Decision

"Sorry, you can't kill him," Arian tried as friendly as possible.

"Why? Because he is a human?" Sublimus seemed actually curious.

"He is a guard and officially under my father's command. I can't judge over his life or death. Only my father, the emperor, can sentence him to death."

Arian tried not to think of the fact that while he would need to explain executing a knight, a mere "He didn't follow my commands" would suffice, and no one would investigate the case further. He was too afraid, Sublimus would be able to somehow read his thoughts through their connection and realize Arian was lying.

Well, not lying, it wasn't entirely wrong, but Arian left a chunk of the truth out.

Luckily, Sublimus seemed satisfied with the answer. He nodded in agreement.

"Very good. For a moment, I thought you didn't have any humanity in you. Maybe you're not so bad, after all."

Then the beast turned around, heading for the exit again.

Arian was perplexed. "What- what does that mean?!", he stuttered. "And where do you think you're going?"

Sublimus made a noise that sounded like a sigh. "I'm tired. I want to sleep."

"What? But you did barely anything. And you had the whole night to sleep!" Arian protested.

When he didn't get an answer, he tried to pry into their connection again. This time, he was more forceful; he wasn't just looking for Sublimus' feelings; he pressed his mind into their connection, using as much force as he could.

To his surprise, this time, he got something out of it. "The guards are so loud in the night, when they play cards, it's hard for me to get any sleep," Sublimus added, like it was an afterthought.

Because it sounded so faded in his mind, Arian suspected he wasn't supposed to hear that. Still, it was a bit too good for Arian to be able to get into Sublimus' mind so easily. After all, they barely knew each other.

Arian suspected, Sublimes had just forgotten to close off the link between their minds. Maybe this powerful beast needed time to adjust to the bond as well.

Arian hadn't thought about this yet. And neither would he now. He had a more pressing matter.

What's with the guards playing cards while on duty? Arian felt enraged. How dare they be so careless!

He shot a cold glance at the guards patrolling the entrance to the Arena. They had already shivered under Sublimus' gaze, but now, that their prince seemed to fixate on them as well, they even grew stiffer.

The one who only recently got back to his feet after Sublimus had pressed him to the ground even shivered slightly.

They couldn't hear his conversation with Shublimus, since it all happened in Arian's head, but they realized something was wrong.

Even though Arian wore a veil, they realized he was staring at them.

After a short moment of uncomfortable silence, one knight was bold enough to speak out. "My- my prince, is something the matter?"

"I've heard you are not taking your job very seriously. That is not acceptable. Therefore, I will punish each of you guards with ten hits on the back."

"Didn't you just say you can't hurt them?", Sublimus immediately inquired mentally.

"I said I can't kill them. I can punish them as much as I like."

"But..." Arian couldn't focus on Sublimus' response, because the brave guard, who thought he could speak out infront of the prince, had something to protest against.

"But I wasn't even the one who was on duty during the night, I..."

"That doesn't matter", Arain interrupted him. "It's probably for the best that you all get a reminder of taking your work seriously. Three months in battle, and you guys think the rules of the palace don't apply to you anymore. Be glad I'm the one who's punishing you and not my father. The emperor would execute you for failing in your duty. All of you."

"So you just hit them?" Arian was surprised when he realized Sublimus sounded disappointed.

Shouldn't he be happy Arian had chosen such a mild punishment?

With a smile on his lips, Arian immediately reconsidered.

"Well, thinking about it... My beast seems disappointed with my generous decision. So I figure I will give you all a salary reduction as well. Half the pay for half a year..."

He looked at Sublimus, who stared at him with wide eyes. The beast didn't look satisfied.

"No, let's make it one year. Half the pay for one year." Arian paused and looked at all the guards one by one.

"My decision is final."

"Oh...", his qilin sighed in the back of his mind.

Then, he suddenly turned around and leaped at the rabbit. Arian didn't understand what had caused this behavior. Looking back now, he still did not understand why Sublimus made that decision so suddenly, after protesting so hard not to kill the rabbit only minutes before that.

All he knew was that after this day, Sublimes never hesitated when Arian wanted him to kill someone or hurt someone.

He followed Arian's commands willingly, and Arian was very pleased with the development.

He always felt he had a strong protector by his side.

Only now, years later, he regretted changing the behavior of his ally so drastically.

But well, it was all too late now.

He had done much wrong. Too much. Befriended the wrong people, trusted in the wrong people... and probably bonded with the wrong beast, as well.

He should never have tried to change one's nature. Instead, he should have looked for a beast that naturally fitted his nature.

But something like this was hard. After all, Arian had an affinity for the demesnes life, mind, and water. Most beasts belonging to these demesnes were rather civil and peaceful.

If he wanted a beast for war, he would have to bond a beast of fire, but they were said to be rather dull...

Except for his father's phoenix, there was no breed in the fire demesne that garnered his interest.

Beasts belonging to air and earth never felt quite right for Arian, as well.

And the unholy beasts, well, bonding with them meant execution for royalty and nobles alike.

Rarely was a beast-tamer bonded to an unholy beast tolerated in society.

These were the beasts, the empire went to war against.

Not something one should bond.

So really, Arian had no other choice.

He had done the best he could. He had tried to give his beast the best life he could offer.

All for this... All for nothing.

All for him to get bitten and bitten again by his former beast.

Arian felt dizzy and numb.

He had experienced so much pain, he didn't feel anything anymore.

He just wanted the world to stop, but of course, it didn't.

Instead, he felt how Sublimus shook him again. How his head hit the rocks, it lay between, again and again- strong enough to hurt, not strong enough to unalive him.

It was all so unfair.

Make it fast, make it fast, make it fast.

Make it all go away. I want it to STOP!

Arian tried to flee into his thoughts again, into his memory, where nothing could hurt him.

To the moment when Sublimus bit off the head of the rabbit, and Arian felt as proud as he never had before.

He was happy, had been happy back then.

Arian wanted to drown in that memory, until he remembered that after Sublimus finished off the rabbit, his closest advisor and deputy at that time came up to him and advised him to reconsider his punishment.

The memory of that guy's face almost hurt as much as Sublimus' bites.

It catapulted Arian back into reality and prevented him from returning to the safe space of his mind again.

After all, said advisor and deputy was his former best friend, the one who ultimately turned Arian paraplegic.

The hatred Arian felt for this person was as strong as the day he betrayed the prince.

Even now, a cold shower of fury ran through Arian's body.

He was the one who put him in that helpless situation in the first place.

Arian had done so much for that man, who originally was a commoner.

And yet, Arian lay here, ready to die, just because of that stupid guy, who had taken all purpose from him.

Because of that fake friend, Arian lost his position as crown prince, his influence at court, and his command over a fraction of the royal army; he had no purpose left in life. No one needed him anymore.

Well, except the Akai-Dezato Academy. They needed help.

They were his only purpose, and for the last weeks, Arian had clung onto that.

Though losing all his powers left him limited in his options for help, he had been determined to do something.

Even though helping the Akai-Dezato Academy was basically no purpose compared to being the crown prince or leading an army into war- it was still something. It had to be something.

For once, Arian chose to believe it wasn't worthless. After all, there was the desire in him to proof everyone that even a parplegic cripple could do something.

Yes, he had wanted to die, even tried to unalive himself... but all of these things happened of his own accord. He wanted to choose his ending.

Going out like this... was just unbecoming for a prince, even for one bound to a wheelchair.

Arian balled his fists.

He had made a decision.