Chapter 28: Heart of The Matter

Kai's POV

The morning after the rainstorm, everything felt different. The world was brighter, somehow—sharper, cleaner, as though the storm had washed away more than just the water. The tension between Haruka and me had shifted, but the weight of everything else I had been ignoring loomed over me.

I couldn't pretend it wasn't there anymore.

As I stepped into school that morning, the familiar hum of voices, footsteps, and lockers slamming shut felt distant. I found myself walking slower, letting my feet move on their own while my mind stayed locked in a battle between the warmth of last night and the icy fear that I still couldn't shake.

I had to face the truth. I had to deal with Chino.

Haruka was walking beside me, but even with her presence, something felt off.

She could tell, I knew that much. Her gaze was soft, but I could feel the question in her eyes. She didn't ask—Haruka knew when to let me take the lead, even when I wasn't sure where I was going.

But today, I couldn't hide from it anymore.

The problem with Chino had been growing, festering, in the background for so long that I could no longer ignore it. He had been a friend—maybe even more than that—once. But after everything that had happened, after everything we had been through together, I wasn't sure where we stood.

All I knew was that I couldn't let the silence between us stretch any longer.

I had been trying to avoid him for days now, but the time had come to face him.

I kept walking, my steps slower now as I approached the school courtyard where I knew he would be.

Haruka stopped beside me, her hand gently brushing against mine. She didn't need to say anything, but her touch grounded me, reminding me that I wasn't alone.

"You should talk to him, Kai," Haruka said quietly, her voice just above a whisper. "You can't keep running."

I didn't respond right away. The truth was, I wasn't sure if I could face Chino.

There was so much unresolved—so many words I hadn't said, so many feelings left unsaid between us. I had no idea how to fix this. How to fix us.

But I had to try. I couldn't just let everything fester, no matter how uncomfortable it was. Not if I wanted to move forward.

I nodded, taking a deep breath. "Yeah. You're right."

—-~

Chino's POV

I was sitting under the big tree by the school courtyard, my usual spot. It was funny, because even though I was here every day, I couldn't quite shake the feeling that I was waiting for something that would never come.

Kai hadn't said anything to me in days. He hadn't even looked at me the way he used to. The way he had when everything between us felt simple. When we used to laugh, share stupid jokes, and spend hours together after school, not thinking about anything except how much we meant to each other.

I had told myself I would be okay. I could handle the silence. After all, I was used to being on my own, right? But every time I saw him in the halls, or when I heard his voice from a distance, my chest tightened, and the weight of everything I was avoiding hit me harder.

I couldn't keep pretending I wasn't hurt.

The worst part was that I knew he was avoiding me, too. I could see it in the way he walked past me, his eyes averted. The way his friends—the people he was closest to—kept their distance when I was around.

I hated this. I hated what had happened between us. I hated how easily everything had fallen apart without either of us saying anything about it.

I heard footsteps before I saw him. My heart leaped in my chest. I turned slowly, hoping my expression didn't betray the way I felt, but when I saw Kai standing there, it felt like everything else around us faded into the background.

He wasn't alone. Haruka was with him, of course.

I wasn't surprised.

I forced a smile, but even I knew how weak it was. "Kai."

He didn't say anything at first. Instead, he stood there for a long moment, looking down at the ground, before meeting my eyes. His expression was unreadable, but there was something different about him today. A weight, like he was carrying the world on his shoulders.

"Chino," he said, his voice quieter than usual. "Can we talk?"

I felt my heart beat a little faster, a mixture of anxiety and something else, something that felt too close to hope

. He had said my name like it still meant something to him. And that was enough to make me hold my breath.

I nodded slowly, trying to keep my voice even. "Of course."

—-~

Kai's POV

I didn't know how to start. I had spent days running from the conversation we needed to have, and now that the moment was here, the words were stuck in my throat. How could I possibly explain what had happened? How could I fix this mess?

Chino had always been there, a constant in my life, but that had started to change when things between us grew complicated. I had been avoiding him, pushing him away, but now I realized it was because I had been afraid. Afraid of what I might lose. Afraid of what I couldn't control.

We sat down under the tree, and I felt the weight of the silence between us press on me, heavier than anything I had ever felt. The words I had rehearsed in my mind felt inadequate, too small for the storm that had been brewing between us.

"I don't know where to start," I finally said, breaking the silence.

Chino looked at me, his expression still, but there was a flicker of emotion in his eyes. He was trying to keep it together, but I could see it—the hurt, the confusion, the things he wanted to say but hadn't.

"You don't have to have all the answers right now," Chino said, his voice soft but firm. "But you need to say something. You've been shutting me out, Kai. And I can't keep pretending it's not happening."

His words cut through me like a knife. It was like he had been waiting for this moment, too, holding on to whatever fragments of hope we had left. And in that moment, I knew how much I had taken him for granted. How much I had been unwilling to face the truth.

"I'm sorry," I said, my voice thick. "I didn't know how to deal with everything that was happening. I didn't know how to fix what was broken between us."

Chino let out a breath, his shoulders sagging slightly as if a weight had been lifted. "Kai, you don't have to fix everything. We can't just pretend like things didn't happen. But we also can't keep ignoring them."

"I know," I said quietly. "I don't want to keep ignoring you, Chino. I've been scared of what would happen if I faced it. I've been scared of losing you."

His gaze softened. "You never lost me, Kai. But you can't keep hiding from me.

You can't keep hiding from yourself. It's not healthy."

I looked down, my hands trembling slightly. "I don't want to lose you. But I'm not the same person I was when we first met. I've changed, and I don't know if I can go back to being the person you wanted me to be."

He was quiet for a long time, studying my face as if trying to figure out what was going on in my head. "I don't need you to go back, Kai. I just need you to be honest. With me. And with yourself."

I didn't know what to say to that. The truth was, I wasn't sure what I wanted anymore. I didn't know if things between us could ever go back to what they were. But what I did know was that I couldn't keep pretending that everything was fine. Not when it wasn't.

"I've been running from the truth," I admitted. "I've been afraid of it. But I'm tired of running."

I felt a lump form in my throat, but I nodded slowly, the weight of everything suddenly feeling just a little bit lighter.

There was still so much we needed to work through, but for the first time in a long time, I felt like I was facing it head-on.

Not because I had all the answers. But because I was ready to start searching for them.