Chapter 9. Genius Plan (1)

Author's note: This morning, this morning, a fragment of memory lit up my mind, vivid and unbidden. I recognized it instantly... yet it left me shaken in a way I never expected. All this time, I believed Ronan Vercetti was my name—my truth. But now, it seems Lee Dohyun was the original. How could this be? For three years, I've heard people call me by that name—Lee Dohyun. Not Ronan Vercetti. Was it because I clung too tightly to that fleeting memory? I've been living in the shadow of the past, bound to the identity of Lee Dohyun. Perhaps that's why, even as Ronan Vercetti, I hear his name echoing within me. You, the person who are currently reading these words, do you remember who I was? Are you the person I think you are?

It's 9 o clock on a Saturday.

The soft glow of a vintage lamp bathed my desk in faint light. Its ornate base, adorned with intricate metallic details, stood out against the clutter of papers and books. Beads and fringes hung delicately from the lamp's edge, catching the light with every subtle shift of the air.I sat before my laptop, staring at its screen, words churned in my mind as I tried to find the right words to build my sentence, countless sentences being erased while new ones were being told. My hands hovered over the keyboard, I am Ronan Vercetti who was once Lee Dohyun.

Sunday, June 1st.

These days, I spend a lot of time trying to write a single chapter... Day after day my memories of that time are slowly fading away, like a smell of an old book- faint and dusty. If it weren't for this story, Ronan Vercetti would probably have forgotten who I was by now.

Every time things got messy, when his self-esteem dropped, being chained to his thoughts slowly forgetting who he is, he'd read this very story "To Save and Be Saved."- his very own story, The one Ronan Vercetti wrote with his own hands, each word carved from his previous life, a reminder how his life was then... there was once a person who was very dear to him - the evidence of his struggles when everything felt uncertain. A mirror reflecting his inner struggles, journey and his path. 

I wonder, Am I the protagonist of this story?

Ronan's story spread through the world, eventually stepping on the path of 'fame'. 

However, Ronan felt guilty... Because he never intended for this story to become well known, all he ever wanted was... I cannot remember. Why am I even writing?

Authors from all corners, some celebrated for their masterpieces, reached out to him. Some were kind, others less so. "How dare you insult us writers!" they said. "Do you think you can simply write your life and call it greatness?"

"Among authors, they all have their own pride, "Writer's Pride." If so, what was Ronan's pride? There was a reader, a very big fan of Ronan under the username of 'LiteralReaderboy9" often left thoughtful comments. "Dear Author, I've been reading your stories for a while now. But your style is unsteady, sometimes I feel you within the text but sometimes you feel like a different person... Are there anyone writing besides you?"

Perhaps that was his 'writer's pride.' A writer who hasn't developed his own style, someone who has been stealing other author's style and mixing them. An author who cannot even remember his own story. Those facts alone were pressuring him. 

||||| I wonder, how does my life look like in others' eyes? ||||||

"Why am I even writing?" I muttered in my mouth. 

I slowly scrolled up, reading what I had written, The Author's Note. A note containing author's emotions, opinions and their impossible desires- My note. Chapter one to chapter two and so on until here, draft of 'Chapter 9'.

That's right, I was once a person called 'Lee Dohyun' and I had just remembered it just now. I am writing a story shaped by my life, hoping a for certain people to read it.

Knock! knock!

A sharp knock jolted me from my thoughts. "I'm coming in," a familiar voice called out, carrying both remorse and disappointment.

Ultimately, Ronan the reason of his arrival.

The door creaked open. Against the sunlight stood a silhouette, slowly stepping forward until Seojun's figure emerged, dressed in the suit he wore during our first encounter.

"Ronan, you know what you have done, don't you?" Seojun stood menacingly, his empty gaze weighted heavy on him. 

"What have I done?" 

Seojun stood still, clenching his fist before he finally lost it. "Don't play dumb you fool! You broke the rules by serializing that book. Did you ever think what would happen if those who know your past somehow stumbled upon it?" Seojun paused, taking a deep breath, trying his best to suppress his anger. "Fortunately, none of them have discovered your book yet. So, I'll give you a second chance if you take it down right now."

Ronan couldn't help but grin like an idiot, because all his actions were planned from the beginning. He was indeed responsible for breaking the rules, he was the culprit who came up with this crazy idea. 

"I've always suspected you can read my mind. So, can you really do it?" I raised my head, defying his gaze with mine. 

"I see. So, you did plan all of this." his tone filled with disappointment was palpable. "

I have to admit, I am impressed by your courage and your creativity. No one else have ever achieved what you have done. But now, what's your answer? Will you take it down or not...."

"You know what they say, 'You should always be cautions no matter what.' is really true."

Around the release of the fifth chapter, Ronan Vercetti came up with a plan.

"I know I am breaking the rules. However, I will continue to serialize it. Even if they everyone's memory, I will somehow find my way back to this story, I will remember it all back..... I will release myself from this contract, I will return home....."

"I am slowly losing my memories, but that may be a good thing. In case they can read my mind, I'll forget about this plan until I read TSBS again."

Ronan continued to release more chapters of his book, forgetting and remembering those moments, his motive many times. His motive was delusional, as unreal as a dream that ends in an instant- a gamble with almost zero percent success rate. 

He was at the edge of losing his sanity many times, but he overcame each one, imagining his little sister and a certain novel. Sa-rang and 'Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint.' Every time he lost his sanity, characters from that novel would come to rescue him. 

A person who was actually a coward, the most ordinary person among his companions, yet he never hesitated to sacrifice himself for them. Ronan's comfort character, No.. his comfort person. 

Nostalgic white coat fluttering in the wind in his dreams, pale and ordinary, with sharp, perceptive eyes carrying a thoughtful expression, seemingly imagining the whole universe. 

They stood next to each other in the vast snowfield, letters floating around like fallen leaves, the light of full moon peeking through the clouds. Their mouth slowly opening at the same time, "I am Yoo Joonghyuk." a magical phrase that gave them the courage, the energy required to overcome any obstacle. "I will kill you if you use my name like that." the man himself, the one who carried the tragedy of countless worlds on his back, eventually seeing the end of the world standing behind them. "Do you always have to be so grumpy?" another white coat fluttered, the woman who had spent 13 years writing for her only reader's sake. 

Ronan Vercetti who always sacrificed his wishes to meet others' expectations, was saved by them each and every time. 

|||| Every writer was once a reader. |||||

Right, before he became Ronan Vercetti, before he became the author of 'To Save and Be Saved' he was once a webnovel reader.

"Ronan! Will you take it down or not!" Seojun's inpatient voice snapped me back, pulling me down my neck. His face was tight with expectations.

And I was about to break free from his expectations, this damn pledge. "Don't call me Ronan, I am Lee Dohyun you son of a b****."

"DAMMIT RONAN!" his eyebrows twitching, enraged Seojun began walking toward me. 

Our conflicted emotions froze us both in place as the weight of unspoken words lingered between us.

I grinned, "Hurry up and erase our memories bastard." I taunted.

Seojun's gaze pierced through me, tweaking from his emotions. Desperate and hesitant, his hand trembling midair, slowly snapping his fingers.