Chapter 67

The next morning, I skipped patrol. I needed answers, or at least a direction to start looking for them. I called Tristain, my therapist.

"Anos? Everything okay?" His voice was laced with concern. He knew my voice, he knew when things were off.

"Not really. I need to talk."

"Come over. Now."

Tristain's office was a sanctuary. Soft lighting, calming music, and the comforting scent of lavender. "So," he began, after I'd taken a seat, "what's going on?"

I told him everything. The burning city, the meeting with Dabi and Shigaraki, rescuing Akira, and Rosaline… everything. I held nothing back. The words came out in a torrent, a dam bursting after being held for too long.

Tristain listened patiently, his gaze unwavering. When I finally finished, he sat in silence for a moment, absorbing my words. "That's a lot to process, Anos. Let's start with Rosaline. How did her touch make you feel?"

"Dirty. Violated. Like she…" I trailed off, unable to articulate the feeling.

"Like she took something from you?" Tristain offered.

"Yeah. Exactly."

"That's a common reaction to trauma, Anos. It sounds like what happened with Rosaline triggered something inside you. A sense of vulnerability, a feeling of being out of control."

"But I killed her! I avenged Akira! I was in control!" I protested.

"Sometimes, the act of taking a life, even in self-defense, can be traumatic. It can challenge your beliefs about yourself, about the world. You're a hero, Anos. You're used to saving lives, not taking them."

He had a point. I'd never considered that. Hell, I've always been Superman. Invincible. Unkillable. Now I'm second guessing everything.

We spent the next hour dissecting my feelings. Tristain helped me unpack the trauma, to understand the root of my panic. He reminded me of my strength, not just physical, but emotional as well.

"What about Akira?" I asked. "I can't seem to get her out of my head."

"You feel responsible for her," Tristain said. "You feel a need to protect her."

"Yeah. Maybe it's because I see myself in her. A lost soul, searching for a place to belong."

"And how does that make you feel?"

"It makes me want to help her. To give her the one thing I always wanted: someone to understand."

Tristain smiled. "That's a noble desire, Anos. But remember, you can't save everyone. You can only offer them support, guidance, and the space to heal."

By the time I left Tristain's office, the weight on my shoulders had lessened. The darkness hadn't completely disappeared, but it had receded, allowing a sliver of light to shine through. I knew I had a lot of work to do, but for the first time in days, I felt like I was heading in the right direction.

I visited Akira later that day. She was staying at a safe house provided by the police. She was surprised to see me.

"Hey," I said, a nervous shuffle in my feet. "How are you holding up?"

"Better," she said, a small smile gracing her lips. "Thanks to you."

We sat in silence for a moment, the unspoken words hanging in the air. I wanted to tell her that everything would be okay. But I knew that wasn't true. Life was messy, unpredictable. All I could offer was my presence, my support.

"If you ever need anything," I said, "anything at all, don't hesitate to call me."

She nodded, her eyes filled with gratitude. "I will."

As I turned to leave, she stopped me. "Anos," she said softly. "Thank you. For saving me."

I smiled and shook my head "No problem"

Her words were a balm to my soul, a confirmation that even in the darkest of times, a small act of kindness could make a difference. And maybe, just maybe, I wasn't such a bad person after all.