Weight of Failure

Kiara's shadows loom over her, the dim chilling skeletal shadow stretched across the dusty marble floor. The royal guards stood emotionless and their postures felt rigid. It was as if time had stopped in its tracks. Their emotionless mask makes the grand room feel unnervingly dead. 

"You proved yourself to be much more resilient than we thought." the Arbiter fake compliments, his compassion dripping with snobbery and quiet disdain. 

"Yeah thanks," Kiara rolls her eyes, showing a sense of sass towards the elderly leaders. She sticks out her tongue while smirking and throws a lazy peace sign at them. 

The room tenses.

"Oh she did not just do that," Zhang's eyes widened bewildered by Kiara's actions. 

The Arbiter just narrows his eyes. His unnatural compassionate smile stretched across his face. The council members scowl at the sight of Kiara's lazy peace sign and her childish act of sticking out her tongue. A low murmur of disapproval ripples through the room. 

"Are you a fan of history, Kiara?" the Arbiter says in a casual tone, tilting his head, and analyzing Kiara's movements and expression. 

"Uh. Sure?" Kiara shrugs her shoulders awkwardly, her posture uneven as she shifts her gaze trying to avoid eye contact. 

"History is the greatest sense of discipline you could gain," the Arbiter explains, his tone relaxed, almost affectionate, "It is a way to mirror both our strengths and weaknesses. When you fail with inadequacy- you are seen as another lost soul."

Kiara felt something tighten around her chest. 

The faint scent of candle wax and lingering traces of aged wood does little to overpower the faint scent of the dust falling onto the floor. The grand imposing chamber felt very small as the marble walls seemed to press in on her conscience. 

"Ooh so scary," Kiara mutters to herself, out of earshot of the council members. 

Kiara chuckles at her thoughts, remembering all the times she studied for a major history test but always got a disappointing grade. 

The room falls silent as the Arbiter ever calm leans forward. Without any warning, a cold voice breaks through the silence, his words cutting through like a sharp knife. 

"Which countries represent Asia and Europe as pillars of Warden society alongside America, and why is each continent represented by a single country's temple?" the Arbiter yells out. The question hangs in the air, its simplicity taunting.

He speaks up, his voice sharp as a razor. "Across Europe and Asia, there exist multiple temples yet only one stands as one of the three pillars of warden society alongside us. Why were they chosen to represent their region?"

No explanation. No build-up. Just the expectation that Kiara will answer it correctly. 

That's not history. That's called geography. Kiara's mind races with thoughts, memories of last-minute cramming overwhelm her brain. Maybe he needs a crash course on the difference between borders and people and not ancient battles- get it together old man. 

Kiara imagines herself drawing a big red circle over a continent and labeling it: Geography 101 for old men. 

She spent the last couple of days training for combat situations, battle stances, and drills- none of which mattered now. Just great. 

Kiara mutters to herself quietly. "Okay. Think Kiara. Think. I have half an Asian brain in here somewhere. Tap into that ancestral knowledge and not let my American side win."

"Perhaps we should simplify the question for her." a female council member with curly hair speaks up, "It may be a bit too advanced for such a new recruit like her."

How about you simplify your scratchy voice 'Grandma' Kiara thinks in her head. I'm not the one who doesn't understand basic social studies. 

"If you struggle with something so simple, what will likely happen to you in a real crisis?" a male council member shakes his head, scoffing at the idea, "A warden should not just study combat, but also train their minds. Something you lacked to do apparently."

Kiara's expression tightens as she lets the council member's words sink in. The blunt words from the man-made the heat in her chest rise. The urge to snap back at the man is powerful but she manages to hold back-barely.

Yet a bottomless empty feeling nagged at her. It twisted into a knot and a coil squeezed tightly on her airways. Her lips and throat felt dry and parch. 

The Arbiter with his cool demeanor, and sharp perception sees through Kiara's youthful rebellion cutting through it like a blade slicing through silk. 

Oh, that's what breaks that fake mask of yours, the Arbiter scoffs at the sight below him, fidgeting with his fingers. He looks directly at the council members and then back at Kiara. It's all surface level- what are these kindergarten taunts? When you break someone emotionally- you make them doubt why they're even here. 

"Kiara. Time is not a luxury. Can you please answer the question?" the Arbiter politely asks, not even looking in her direction. 

Make them feel like they don't belong here. Make them feel like they're failing at everything. The Arbiter analyzes himself, tapping a sip out of his teacup. ' "I want to fight because I want to protect the people'- What a weak response. Self-doubt is dripping from your response Kiara. That's your weakness.

"You know the three pillar temples?" Seth asks Adam skeptically. The young boy raises his eyebrow trying to figure out what's going on in Adam's brain.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Adam raises his hands up defiantly, confused at the whole ordeal."

"I just need to check if your brain is actually working after the whole old people slang," Seth shrugs his shoulders, yawning at the thought. 

"Of course, I know it, I'm more worried about if Kiara knows it." Adam mutters beneath his breath, "She wanted to study the more fun and action stuff instead of actual history. Highly unlikely she is going to bomb this question."

The Warden Society is upheld by three nations, each one representing a fundamental pillar of its foundations.

America- The Bastion of the West.

Britain - The Crown of Renaissance.

China- The Kingdom of the Eternal East

Together these nations sustain and shape the structural balance of Warden Society, shaping its laws, traditions, and future. Compared to smaller regional temples, they were dots on a map.

It's important for a warden to know these three nations, Adam thinks to himself, crossing his arms. 

I hope Master Edward actually taught her this basic piece of the system she is a part of, Zhang looks skeptically at Edward, narrowing his eyes at the elderly warden. 

I really should have taught her, Edward's sweat droplet trails off his forehead. Still maybe if she says something close enough, they'll accept it–

"My answer is that France represents Europe and Mongolia represents Asia," Kiara shouts out her answer, raising many eyebrows out of all the upperclassmen.

Kiara was so caught up in her answer that she didn't realize the absurdity of her second response. She quickly notices the silence in the room. 

It felt like someone dropped a pin onto the floor silencing the people around her. 

Mongolia? Everyone in the evaluation center thinks to themselves. The room goes silent for a moment, and the disbelief settles in like a thick fog. The upperclassmen and seniors couldn't hear their ears- out of all countries possible, Kiara picks Mongolia. Everyone exchanges baffled glances at Kiara and then at Edward. 

The Arbiter reacting to the whole situation couldn't help but raise an eyebrow. He subtly puts his hands over his mouth trying not to laugh. A slight smirk tugs on his lips but he hides it just in time.

Oh, you made my job so much easier, the Arbiter thinks to himself. He knows this undermines both Edward's and her credibility as well as lowers her place in the eyes of other wardens. 

A male council member just turns his gaze towards Kiara. His face was genuinely confused and concerned, an almost pitying response leaving his lips. "No..uh. Not even close. Britain represents Europe and China represents Asia."

Kiara stepped back a bit trying to compose herself- it was just a mistake while a very stupid mistake at best and a humiliating one at worst. 

Many upperclassmen suppress their laughs while others shake their heads. Kiara felt their eyes looking down on her, like a thousand invisible daggers. 

"I guess Kiara and Adam have a talent for silencing the crowd," Seth mutters under his breath, shaking his head.

"I heard that little boy." Adam leans his head, looming over the small child. 

"Ah." Seth instinctively slaps Adam in the face caught off guard by his sudden move. "Oh my god. Don't do that Adam. Things are already tense right now."

Kiara hears Seth and Adam play fighting above her yet she couldn't manage to force a smile while overhearing the council's word chip at her harder than the last. 

"Maybe if she pays attention in the study room instead of daydreaming about protecting and fighting out in the frontlines, you know what's expected of you." a lanky council member critically dismisses her. 

"She's really unprepared if she's not prepared for something so simple." The curly-haired female member coldly speaks up. 

Kiara wanted to argue back, to tell them that she was more than just a simple mistake but her words were stuck in the back of her throat.

Hmm. The Arbiter smirks and tugs on his lips, It's too easy. 

As the hands on the clock transition into later in the day, the questions become more and more obscure and difficult for Kiara. They become more hyper-focused on details or abstract interpretations of events. 

"When was the former Arbiter assassinated?" one of the council members asks, "Either give the date or time frame from now."

What Kiara thinks to herself, blood dripping down her forehead, I don't even remember when JFK was killed?

Silence.

"I don't know '150 years ago," Kiara sarcastically guessed. 

"Wrong. 25 years ago," the council member bluntly corrects, "This is basic knowledge for the American temple. The biggest scandal of the century." 

"Biggest scandal?" Kiara's eyes widened. 

Zhang and Edward's jaws tighten at the thought of that event. Edward looks in the other direction, his hand gripping tightly on his crossed arms until his knuckles turn white. 

"Who was the first recorded warden to establish the ranking system for spiritual warriors?" the female council members coldly inquired. Silence. 

"What doctrine did the British temple establish that all wardens follow to this day?" Kiara tries to answer but hesitates. 

How long has it been? Thirty minutes? An hour? Kiara breathes heavily to herself, her shoulders raising up and rapidly dramatically unable to control herself. 

"Let's make it easy for you- What century are we in right now or is that too much for you." a male council member dismissively says. 

"It's the 21st century," Kiara says confidently knowing that is the correct answer. Edward gives her a slight brief nod. It wasn't much but it was a confirmation that he was still in the corner, no matter how the council treated her. 

Calm down, you can't lose focus. Kiara reassures herself but her suit collar feels constricting around her neck, her posture slouched and her breathing becoming faulty. I got this.

"When was the American temple established?" the lanky council member politely questions.

Kiara's vision starts to blur. She stands there frozen, her hands shaking uncontrollably. She felt a heavy sensation resting on her chest and without thinking she blurted out, "300 years ago!" 

Everyone couldn't believe their ears. 

300 years ago? Are you insane girl? Kiara antagonizes herself, her body shifting subtly back and forth. I'm American but not that American. I can't believe I just said that. What happened to "I got this"? 

Edward's voice is like static trying to cut through her spiraling thoughts but they feel muffled. Kiara's chest tightens, the weight of the moment crushing her deeply. 

 I can't think properly. Why can't I think properly? Kiara panics trying to gain control but the weight of the High Council and the Arbiter weighs heavily on her. I need to prove them wrong but how? I just made everything worse. 

"She's panicking," Anby catches Kiara breathing heavily, her gaze darting out aimlessly across the room. Kiara's friend's words felt like an echo in the background as Kiara couldn't focus on them. 

Adam stares at a weary battered Kiara breathing heavily to herself. 

The B-rank Alwin Dubois tips his rice hat trying to hide his gaze from the other senior wardens. Adam catches the cloak man standing on the other side of the room in his eye, his interest piquing from Alwin's calm demeanor.

The barriers she built around herself have now failed, the Arbiter assures himself proudly, She can't think straight anymore. Once you have them panicking, they struggle to make basic decisions.

"I don't want to rush you but if you want to prove yourself, now's your chance," the Arbiter raises his hands, gesturing towards Kiara, "You can still make a comeback. You all don't want to be the weak link, don't you?" His sympathetic warm-hearted voice stings at Kiara, it felt very heartwarming yet something felt suffocating around it. 

Kiara forces a defiant smirk at the old man but it is clear that is a ruse, a distraction at best. 

Oh. What happened to that sassy teen girl behavior? The Arbiter sarcastically jokes to himself like a schoolgirl, Cat got your tongue or something? Throw another peace sign and everything's going to be okay. 

"You will now need to lead a fake illusion team of wardens against a high A rank Elusive. A team of swordsmen and healers will accompany you." The lanky member narrates the rules of the test, "You will need to keep all members alive and standing and kill the Elusive."

 She takes a step back but nearly trips on her feet. She can't afford to let them down. Not now. 

The man's detached soft voice echoes through the room. "Their failure means death. Your death." The weight of those words crushes Kiara's chest. She forces herself to stand tall, to breathe deeply but they come out shallow. The air thickened, almost too thick to properly fill her lungs. 

She has to lead them. Keep them alive. Keep them standing, and ultimately kill the Elusive. Yet something weighed on her, something she couldn't shake off. The words continue to echo in her head, "Failure means death. Your death."

The wardens she was leading were fake. It's just a test. It's just a test yet it felt so much more real, with actual consequences, and stakes. 

I can't do this.

Kiara's legs tremble, and the pressure in the room feels like it is suffocating her. Every muscle in her body tenses and the palm around her katana becomes wobbly. She tried to step forward, but her feet were glued to the floor, paralyzed by the weight of the eyes above her.

The illusion of the swordsmen and healers starts to take shape around her, but Kiara couldn't focus on them. She knows she's supposed to be the leader, supposed to make decisions, guide them to victory—but her mind is in a freefall. Every move she makes feels like it could be the wrong one. 

Her breath comes in ragged gasps, her chest tightening.

In the next moment, it happens.

Her heart skips a beat.

The Elusive raises its arm, and in an instant, the ground shakes, the air thick with a sense of impending doom. The swordsmen around her begin to react, their movements stiff, confused. One of the healers stumbles.

Each one of her teammates starts moving on their own trying to eliminate the A-rank Elusive. Kiara tries to give orders on what to do but her throat closes in on itself. She froze in a paralyzing sense of inadequacy. 

A soft voice cuts through her panic but it barely registers in her mind. 

And that's when it happens. Kiara's mind collapses under the pressure. Her knees buckle, and for the briefest moment, she finds herself on the ground, staring at the distorted figures of her team, now transformed into something far more horrific.

Her breath comes faster now, panic overtaking her thoughts. I can't control this. I can't lead them. I can't protect them. She looks to the healer, but the healer's face is no longer someone she recognizes. This is wrong. This isn't right.

Her vision blurs, the Elusive's form becoming more grotesque with each passing second, the faces of her team slowly destroying them one by one with their forms exploding into a blue mist.

No… no!

Her chest tightens painfully, and a single tear slips down her cheek. She's not sure if it's from the overwhelming sense of guilt, fear, or the utter helplessness crashing over her all at once, but she knows—she's done.

And in that moment, everything collapses.

Kiara's mind collapses as she sinks into an abyss of despair and failure onto the ground. Her expression is blank and broken as her knees give up on her. Her legs fall onto the ground like a puppet being disconnected by its wires. 

I guess I went too far, The Arbiter rolls his eyes, disappointed in his actions, I actually expected her to do better. He leans his head to the rest of the High Council, their expressions dull and contemptuous of the whole scenario.

"Finish the job." The Arbiter says softly, disinterested and clawing at his fingernails, "Give her, her rank when you're done. She wasn't really that special anyway to have our full attention like that."

"Yes sir," the High Council says in unison, their voices layered and muffled on top of each other. Each of them nods their heads in affirmation. The Arbiter looks down on the scoring board- looking at Kiara's actual scoring through her many tests. 

Her actual scores for the earlier tests were much lower than what the council originally praised her for. Flipping through the pages, the Arbiter places his wrinkly finger on the final page. 

Name: Kiara Meitner. Age 16. Rank: D

Edward Meitner is actually correct for once, the Arbiter raises his eyebrow, somewhat amused by the turn of events. Honestly, I expected worse from what I saw today. 

The Arbiter's eye glances over to the council members finishing writing down their notes and scores on their scoreboards; he looks mildly confused and disappointed in their decisions. Must be pity points or something, I bet some of you want to pass her onto C rank to soothe your guilt. No way she made it that high. 

Kiara lays down on the floor, her eyes filled with tears. Each droplet falls onto the marbled floor. She couldn't contain herself yet a fueling rage burned inside her. She overhears the council members' words, their casual taunts that were once trying to psyche her out were not clawing and echoing in her head.

"Stop pretending to be a protector," one of the council members ridicules, "You've never known real loss- how can you expect to dedicate your life to this?" 

"You have been heavily unprepared," another member sneered, "You barely scratched the surface. Stop pretending to be something your not." 

The Arbiter looks disinterested at a defeated Edward, his movement unmoving and static. He chuckles to himself. Edward was too passive and afraid to help Kiara out. Zhang was too involved with his beliefs to stop anything. Her gang of misfits did not know what to do. 

"Your grandfather has failed to prepare you for what's out there." another voice hisses, "No matter how hard you try, you aren't prepared for the real world." 

Kiara's dwindling spiritual energy starts to flare up every so slightly when she hears the council member insult her grandfather- the only family she has left. Their words felt like knives to her very sense of worth. 

"He worked hard to keep you unseen from other wardens," another jeer, his eyes filled with cold condescension, "How can you possibly trust someone who's been keeping you invisible?"

Kiara's hands slowly form into fists. Her breathing becomes more erratic and quick. Their voices were building on top of each other, making her blood boil even more under her skin. 

"The world is designated by prey and hunter," the last taunt bites deep, "Without any drive or passion, you will be reduced to just prey to those stronger than you." The words pierce through Kiara pushing her to the edge. Her anger is at its boiling point. She slowly stops scraping her nails on the marble floor before slowly lifting her head, looking directly at the council members.

Zhang looks directly at the Arbiter, his gaze as sharp as steel, cutting through a mockery-filled room. Enough Zhang silently commands, Enough with the childish act.

The Arbiter, noticing Zhang's commanding gaze, rolls his eyes in the opposite direction. Standing up defiantly, he raises his arms up in the air, looking down at the council members next to him. "That's enough everyone." he commands, his tone dripping with mockery as if he was showing mercy to Kiara.

"You know, Kiara, it's always a shame when those who think they're helping only end up getting in the way," he began, his tone almost gentle, like a mentor speaking to a child who had just failed a lesson. "Your grandfather, for all his wisdom, can't shield you forever. He might try, but this world... this world doesn't work like that.

Kiara's heart skips a beat. The lights flicker ever so slightly. She could feel the air slightly getting heavy around her. The Arbiter smiles to himself suddenly his expression changes as he notices the shift in expression from Kiara, 

 What the? The Arbiter thinks to himself.

The torches start flickering all together and everyone in the area starts to feel a heavy-like sensation resting on their shoulders. The golden light of the torch's flame is swallowed by the weight of the vaulted ceiling, engulfing everyone in darkness. Kiara looks on at the High Council as a shadow is cast over her face showing only her deadpan stare towards them. 

The Arbiter narrows his eyes at the defiant and not mentally broken Kiara. He slowly puts his hands behind his back and his royal guards start slowly moving to protect him from harm's way. Arrogant child, The Arbiter thinks to himself.

Don't you dare insult my family, Kiara scornfully thinks to herself as her anger cuts through the silent air of the evaluation room.