I Can Still Make Cheyenne

***

Never squat with your spurs on.

Cowboy Wisdom

***

There are two things sacred to cowboys.

The horse and the rodeo.

There are others, obviously, family, land, pride, but the horse and the rodeo reign supreme in their hearts.

Jake was on a horse before he could walk, and Lily Grace and Dustin were only a couple of months old before he introduced them to Trigger and took them riding.

He feels just as home on a horse as he feels in the air, and whenever he goes too long without one, he starts to feel an itch under his skin. Like a sliver of glass just deep enough that he can't get it out.

Something in his chest settles when he's home on the ranch, as much as he loves the rest of the world. 

That feeling was what always brought him back, no matter how far he strayed. The same feeling that always brought a Seresin back to this plot of dirt in North Texas, no matter how far they roamed. 

Every morning, he steps off the porch and onto the dirt. He takes a deep breath of crisp morning air and settles a little bit more.

Someday, it'll be enough to stop the urge to wander. 

Not yet, but someday.

The dirt on Jordan's grave is still dark and hasn't dried to match the rest in the sun yet, but there are chores and work to be done and lots of guests to manage.

Jake's not a hundred percent comfortable with having them all here. Feels like the two compartments of his life are starting to overflow into one another.

He's clinging to Bradley in the face of all this loss, and he knows they're going to have to talk about it at some point, but he doesn't want to do it here.

Doesn't want to taint the feeling of the ranch with the possibility of it ending with Bradley before it really started.

How's that fair?

Jake finally gets the guy he wants but loses his brother.

Now he's only got Peter left, and Peter's almost thirty-six.

What's Jake supposed to do when it's just him?

He won't be long behind him, and then Lily Grace and Dustin will be alone.

It only takes a few minutes to saddle the horses. Mary's Trigger. His dad's Sky Lark. Brian's Cloud. Michael's Gunner. Jessie's Rum Runner. Lily's Rose. Jordan's Baby Seal, which they all agreed was the stupidest name ever, but now it's stuck).

Peter grabs his gelding, Storm, and Jake, his mare, Bluebell. Lily Grace is almost tall enough not to need help saddling Tripper, but Dustin just holds Rain steady as Jake quickly saddles him.

It's an old tradition. For cowboys and cavalry.

The riderless horse.

The herd's getting smaller and smaller as the years go by. Jake can still remember his parents leading his first ride when Lily's Rose was the only empty saddle.

Now they set out as the sun begins to rise, riding hellbent across the prairie straight into the rising sun, chasing the people that went before them and trying to catch ghosts that are always just out of reach.

***

There's an art to breaking horses. An art to dealing with all animals, really. Some people forget that humans are just animals, too. Maybe that's why everyone struggles to get along.

That and the fact that people lie. 

Animals are simple. Survive or die. There's no grey. Animals aren't cruel just for the hell of it.

Lily Grace grew up with animals. There are photos of her crawling next to a batch of Aussie puppies, sleeping in the barn with her first foal when she was five, catching snakes when she found them in the garden. 

She knows how to treat an animal to ensure it won't hurt her, and she knows the signs to watch for when it's going to.

She's been watching her dad break horses for years.

Regardless of what they all think about the term brake, that's just what it's been called for so long. Training a horse to accept a rider is a long, arduous task that requires an incredible level of skill, knowledge and a human that's more stubborn than a horse, which is a rare thing to find.

Mary Seresin was a horsewoman to her core, but Davey had the touch. A gentle heart goes further with an animal than anything else, and Davey was the gentle one of the two of them.

Once the last ride is over, it's back to work. Life goes on and on regardless of who's no longer around.

Ren has a new crop of horses that need training, and Jake's one of the best at the ranch when it comes to breaking new young horses. 

Lily Grace has been doing her best to learn and has even started working alongside Ren in the initial stages.

Today's special, though. 

It's not a young colt or filly that's first up.

It's a wild stallion sent to the ranch by a horse rescue that couldn't control him.

He's Lily Grace's. She claimed him as soon as she saw him. Sixteen hands of sleek muscle, black as shadow and more ornery than even her father when he's in a mood.

She and Ren have been working with him for weeks, but so far, they've only progressed to getting the saddle within ten feet of him.

It's fitting, then, that all these people who think they have a claim to her dad are here to watch today, gathered at the fence beside Jake as she and Ren finally get the saddle on his back and secured.

None of them know anything about horses, that much is obvious from their questions, and Lily Grace is going to show them how little they know.

That she's her father's daughter.

With Javy and Adam holding the lead and her mother and father's permission, Ren boosts Lily Grace into the saddle, and all three of them dive for cover.

The stallion, who's already named Warrior, just shivers at first, dances sideways so violently that Lily Grace has to cling to stay on.

There's a brief, fleeting moment where she thinks this might be easier than expected and some stupid question from the rail.

"What's supposed to be happening exactly?" One of Bradley's fathers.

And then Warrior lives up to his name and erupts, not unlike the volcano she helped Dustin make for his science fair. 

His hooves clear the ground by at his four or five feet, and he twists in a way that seems like he should snap his spine but doesn't.

"Oh my god!"

"Jesus Christ, somebody grab her!"

"She's fine."

Amateurs. 

Lily Grace isn't getting off this horse until he does what she tells him.

"Lily Grace."

She lets go.

That's her father's voice, and she knows that tone. 

He catches her before she hits the ground while Javy, Adam, and Ren corral the stallion.

"I had it!"

"Look at him. He's not even tired. He could go for hours. You're not big enough to wear him down yet."

And he isn't. Warrior looks perfectly calm now, ear cocked. Like he's just been standing around doing nothing.

"I can ride for hours."

"There's a difference."

And he isn't. Warrior looks perfectly calm now, ear cocked.

And it's embarrassing to have this discussion in front of everyone, even though her dad's talking low, and they can't hear.

She still failed, and they were all watching.

"You didn't fail."

Because she's his daughter, so of course, he knows.

"Willpower only goes so far, sweetheart. You've got everything you can control down. Now, you just have to wait until you grow big enough. Probably just another couple of years."

"That's forever! It's too long!"

"It's not. You'll get there before you know it."

Still, the tears burn, but she'll never let them fall. Turns it to anger instead because that's easier.

He drops a kiss on her forehead and sends her to the rail, and if it's not going to be Lily Grace who rides Warrior first, at least it's going to be Jake.

Bradley and his friends look nervous, his father's look terrified.

Her mother just smiles and gives her a hug, and says you'll get him next time, sweetheart. 

She settles on the rail to watch as Ren gives Jake a leg up, and they dive away again.

This time, Warrior doesn't hesitate and takes off like the broncs at the rodeo, throwing her father around in the saddle like a rag doll. 

Bradley looks like he's about to leap over the fence, which is amusing because what the fuck is he going to do?

Get kicked in the head, that's what.

The showdown lasts about ten minutes before Warrior is soaked and frothing at the mouth.

She knows her father wouldn't have let it go on much longer if Warrior hadn't stopped on his own. 

The Seresins have always believed that a good horse has spirit and a mind of its own. None of them want a mindless drone.

But one of Warrior's ears is cocked back, listening for Jake's command, and the other is cocked forward, listening to the world.

It'll take a few more sessions to be sure, but as her father settles him into a gentle lope around the arena, she can already see him settling. 

Elephants have genetic memories. Sometimes, she wonders if horses do, too. If there's a trace of knowledge of everything his ancestors have done to help humans and that instinct that gets passed down.

Her father's fair coloring, matched with Warrior's pitch black, is a stunning combination, and her mother and Ren's wolf whistle makes the hands laugh.

They laugh harder when her father flips them off as he rides by.

With her father helping with the horses, Lily Grace turns her attention to the other chores.

Specifically, the chickens.

She's been planning this all night, and since her father's co-workers are insisting on helping, it's easy to get Bradley and his fathers to follow her.

They're game enough. Well, Bradley and Maverick. Tom refuses to step inside. He's already figured out this isn't going to go well.

He must be the smart one.

But he's also not saying anything, and when Lily Grace glances at him as she closes the gate behind them, his eyes twinkle, and he winks.

He's already got his phone in his hand.

They have about thirty hens and three roosters. 

And people who live in the city have some odd beliefs about roosters.

Namely that they're stupid.

They are not. 

Lily Grace has seen them take out hawks and small foxes.

They are not to be messed with.

No animal is when hungry or threatened.

Bradley and Maverick, and she's going to start calling him Pete because that's his actual name, kind of just stand around awkwardly at first, holding buckets of feed, until the hens and the roosters start to realize the food's not coming, and so they go to it.

She told them to toss out equal handfuls so everyone gets some.

Even without her doing anything sneaky, they're trying too hard to follow her instructions, and when the first rooster gets annoyed with waiting and launches himself at the bucket in Bradley's hands, the others all follow suit.

She really, really hopes Tom has a good angle with his phone because watching two grown men trying to get away from a flock of chickens in a CHICKEN COOP is hilarious.

Apparently, common sense goes out the window when poultry is chasing you because neither of them thinks to go for the gate; they just toss all of the feed into the air, and it comes down like rain.

Lily Grace is going to have some fat chickens cause that's definitely more feed than they normally get.

It's not until Tom can't stop himself from laughing out loud that they realize they're being filmed. 

"Ice…."

"Not a chance, babe."

"Bradley, go left."

"Got it."

Then they're out and flanking the still-laughing Tom, completely forgetting that Lily Grace has her own phone.

***

Once they've survived the chickens and tried and failed to stop Tom from saving the video to the cloud, where they'll never get rid of it, Pete follows Lily Grace through the house to the old part that's still the homestead.

The original walls and roof are still standing, but they added a floor when the family finally had enough money.

The walls are covered in framed pictures and news articles and medals, one after another. 

Hundreds of Seresins back to the beginning. 

There isn't a single grey hair or wrinkle among them.

Forever young.

There was a time in his life when Pete thought that'd be him. When he was younger and wilder (and yes, Tom, he has calmed down).

He even found his first grey hair a few months ago and wasn't that a night. Pete threw a fit about getting old, and then Tom threw a fit about Pete not acting his age and stole the keys to his bike.

They hadn't actually talked that night, just sulked in their respective corners until age caught up with both of them, and they fell asleep and woke up sore and embarrassed.

Pete might not act his age, but Tom's the one who dyes the grays away.

You can't even see it against his blond hair!

Lily Grace can recite most of the stories by memory, and when she leads him into the den, the oldest room in the house with the original fireplace still in working order, he has to stop and take a breath. 

A couple hundred years of history cover the walls, not just pictures and articles. An original Sharpe's rifle and a pair of Colt Peacemakers, and Pete's not a gun guy, but he will be just for those two.

There's a cracked saddle mounted in the corner, with what he thinks might be a blood stain on it. There are multiple sets of spurs mounted on the walls, alongside a few stetsons and badges Pete knows are older than him.

Rings. There are a lot of wedding rings placed into the frame of wedding photos.

The Seresins aren't a family skilled at letting go, and if the story of their short lives is true, and it certainly looks like it is, then it's understandable response to such significant trauma.

It's odd that Pete's the one having such a hard time reconciling it. Tom, for all his brilliance and intelligence, trusts Reaper and the evidence that's right in front of him. He may not share their belief about what's causing it, but he can admit that whatever it is, the end result is real.

Tom buried his parents in his thirties, and Pete was there to help him.

Pete buried his before he joined the military, his mother of a broken heart that took years to kill her and his father…well, everyone knows what brought his father down.

It's easy to let Lily Grace's stories flow over him as he studies the pictures.

The Seresins are one of those families that clearly share the same blood. There's an abundance of blond hair, green eyes, and ridiculous dimples. 

Pete can see why Bradley's stuck on Jake. They clearly have similar tastes in that regard.

Somehow, what is clearly a celebration of life and accomplishment just makes him feel sad.

Pete never really expected to live to forty himself. Not for any grand reason, just his own unwillingness to slow down, but as much as Jake takes after him in that regard and Bradley takes after Tom, Jake has managed to grow up more than all three of them.

A kid just out of high school will do that to you.

Knowing when you're going to die probably does, too.

Every year Pete's a little bit more amazed he's still there, he knows better than to take anything for granted. 

What worries him is Bradley. And it's not just because Pete still carries a lot of guilt over how things went down between them and Goose, of course, but because he knows Bradley, deep down, is just like his mother. Sensitive and devoted and Carole never even bothered looking for someone else after Nick, not even something casual to fulfill physical needs. 

She couldn't stand the thought of being with someone else, and as much as Pete doesn't regret all the time spent with her and Bradley in those years, he can't help but wonder if they'd have both been happier if she found someone else. Had another chance at happiness. They never would have forgotten Nick, but maybe they wouldn't have been alone during those times when Pete and Tom couldn't be there. Maybe it would have been better for Carole to have someone in her life that wasn't so close to her dead husband and constantly wrapped up in remembering him.

If Jake dies, Bradley will end up just like Carole. Happy enough, maybe, but alone with nothing but a memory for company in the darkest hours. 

Is that enough?

Maybe it was for Carole, who had her son to dote on and care for and to distract her from the loneliness.

But would it be enough for Bradley?

Maybe.

But maybe not?

***

Cyclone is happy that he was able to pay his respects to Seresin's brother. He's less pleased that he's stuck witnessing the drama that is the personal lives of the dagger squadron, their commander, and the Commander of the Pacific Fleet.

He could be home relaxing and not having to talk to anyone, and instead, he's at a rodeo in North Texas watching Bradshaw try not to smoother Seresin while the other's accordingly stew and brood and try very hard not to look like they're obsessively watching the drama go down.

The video of Mitchell and Bradshaw was hilarious, though. That helps.

Cyclone's going to get one of those video picture frames and put it on there so he can keep it in his office because there's noise about making this squadron a permanent thing, which means Cyclone will have to deal with Maverick and these children on a daily basis.

Why can't they all be like Seresin and Machado? Professional, driven, and with no interest in sharing their drama with everyone else.

If Cyclone had a squadron of Seresins and Machados and maybe Bassetts he could take over the world.

He's already ignored two messages from a Captain Cole Hauser, demanding his pilots back now that the mission is over and warning that he wasn't pulling punches in his report on the mission. 

Not that Beau blames him, in hindsight its easy to see he was right, but civilian control of the military means sometimes they follow plans made by people with no idea of the realities of combat and war and what's possible and what's not. 

Beau's more concerned that Hauser seems convinced that Seresin and Machado are going to return to the Vigilantes as soon as their leave is over, and if Beau is going to be stuck with this unit, he's damn well going to have the only two pilots he can actually stand with him.

Maverick's refusal to take a promotion for so long is Beau's saving grace in the end because he's already gotten enough support behind closed doors to make any of the pilots but Maverick Flight Commander. 

Worst case, he ends up with two separate Elements and he has Seresin lead one and someone else lead two. And Maverick just sticks around as an experienced pilot to help train the others.

The only Kazansky could interfere would be an outright order that would put him at odds with most of his Squadron Commanders, and Beau doesn't think he's that stupid, especially since the likelihood of Maverick suddenly wanting a promotion and leadership position is minimal.

Beth's elbow jolts him out of his plans. How his five-foot-nothing wife always manages to get her elbow so high in her ribcage is beyond him, but she uses it effectively.

"Stop brooding; you're supposed to be having fun."

"I am having fun."

"You're thinking about work."

"I think work is fun."

She's not buying it because she's been able to see right through him since their first date, but she drops it with an amused hum and links their arms together instead.

She likes Jake and Javy, but to be fair, she likes them all because she's a sucker for young people figuring out how to make their way in the world.

She's a soft touch.

It makes them a good team. Their three girls are proof of that. Emily, Anna, and even wild child Sara have never really been trouble. Smart and beautiful and already on the road to success. 

He may be biased.

It's hard to believe Emily's only a year away from college, and the baby, Sara, is in her second year of high school.

Now, they're running around with the Daggers, wide-eyed and excited about everything the rodeo has to offer to someone who's never seen one before, and Beau IS slightly worried he's going to end up taking a baby horse home.

They'd have to get a new house because their yard is not big enough.

Thankfully, aside from the stunned looks of surprise when Beau's family showed up for the funeral, Kazansky, Mitchell, and the Daggers haven't been anything but polite and friendly, and his girls seem to have latched on to Lily Grace and, by extension, Mitchell.

As much as Beau dislikes him on a personal and professional level, he's not the least bit worried when the four of them wander off with no adult supervision except Mitchell.

Worst case scenario, Beau has anything they buy delivered to Kazansky's house and lets him deal with it.

Beth doesn't think any of them are as bad as Beau makes out, but she also thinks the purpose of jail is rehabilitation and that everyone deserves a second chance. 

The Seresin ranch came out in force, so there's a friendly face wherever he looks, and it's easy enough to pull Ted and Amara aside and make them promise to make sure no one buys a horse. 

Or a cow, because apparently, that's a thing??

His nerves have settled somewhat after a few gallons of coffee and a surprisingly good breakfast by the time they settle in the stands for the events.

His kids and the Daggers are practically vibrating from all the sugar they've had and Amara gratefully hands over Dustin so he can sit on Beau's shoulders and see the entire arena. 

They end up packed in next to Kazansky and Mitchell, but it's not too bad with all the kids and Daggers piled down at the rail. None of the adults care about small talk.

At least, not until the announcement of the ceremonial ride in honor of Brian Seresin.

That explains where Jake and Javy went.

Ha, the look on a few faces is funny, though. Bradshaw looks like he's about to have a stroke and Kazansky's whispering furiously at Ted, who just smirks.

When the horn sounds and the bull, the son of Nail 'Em Hard because apparently that means something, comes out, flinging Jake around like a doll, Beau has a brief moment of fear that he's going to lose his favorite pilot and be stuck with the rest of them.

Jake wouldn't do something this stupid without being sure he could do it.

Jake wouldn't do something this stupid without being sure he could do it.

Jake wouldn't do something this stupid without being sure he could do it.

Beth's screaming cheers along with the crowd, on her feet, and even Kazansky's getting into it. Half the Daggers and his daughters are literally climbing the rails as the clock ticks over to eight seconds, and Jake lets go and flies through the air.

Beau doesn't relax until the rodeo clowns and Jake clear the rail of the arena and the bull finally realizes he's got no one to gore and gets herded back into the chute. 

"I think I just had a heart attack," Mitchell mutters, and really, even Beau knew what was coming.

"Now you know how I feel every time you do something stupid," Kazansky sounds like he's been waiting years to say that, and Mitchell's sheepish look confirms it.

They watch Lily Grace smash the competition in her age group for roping and barrel racing, and Ren's horses go for the highest prices at the auction, where Beau just barely manages to catch Sara's hand before she spends half their savings on a beautiful chestnut filly that would have a miserable time in San Diego.

He breathes a sigh of relief when they're headed back outside for another round of food and drinks, and he gulps the beer Beth presses into his hand without question.

He doesn't even twitch when Mitchell joins him for another round.

***

Bradley has had more heart attacks today than the rest of his life combined.

~tbc~