Chapter 3: Exploring options

"I am getting married," I yelled and closed my mouth immediately. How did I let that slip? He hasn't even called me. I don't even know if he has accepted the proposal or not, but here I am blabbing and telling my parents about the so-called marriage to a strange man who could be a serial killer or a murderer, maybe one of my parents' enemies.

"Xiao Ming," my mom called, and I snapped out of whatever was going on in my head. "Yes, mom," I answered. "What did you just say?" Dad asked. I took three quick breaths and turned to him. "Yes, Dad," I whined. "I did not approve of any man…" I cut him off before he could finish. I didn't want him asking me questions that had no answers. "Yes, Dad, you do not know him because I did this for myself, and I picked a husband who loves me and not someone who is after my family business. I do not want a gold-digging, backstabber. I am going to die soon, so I might as well make decisions for myself in the next 365 days. It won't kill you not to have so much control over everything in my life, will it?" I asked. I was probably taking this whole thing to the next level.

I sighed and took in the atmosphere. It was tense. I looked at Mom's shocked face and Dad's unamused state and forced a smile. "I will set a date with him, and I am sure you will love him. Trust me for once, Dad. I swear I didn't make a mistake," I said and dashed up the stairs before anyone could stop me. I really hope I am not making a mistake.

My phone felt a little too heavy for my sweaty palms. I dropped the phone on my bed and stared at the screen, anxiously waiting for it to ring or even a text. I was not asking for too much, was I?

Every single beep or ring made my heart skip. I would rush to my phone only to find a message from the law firm or a call from a possible client. I loved being a lawyer, but sometimes I wished I was given a chance to grow up like everyone else. But here I was, holding the title of being the youngest female lawyer in [insert country]. The hype was worth it, but no one actually knows what I went through to get there. From being homeschooled all my life to being constantly watched in university, it's funny how I thought I was going to be free in university, but it was just another endless controlling moment. I was taken to school and brought back home immediately after I was done with my classes for the day, and never allowed to mingle except for business purposes.

I am tired of that life. I never got to be a child, never got to live the way I want, make mistakes, and learn from them or not. I could not die knowing I never got the life I wanted, but everything depended on a man I was paying to marry me, and I don't even…

My phone ringing interrupted my thoughts. It was another strange number. What if it was another client? I crossed my fingers and reached for my phone. I was about to answer the phone when I lost connection, and my phone went off.

In a panic, I stood up to look for my charger, but the energy was too much for my weak body. My muscles got weak, and I held onto my headboard. It stopped me from falling. "You have one year. There's no rush to die," I said to myself. I took deep breaths and calmly tried to look for my charger, but I couldn't find it. "Why is life messing with me now? I can't afford a dead phone. I always know where my charger is when I need it, but now that I need it, it decides to grow wings and fly." I should be calm and not worry too much. It is somewhere open, somewhere I never thought it would be. I searched my bags and everywhere it could be, but I didn't find it.

Searching for things when you need them can be frustrating. I tried retracing my steps to the last time I was home, but that was a week ago, and the stupid charger could be anywhere. Taking a deep breath, I decided to arrange my messy room. You never know how messy your room is until you shift things around while deciding to look for a freaking charger. I cleared my table and made my bed, but I still couldn't find my charger. I gave up the search and ran to my parents' room. Picking up her charger, I ran to my room. I connected my phone and...