Alessandro
Horror.
Absolute shock.
What is happening to me?
Why does everyone get away with deceiving me?
I feel useless and as dumb as a bitch. Can I ever get anything right?
Why do I always get used by people?
I'm a dumb mafia boss.
A very dumb mafia boss.
Possibly the worst mafia boss in history.
With each wave of hatred and self torture, I downed yet another glass of whisky down with great force.
I need something as heavy as this. I need to drown out the voices of my rotten father and my useless grandfather.
My father was laughing at me. I could hear it loud and clear.
It's in my head. His voice is in my head and I can't get it out. It's so loud that I hate it.
I hate hearing his roaring laughter as I imagined him smacking me over the head like he usually does which he knew that I hated.
I hated it whenever he did that. He made me feel very worthless and weak.
Like I would never amount to anything.