Chapter 91

Julian's POV

It happened again. I coughed up blood again. I stared at my blood-stained hands in fear. I don't know what is happening to me. I don't understand, but something is really wrong with me. I opened the tap and washed away the blood. It happened over a month ago. I thought I got hurt somehow, but that was not it. Something is happening and j don't know what it is.

I showered and got ready. The situation is getting worse. I think Xavier has changed. He has lost his edge and I fear that it is going to ruin everything. I knew that this would happen, but I thought he would get over it. He had let that woman get to his head. He can't think about anything but her. I don't know what his obsession with her is.

All he should think about is his hatred for her, but I think he wants to go easy on her. He isn't doing anything about her. Well, I'm not like him. Unlike him, I hate her and have no attachment to her. I have always hated her and now, more than ever, I want to see her destroyed. I will make sure of it. I will make her pay for everything she did. I have lived for that all these wretched years. I won't stop until I do that. With or without Xavier's support, I will make sure to kill her with my own hands.

I went to Sandra's hideout to see the boy. I went inside and I found the baby crying. Sandra was just sitting and staring at nothing. She looked like absolute shit.

" Sandra, what the hell are you doing?! Can't you hear the baby crying?"

I have been coming here to keep tabs on her. She keeps disobeying me and walking freely. That is risky for those people looking for her. She can't be discovered before time.

Sandra looked out of it, and she didn't make a move to acknowledge my presence or even what I said. I nodded at her, and finally she snapped out of it.

She gasped, startled after finally noticing my presence.

" Oh my god! What are you doing here? How did you come in?"

" I came in through the door," I said as a matter of fact.

" Pull yourself together. Your child is crying his head off, and you are just sitting there lost in god now what land."

She frantically picked up her child and started to pacify him.

I find kids to be annoying. For a lot of reasons. Even though he is my offspring, I oddly don't feel attached to him. We might be immortal, but we can still produce offspring. Don't ask me how, we just can. I've never tried to have a child of my own after I lost my mate. I wasn't interested in that" happy family" sentimental bullshit. For the time I've lived, it just seemed so meaningless.

It was my stupid mistake that ended with Sandra getting pregnant. When she told me, I wasn't happy, nor angry. I didn't feel anything. I told Sandra to get rid of it, but she stubbornly wanted to keep the baby in hopes that she would melt my heart and use the baby to get closer to me. Unfortunately for her, I wasn't a naive, soft-hearted weakling.

" I'm so sorry baby. Mommy is so sorry. Please calm down, please ". She pleaded with the child, who was finally calming down.

He soon fell asleep, and she went to put him down.

She came back and threw herself on the couch. Motherhood was working a number. She looked haggard and worn out. She should just have listened to me when she had a chance.

" I hope you haven't been sneaking out of the house without my permission."

" Why would I sneak out of the house if I had your permission? I have been here for over a month without going out, as you said. I didn't go anywhere. Are you happy!" She snapped at me. I refrained from chocking her. What's the point of doing anything to her? She already looks like she is going through hell.

After a while, she says," Do you not feel anything? Not even sorry for me?" She was still seated in the couch with her back facing me.

" What do you mean?"

I know where this is going, but I went along with it.

" Do you really not care about that child?" She turned to face with a weird expression on her face.

I sighed.

" We have been through this before, Sandra. I don't want that child, so it's yours alone. I told you to get rid of it, but you didn't want to, so it's not my problem."

Sbe scoffed.

" Yeah, you are right. I have heard that so many times before. I just can't understand how heartless you are. I get you refusing to like or love me, but denying or your own flesh abs blood? That's..."

She didn't complete her sentence.

She shook her head. " You know what, forget it. It's a waste of time talking to you. You just don't care."

She got up and was about to walk past me, but I grabbed her arms, stopping her.

" I don't know what the hell is going on with you, but I suggest you fucking get your act together. I won't be repeating myself to you. I don't know about that child. Kill me but I just don't. You know that, so stop throwing a tantrum about it and watch what you say to me. I won't be nice about it the next time."

I squeezed her arm to get the message across. She struggled to get her arm out of my hold. I let her go.

I could see that she was holding back her tears, but that didn't affect me.

I warned her when I started this thing with her. To never fall in love, but that's just what she did. Being kind about it will just give her false hope. My life has no room for love. That is just a fantasy.

" I heard you. Loud and clear." She walked away, and I left the house as well. She'll eventually get over me. It's life. No one gets everything they want in life. It's just the way it is.

I know that we'll do enough. Although I won't have everything I want in life, I'll make sure that I at least get what I desire the most from this life.