Move on°

Mama died on my 18th birthday.

I didn't grieve.

I didn't want to.

I couldn't bring myself to.

If I did, then it means I've lost.

Lost to the realization that she was dead.

She wouldn't want that.

I resorted to indulging myself in my studies to escape the reality that I had lost the only thing that made my life feel complete.

My institute mates introduced me to gaming. I liked gaming. So much time would pass without my knowledge and it made me barely think about anything else.

One day I was persuaded into playing an online multiplayer game called "Lumi Warfare". It was a third person shooter game. I didn't like it at first because of the violent themes but it was fun talking to other elves across the globe.

We had guilds, created linked group chats. It was fun.

Hi, my name is Faelan. I'm from the Chompers Guild.

I should have ignored your message.

It started from playing together, to talking on the phone, to exchanging pictures and to picking a date to meet up.

I nervously tucked my hair behind my ears as I stepped into the whale train. We had planned to meet in the City of High Elves. A cafe was our agreed spot to visit.

I caught my reflection in the watery screen. I had grown my hair out and it was currently curled in waves around my shoulders and back. I had on black suit pants and a red knitted sweater with a Calico Flopper knitted unto it. A cream scarf was wrapped around my neck.

I feel overdressed.

The clothes are not complementing my skin

Do I look fat in it?

Should I have chopped off my hair instead?

The curls feel too much.

Perhaps I should turn around and head back home and lie to Faelan that I fell sick out of the blue.

My stomach felt squishy as I looked down at my feet.

I wonder what he looks like? He sounded like a really young man, what if he was an highschooler? I could get arrested for engaging with a minor!

Wait what if he wasn't the person in the pictures he had been sending to me?!

Then it occurred to me that we never spoke about our ages. I will ask him when I see him.

The train halted and I got off. Staring at dug-in platform I puked into 4 years ago. I rubbed my hands together before heading into the City.

My phone buzzed.

It was Faelan. He sent a sticker.

It was an animated nervous flopper.

I giggled and boarded a taxi. Giving the chauffeur my desired address, I sat back and began daydreaming about our meetup.

I wonder what clothes he would wear

What do you think he would smell like?

How tall is he really?

Will he think I'm weird?

Will he think I'm overdressed?

Do I look desperate?

Is my hair too much?

Opening my handbag I pulled out a small mirror. Looking at my reflection I sighed.

My hair doesn't match my skin, I should have dyed it.

The chauffeur tapped the space next to me to get my attention,

"We are here ma'am"

I gasped and apologized for spacing out

He chuckled and waved me goodbye as he drove off.

I stood in front of the huge Cafe. I suddenly felt sweaty, my legs felt heavy and my hands felt clammy. I didn't know what to do.

I spun around, choosing to go back home, and slammed myself into someone. A solid mass of Elf.

I looked up to apologize but my mouth hung open.

"Hello Lora"