I am so tired already

Something's been gnawing at me lately.

The kind of thing that creeps into your mind when the monotony of life starts to weigh you down.

[Ahahahah! As expected of the S-ranked!]

[Praise to the Phantom Blade!]

[He's the dragon slayer! Make way, make way!]

The cheers and praises echoing around me felt hollow, like an endless loop of meaningless words.

These people—adoring, oblivious—had no idea of the blood, sweat, and tears I'd shed to reach this point.

It's exhausting.

Ten years. I've spent an entire decade as an adventurer in this world, a world I never chose to come to. How old am I now? Twenty-five. Single. Unmarried. And completely burned out.

When I started this journey, I had dreams, hopes, a sense of purpose. But those dreams shattered when I realized what it truly meant to stand at the peak as an S-ranked adventurer.

It's empty. It's only like an empty seat that needs to be filled without any significant purpose other than...fame.

The only way to reach S-rank is to accomplish something so monumental it shakes the entire nation or to be blessed with the title of hero. And me? I wasn't summoned here as a hero. I wasn't greeted by a radiant princess or a wise old sage. No, I was thrown into this world unceremoniously, left to fend for myself against its harsh, unforgiving wilderness.

[I think I'll retire] 

I muttered absentmindedly, polishing my magic sword with a cloth wet with polishing oil.

The room went silent. The lively chatter of adventurers halted as if someone had cast a freeze spell. All eyes turned to me, their expressions a mix of disbelief and confusion.

Ten years of relentless quests, and two years since I earned the S-rank. My name is already etched into history as one of the strongest mortals alive, a figure so renowned that even the current summoned hero stands in my shadow.

[You—you're joking, right?] (Merlina)

Merlina, the guild master, was in the room. She'd been loitering near the corner, half-buried in a mountain of paperwork.

Now, her face was pale, her voice trembling as she stared at me.

[I wish I was joking]

[You can't!] (Merlina)

Her response was immediate, panicked, and loud enough to draw more attention. 

For someone who's only 28, she carried the stress of someone twice her age. Wrinkles were already starting to line her young face, and I was sure my announcement had just shaved a few more years off her life expectancy.

This woman is someone who I am also indebted for since my arrival at this city. She was the person that took me into being an adventurer since she noted that I had talent.

[Why not? It's not like I'm the only S-rank adventurer here. You've got the Necromancer, the Fairy King, Heaven's Messenger, and Hell Whip, all stationed in this city's guild branch. They're more than capable.]

Each name I listed belonged to someone just as powerful, if not more, than me. The guild wasn't lacking in talent in many ways.

[It doesn't matter! I can't allow it! I just... I can't!] (Merlina)

Her voice cracked as she dropped to the ground in a dogeza, her disheveled hair falling around her face.

[Hey now, I've been doing this job for ten years without complaint. How is it fair that I don't get a retirement option?]

[Well...] (Merlina)

She hesitated, searching for an answer, but none came. Her lips quivered as she stared at me, clearly torn between her duties and her loyalty to me.

The guild hall went deadening silent, the usual clamor of adventurers and rowdy banter replaced by the weight of my words.

[Well... you see...] (Merlina)

Merlina's voice trailed off as she avoided my gaze, her hands clenching tightly in front of her.

I could almost hear the gears turning in her head as she struggled to come up with a convincing argument to keep me around.

[You're too valuable to lose, Tom. The guild needs you. The people need you.] (Merlina)

Her tone was earnest, but the desperation behind it was hard to ignore. I sighed, setting the polished magic sword down on the table with a soft clink.

[Merlina, I'm not a tool to be used until I break. I've done more than enough for this guild, this city, and this world. I just... I want to live for myself now. Is that so hard to understand?]

[But-] (Merlina)

Her lips parted as if to argue, but no words came out. For a brief moment, I thought I had finally broken through her stubbornness, but then she surprised me.

[You say that, but you're still you. The man who can't sit still while others are suffering. Even if you retire, what happens when trouble finds its way to your doorstep? Will you really just sit back and watch?]

Her words struck a nerve. She knew me too well. I could only chuckled silently.

[I don't know, Merlina. Maybe I'll deal with it. Maybe I won't. But I can't keep living this life—this endless grind of missions and monster slaying—just because people expect me to. I've earned the right to choose how I spend my days.]

A few murmurs rippled through the room, adventurers whispering among themselves. Some looked at me with awe, others with pity.

[Tom...] (Merlina)

Her voice softened, and she slumped back in her chair, defeated. For all her protests, she couldn't deny the truth in my words.

[Where will you go?] (Merlina)

I smiled faintly, the image of that peaceful countryside filling my mind again.

[I don't know the name of the village, but it's near the lake surrounded by golden fields. I passed through it once years ago, during a mission. It was... quiet. Peaceful. I think I could make a life there.]

Merlina sighed deeply, rubbing her temples.

[You're impossible, you know that? Fine. If you're so determined to leave, at least promise me you'll write once in a while. And don't even think about disappearing off the face of the earth. The guild still has to send your pension, after all] (Merlina)

I chuckled, the tension in the room easing slightly.

[Deal]

[But don't think this means I approve. If something happens and we need you back...] (Merlina)

[You'll send a letter. I get it]

She nodded reluctantly, though her expression was still laced with worry.

[One last thing] (Merlina)

Her tone turned sharp, catching me off guard.

[You will attend your retirement ceremony. No skipping out like you did with the last guild banquet.] (Merlina)

I groaned, running a hand through my hair.

[Do I have to?] I hate way too much attention

[Yes. If you're going to leave us, at least let the guild give you a proper send-off. It's the least you can do.] (Merlina)

I could tell there was no arguing with her on this.

[Fine, but only if it's small. No grand speeches or parades.]

[No promises.] (Merlina)

As the room slowly returned to its usual bustle, I leaned back in my chair, feeling a strange mix of relief and apprehension. My days as an adventurer were coming to an end, but what lay ahead was still uncertain.

For the first time in a decade, I felt something other than boredom—a flicker of excitement for what the future might hold.