanted to know the answer, but I couldn't take that high of a risk.

I would just have to accept it as Ichinose's answer.

The other side of the door remained silent.

"I'll wait just three more minutes. If there's no response, I'll leave, so don't worry."

I quietly began counting down 180 seconds.

During that time, I looked back at the heavy rain.

50 seconds, 40 seconds... the remaining time decreased.

When the final 30 seconds were just about to start, something changed.

My phone vibrated faintly. It was because I received a message.

['Why did you come?']

It was none other than Ichinose—the person on the other side of the door.

If sending a message was all she could manage, then I could just reply to her on my phone.

['I told you. Today was the promised day.']

['It's already late at night. It's past curfew.']

After that message arrived, while I was replying, another message from Ichinose came.

['I don't have the courage to go to your room right now, Ayanokōji-kun. Sorry.']

['I understand that. That's why I came here.']

This reply was read immediately, but no more messages came back.

I continued to send another message

['I'll wait one more minute. If the door doesn't open by then, let's pretend the promise never happened.']

This message was also properly read.

Now it was up to Ichinose to decide.

She could dislike or doubt me—if she chose to continue fighting through the next year despite that, that was her choice to make.

She might even feel disgusted with the school and choose to leave voluntarily.

Or, she could do something I couldn't predict. Naturally, Ichinose had the option.

After getting an answer, it would be fine if she showed herself then.

Soon, the time limit was less than 10 seconds away.

I was about to change my mind and leave when my phone vibrated again.

['The door is unlocked, come in.']

That message was from Ichinose.

Unlocked?I read those words over and over. Something felt out of place.

Recently, I knew without having to look into things that Ichinose hadn't been going out, and she was avoiding meeting with anyone.

Then, this door, the only connection between the inside and out, should naturally be locked.

Had a classmate that visited Ichinose been invited in after I looked into things?

Of course, all possibilities were possible, but... the probability seemed low.

Had she considered the possibility that I would be the one to visit her today instead?

It was hard to determine.

If this had been a phone call or face-to-face conversation, I could've fished for the answers, but unfortunately, it was difficult to discern intentions through impersonal messages.

The unexpected message surprised me a bit, but I decided to move forward.

I cautiously reached for the doorknob.

Indeed, the door was unlocked and opened smoothly.

However, no light awaited beyond the opened door; the room was enveloped in silence and darkness.

"Ichinose, are you there?"

I muttered, but no voice returned.

I quietly closed the door I had opened.

The lights were off inside the room, making it nearly impossible to see anything, and sound was similarly absent.

The only audible noise was a faint hum from the refrigerator's compressor.

"Ichinose?"

I called out again, but still no reply came back.

Since I couldn't just take off my shoes and enter, I decided to take my time.

As I couldn't grasp the situation any further, I quietly waited for my eyes to adjust to the darkness.

As my eyes gradually adapted to the dark, I was able to spot Ichinose in the corner of the room, hugging her knees with her face down.

"Even though curfew passed, you don't care?"

"That's my line as well. Since you invited me in, Ichinose, you also bear some responsibility."

"...That's true."

I heard Ichinose's voice for the first time in a while.

She seemed more energetic than I had expected, and she didn't appear to be in poor health.

"Ayanokōji-kun, you value this day more than I imagined."

Ichinose murmured, referencing how I had gone out of my way to risk visiting.

"But that isn't for my sake—it's for your own... right, Ayanokōji-kun?"

Ichinose must've understood that much by now.

"Yes."

So I nodded without hesitation and continued speaking.

"I decided a year ago. Today is the day to enact the student Ichinose Honami's kaishaku."

(TL Note: "Kaishaku (介錯人) is a term historically associated with ritual suicide (seppuku), where a second person would deliver a final blow.")

If someone heard this, they might angrily question what I meant bykaishaku.

"Kaishaku... In which sense do you mean that?"

Ichinose muttered briefly, neither angry nor flustered.

Generally, when people heard'kaishaku,' most would only imagine the negative meaning.

This was because they'd interpret it as delivering the final blow to cause instant death during seppuku. However, kaishaku had another meaning. It could mean the opposite—to attend to someone and take care of them.

"That's what you'll soon come to understand."

"Is that so... "

"If it's okay with you, may I come in?"

"...Please do. Just make sure to lock the door."

It was unlikely that anyone would visit at this hour, but it was better to be cautious.

Following her request, I locked the door and removed my shoes before stepping inside. The room was dark, making it hard to see where I was stepping, but it was neatly arranged and seemed free of any tripping hazards.

Despite the darkness, I stopped walking once I reached a position where I could clearly see Ichinose's state.

"You might not want to see me—maybe you never want to see my face again—however, I wanted to talk today. This might be the last chance we have to talk at leisure."

"Cutting off all ties... we won't even be able to remain as friends. Is that what this means, I wonder."

"I won't deny it. If we both decide that's best, it's necessary."

Ichinose could've dismissed me from the start, saying she didn't even want to be friends.

If that was the worst-case scenario for Ichinose, it was because she regretted her lack of judgment.

What I was about to tell her was nothing short of cruel.

"Is there anything you want to tell me first? If not, I'm ready to give my answer."

If unnecessary chatter was unwelcome, it was best to get to the point.

"...Yes. Tell me."

Without turning her face, Ichinose gave an affirmation, perhaps prepared.

"The result of the end-of-year special exam was a crossroads of fate. If your class lost, it would be nearly impossible to recover from the current situation. You could say that it was a battle you absolutely couldn't lose to. However, the result was Horikita's class's victory. In other words, the path to Class A was cut off."

"That's right. I think there are still many in the class who haven't given up, but it's impossible... because I couldn't beat you, Ayanokōji-kun. Because of that, I crushed everyone's dreams."

"That's right. The class was defeated because its leader, you, was weak. The responsibility you hold is significant. But anyone can blame that part on you. There would be no need for me to come here to enact the kaishaku if that was all."

Ichinose didn't move. Whether she was prepared or not, she kept her head down, looking at the ground.

"However, surprisingly, there's still a chance to put your class back on its feet."

"That's a strange thing to say. Isn't the path to Class A cut off...?"

"Only as long as you remain the leader of the class, that is."

For the first time, Ichinose's shoulders jolted.

"...So... are you telling me to step down as the leader?"

"If you want to win for the sake of the class, then do it as soon as possible."

"I see... But if that's the case, it won't be long before it happens. I no longer have the qualifications or confidence to lead the class..."

I could feel the strength being poured into the hands that clutched her knees.

"I'm sorry, but that alone isn't enough. While stepping down as leader is a given, beyond that, someone who can lead the class to victory needs to take that empty role. Only then can your class regain the potential to be Class A."

"A leader who can guide us? Who are you thinking of...? Kanzaki-kun?"

"Nobody in particular. Currently, there's no one in your class capable of making a comeback."

"If that's the case, it's an impossible tale from the start..."

"If there's no one in your class, then we should bring someone from another class."

"...What do you mean...?"

"I will transfer to your class and become the new leader."

This was one of the strategies I had been developing.

Here, I confessed the strategy to Ichinose.

"Ayanokōji-kun, you...?"

"You should understand my abilities by now, whether for better or worse. The 500-points gap with Horikita's class isn't an easy fight, but I can easily overtake them within a year."

"After finally moving up to Class A, you would throw that away to come to a lower class...?"

"It might be an idea that's hard to understand normally. But rest assured, if this is achieved, I can graduate your current class from Class A, just as you wish."

For the first time, Ichinose, who had continued hugging her knees, looked up.

I thought she might've been crying, but it doesn't seem like it.

"Ah... I see. That's what it is..."

She seemed to have realized something, showing a deep understanding.

Then Ichinose slowly looked at me.

Perhaps in her eyes, I appeared as an executioner who had come to end her life.

"The predetermined plan was for you to defeat me in the end-of-year special exam,

Ayanokōji-kun. If I had won, this proposal wouldn't have been made—"

If Ichinose won, the class points would have remained nearly balanced.

In that case, there would be no need for me to transfer classes.

That view, that way of thinking, was half correct.

"I won't deny that it was one of the options. Still, if you had defeated me and shown the strength that made me unnecessary, I would've welcomed that too."

It meant that I had honestly intended to go with kaishaku's 'helping' definition.

"I see... But that's not a bad deal for our class, right? If you fight in my place and aim for

Class A, Ayanokōji-kun, we should be happy about it."

"That's right. But you might've guessed, right?"

"Yes... There has to be a condition, correct?"

Just having Ichinose step down as leader and taking that position myself wouldn't constitute 'kaishaku.'

"I'll transfer to your class and graduate from Class A, but I require that you, Ichinose Honami, get expelled from this school."

That was the only requirement I sought.

If she agreed to this, the deal would be done.

"...My expulsion..."

Considering that condition, what would Ichinose think?

How would she act?

Since this morning, I had been intrigued by her answer.

We were at the crossroads of many strategies I had set up. Regardless of where we would end up, I predicted the patterns of answers, but which path we'd take was up to Ichinose herself to decide.

"Sorry. I don't have enough private points..."

"Don't worry. The transfer itself isn't difficult. We'll gather all the private points you have, of course, and we'll gather from all your classmates as well. If that's still not enough, we can borrow from the first-years. If we promise to repay with interest, there will be students willing to lend. With the trust you possess, it won't be difficult to gather the missing points when promising to return it with interest. Even if we can't gather all 20 million, it isn't hard to come up with how we'll acquire the remainder."

And with that, the simple class transfer would be completed.

Just 20 million private points guaranteed Class A.

"Even if this can be realized... what's your purpose in doing all this, Ayanokōji-kun?"

"A certain graduate once told me to become a memorable student. At least, each classes' leaders are now strongly aware of my presence. Not just the leaders, but other class members are gradually becoming aware as well."

Whether that awareness was right or wrong didn't matter.

"Once this transfer is completed, it will definitely make me a memorable student."

"...Right."

"Do you remember what I told you a year ago—to stay true to yourself?"

'During that year, you'll push forward with your classmates, as far as you can go. There will be happy times and sad times along the way. And I think there will be times when you feel crushed and disheartened. But even so, don't ever stop.'

That message I conveyed a year ago—this is the true meaning.

"It was also to avoid damaging the class's value. By doing so, we could maintain the initial 40 student count given by the school, so even if you leave, someone else could enter the class, allowing us to start the third year with 40 students."

I was controlling and managing the initial state of the class with my own hands.

"This is because I consider starting from the base to be ideal."

"If I stay, there will be 41 people... it would be distorted."

"Of course, that's not the only reason. Your existence is an obstacle for the class. It's your characte —you have a power that I can't control."

If Ichinose were to show resistance to me, those who would follow her wouldn't just stop at one or two students.

This would hinder the normal operation of the class.

"I see... Amazing, Ayanokōji-kun. You really think of every possible scenario..."

However, this divergence slightly differed from the future I originally envisioned.

Since Sakayanagi left, things didn't go as planned, resulting in me correcting the course.

"If I voluntarily withdraw, the class points will drop even further. Can you still win?"

"Normally, it would be tough to fight. Whether we can accumulate over 800 class points purely depends on the rewards offered by the school. But the words you just said are key to the strategy. If we can force other class' students to drop out through unofficial means, not only can we close the gap with the points we receive, but we can also do so by taking points from others."

She couldn't get her friends to Class A with her own abilities.

If she took responsibility and voluntarily withdrew, she could make sure her friends graduate

from Class A.

Ichinose, feeling a great responsibility for the loss, had two possible options.

This was indeed the last crossroad.

"If I really withdraw... will you take them to Class A?"

"I promise."

This was the truth.

I was negotiating with the intent of leading Ichinose's class to Class A.

"Then, I will—"

"But Ichinose, let me tell you something important first. I will definitely lead your class to Class A, but I can't guarantee the graduation of all 39 classmates excluding me."

"Eh...?"

"Of course. We can't afford to carry any dead weight for the comeback. If I feel a student is unnecessary, I will naturally cut them off. To make up for the significant gap in class points, eliminating weaknesses is one of the top priorities. If there's a chance to force someone out through special exams, I'll use it without hesitation. Whether it's Amikura, Norihito, or someone close to you, I won't make any distinctions. It's the same as what I did with Maezono in Horikita's class."

In fact, I had already set a precedent with Maezono. I had used her and forced her to withdraw.

Ichinose was experiencing firsthand a reality that didn't allow for dreaming.

"However, it won't be 10 or 20 people withdrawing. At most, a few will disappear."

The answer narrowed down to two choices.

One is to accept my current proposal, bring me into her class, and then voluntarily withdraw.

The other is to reject my proposal, continue as the class leader fueled by hatred.

No, in reality, there was only one option left.

Ichinose Honami could not abandon her classmates.

It was a 99% chance—Ichinose would rise again as the class leader and start fighting.

From there, I would have no choice but to forcibly arrange the battle between the four classes.

However, it was unlikely that the balance among the four classes would be correctly maintained.

That couldn't be helped.

But neither of those answers were what I wanted.

I was actually seeking a third answer.

I found myself hoping for a third answer, one that even I didn't have.

"That's cruel, isn't it...?"

"Indeed."

It was a futile wish.

Ichinose would soon stand up in anger and reach the conclusion to fight.

Even so... I still desired it.

It was something I had instilled in her a year ago, on the day I decided to enact the kaishaku on Ichinose Honami—the seeds to controlling both the positive and negative

romantic emotions from within a human.

No, it wasn't limited to love.

Being helped and betrayed, receiving goodwill and hostility.

I had interacted with her with the purpose of mixing these contradictory emotions.

In a short period, a multitude of positives and negatives tumultuously stirred inside of Ichinose.

It had reached its peak.

Undoubtedly, Ichinose's goodwill had flipped due to my betrayal.

In psychological terms, this state was called ambivalence.

Ambivalence particularly amplified the influence of the less desirable feelings.

When I was in the White Room, I learned of its existence during my studies.

Therefore, it was highly likely that Ichinose, fueled by hatred, would oppose me afterward.

I just wanted to closely observe what kind of changes she'd undergo as a new experiment.

And Ichinose was indeed the perfect test subject for this.

Now, she harbored hatred for me that surpassed her feelings of affection.

The deeper the love, the stronger the hatred would become.

Sometimes, this could lead to a psychological state significant enough to cause neurosis, one that couldn't be taken lightly.

However, you couldn't call this a new experiment.

Increasing hatred and breaking the spirit—this had been done in past experiments with results that were already known.

What I truly wanted to see was a different outcome.

The 1% unknown.

Is that too much to hope for?

"I... definitely don't want to hurt my friends."

"Then you have no choice but to keep fighting on your own."

"But, that surely won't get us to Class A."

What awaited was just a futile year.

"Then, will you choose to drop out and entrust it to me?"

"Whether I drop out or not, maybe that's the answer you're waiting for, Ayanokōji-kun."

That's right.

I didn't deny anything.

"But... I feel like neither of those is the real answer."

Words I hadn't expected to hear so soon came out of her mouth.

I couldn't hide the strong stimulation flowing through my brain.

"Both are wrong? Then, what do you think is the right choice?"

"I don't want to lose any of my friends. I can't afford to lose them."

"That's just an ideal, and it's selfish."

"Yes, it's probably impossible with my abilities alone. But with you, Ayanokōji-kun, it can be realized."

"You're not dropping out, yet you still want me to transfer to your class—is that what you mean to say?"

When I asked, Ichinose smiled for the first time today, shaking her head from side to side in denial.

Then, she articulated the path she had imagined: a path without a path.

She presented a method to achieve balance among the four classes, conceived through her own thoughts.

She reached the 1% answer I had hoped for.

"So that's... that's the solution you've thought of."

"Could it be that I'm wrong?"

"...No."

I lost my words and couldn't immediately continue.

Ichinose's classmates admired her and aimed for Class A together with her.

It was the only possibility that didn't picture anyone missing upon graduation.

She had now grasped the elements she lacked as a leader.

If we were only talking about Ichinose's potential, she might've surpassed Horikita and Ryūen.

If she was able to completely overcome her mental weakness and discard her naivety, it was really uncertain how the next year would turn out.

I approached Ichinose and offered my hand.

"In order to make that choice a reality, we need to keep each other at a proper distance. Nothing can start without communication. Of course, the driving force can be hatred. There's no need for you to like me—"

"That's not right, Ayanokōji-kun."

Ichinose, who stood up while taking my hand, immediately denied it.

"This whole time I was shut away, I tried many times to dislike you. But I couldn't do it. Even though I know it's stupid, I couldn't change my affectionate feelings. And even today, no matter how cruel the words you showered onto me, that still hasn't changed."

A citrus scent wafted through the air—

From Ichinose, who had been shut away, such a smell reached me.

In the darkness, I noticed her glossy hair color.

Perhaps, I've made a big misunderstanding.

I thought that I led and guided everything today.

But actually...

"Did you know I'd come here?"

"Yes, I knew. You would definitely come to check what state I'm in, what feelings I have. You wouldn't be able to suppress that impulse."

Ichinose was certain that I would visit her today, no matter how late it got.

The emotionless messages on the phone. The door that wasn't locked.

The room that was cleaned and the fact that she was dressed as if expecting someone.

It meant she prepared everything.

I didn't think she could predict my proposal, but then again, I wasn't sure.

It wasn't unlikely for Ichinose to have sensed everything, even if she didn't know it all.

"It's already past curfew. If you leave the room now, someone might find you. That might interfere with our plans."

"That's true..."

"...So, I'll have to make you an accomplice, okay...?"

She exceeded my imagination, not just once but twice.

Indeed, Ichinose was excellent.

"How do you plan to make me an accomplice?"

"I won't allow any more unnecessary secrets between me and you, Ayanokōji-kun. I don't want to." Ichinose grabbed my hand.

She didn't say anything, yet she pulled forcefully.

Then, as if drawing me closer to her, she then pushed strongly against my chest.

Sit on the bed—I felt such an intention from her and sat down. No, I was made to sit.

Ichinose, standing in front of me, looked down at me.

"I think I understand Karuizawa-san better now."

"...What do you mean?"

"She probably touched your darkness, was saved, and then saw hell again. And you think that's necessary for her."

"Maybe."

"That's quite one-sided, isn't it? Even if it ends up being salvation, no one can say that the method is right. You hurt and break the other person on your own, then fix them."

Ichinose didn't know that I had broken up with Karuizawa.

However, she understood from the course of events that I was intending to break up with her.

"I'm the same, right? Just like Karuizawa-san—no, like the other students. We're all being made to dance in the palm of your hand."

Ichinose's eyes were beautiful. Clear, yet somehow dark, strong, weak, and sharp.

Her eyes, showing various changes, were now shining even more intensely.

They were a color that exceeded my calculations, indeterminate, neither light nor dark.

"You are—"

Both my shoulders were grabbed, and with weight applied, I was pushed backward.

"Ayanokōji-kun, you're using me, so I have the right to use you too, don't I?"

"At the very least, I have no right to deny that."

"My feelings for you cannot be changed. I can't forget them. Rather, I wanted to see you so badly. More than any of my classmates, more than any of my family, I can only think about you. But Ayanokōji-kun, you are different. You don't look at me. You think more broadly, and only about yourself."

Seeing through my true feelings, Ichinose smiled.

"I think that's okay, but I won't forgive you. Just as you've deeply engraved your existence into my heart without permission, I also want to deeply engrave my existence into your heart by my own will."

Weight was placed on my hands atop Ichinose's bed, and it faintly creaked.

Her hands grabbed mine and moved them.

Ichinose's heartbeat, which I shouldn't have been able to hear directly, was transmitted through my hands.

It was clear that she was in an extremely tense state—it was very fast, far from calm.

Outside the window, the rain struck the glass and danced wildly.

"You're doing something terrible to Karuizawa-san. If she found out... she'd definitely be troubled, right?"

"Sorry, but I broke up with Karuizawa before coming here. I'm visiting a girl's room at night, so I've already taken care of the risk management."

<>

However, it originally stemmed from the consideration that she might've trapped me out of hatred.

"I see. I've been shut in my room lately, so I didn't know."

It wasn't surprising. This fact didn't pop up last week or yesterday.

It happened today—March 30th.

"So even doing this won't make it a tool for threats."

Ichinose's presence completely blocked my field of vision, and it was shrouded in darkness.

"I don't intend to threaten you."

Whispering in my ear, Ichinose blushed, but she didn't change her assertive stance.

She pressed her lips against mine.

The momentum was fast, and our teeth slightly collided, causing Ichinose to flinch a bit.

"Sorry, I'm not good at this. It's my first kiss—"

Saying that, she then laid her lips on mine, slowly and carefully.

"Is this right...? Is this the way to do it?"

"Yeah..."

"Aren't you going to run away?"

"There's no option for that. Escaping by force here would be riskier."

Ichinose had decided with firm conviction to ensure I couldn't escape.

If I tried to forcibly pull away, it would lead to a scuffle at worst.

The fate of a boy who entered the forbidden girls' floor late at night.

A mere warning wouldn't suffice.

Such was Ichinose's resolve.

Then, I too must reciprocate that resolve.

I reached for Ichinose's clothes and began to take them off.

Hesitating for a moment, her body stiffened, but soon relaxed, and she removed her top herself.

This was already beyond the realm of reason.

I had been entangled.

From the moment I stepped into that room, my retreat had already been cut off.

Yet at the same time, I was being drawn in by her unknown charm.

I thought I had finished needing to learn.

But perhaps, it had just been the beginning.

In that room, just the two of us, the night continued to darken.

It wasn't a ritual to become lovers.

If it were, it wouldn't have worked from the start.

It was an absolute contract, to be needed and to need the other.

And so, we were being bound together with that contract, sinking deeper and deeper, as we devoured each other endlessly.