Grey Rabbit Go To Hell Trap

Zane led his mismatched team to an open field just before the forest. He moved with the flair of a stage magician, the corner of his mouth tugging into a smirk as he gestured toward the large, sheet-covered structure waiting in the middle of the clearing.

"Behold, gentlemen," Zane declared, gripping the edge of the bed sheets. With a flourish so practiced it felt almost natural, he yanked them away, letting the tattered fabric drift dramatically to the ground.

The three men stared in unison at the structure he had unveiled.

"A cage?" Ron asked, scratching his head.

"A cage, you say?" Zane echoed, clasping his hands behind his back and pacing like a lecturer. "Oh no, my dear Ron. This isn't just a cage. This is the brilliant version 2.0 of my Grey Rabbit Go To Hell Trap, or GRHT 2.0 for short." He paused for dramatic effect, letting the name sink in.

The three men blinked at him, unimpressed.

"It's a revolutionary invention," Zane pressed on, undeterred. "A pioneering idea! A trap with a wooden and steel frame combined to hold and trap those demonic rabbits from hell itself. As you might have noticed, one side of the cage is open. That's our baiting entrance. And those holes around the frame?" He gestured proudly at the openings spaced evenly along the sides. "Those are for you fine gentlemen to stab your hearts out with your knife spears!"

The group looked at each other, then at the cage. The idea seemed rough—very rough—but feasible enough to at least try.

"But, Lord," Tim piped up, his sharp eyes narrowing, "how are we going to lure the rabbits into the cage?"

Zane's grin widened. "Leave that to me. All you need to do is stay on guard and be ready to stab. You can manage that, right?"

Ron stepped forward, his broad chest puffing out with determination. "If it's for the village, I'll be sure to put my heart into it."

"Yes, yes, but don't get too carried away. My cage might not survive that much enthusiasm," Zane quipped, shooting Ron a pointed look.

Tim and Vlad exchanged glances before nodding as well. They didn't seem quite as eager as Ron, but Zane figured that was the best he'd get out of them.

"Young Lord," Vlad asked, gesturing to a large pile of hay nearby lined up perfectly in rows of two, and at the end of the line two separate stacks of hay hung by the tree, "what's all that for?"

Zane's grin turned sly. "Ah, I call it the Passage of Fire. But you'll just have to wait and see."

Sylphie, who had been silently observing, stepped forward. "Master, will you really be okay? I can go instead—"

"As I've told you before," Zane interrupted, his tone firm but not unkind, "it has to be me. You need to stay back and be ready to light the fire at my signal. Not a second late, understood?"

Sylphie hesitated, worry evident in her eyes, but she nodded. "Yes, Master."

"Good." Zane clapped his hands together, signaling to the group. "Alright, everyone, get into position!"

The men took their places around the cage, gripping their spears with varying degrees of confidence. Sylphie lingered for a moment longer, her gaze following Zane as he picked up the trap and began walking toward the forest's edge.

"Don't worry, Sylphie," Zane called over his shoulder. "I've got this. Probably."

Sylphie bit her lip but nodded, retreating to her assigned spot near the hay.

Zane took a deep breath as he approached the forest. The memory of those bloodthirsty rabbits and their screeches was still fresh in his mind, but he forced the nerves down.

"Alright, hell rabbits," he muttered to himself, tightening his grip on the trap. "Time for round two. Let's see if you're as clever as you think you are."

And with that, he disappeared into the trees, the weight of both the trap and the plan resting heavily on his shoulders.

For the first time in what felt like ages, Zane had a moment of solitude in the forest as he worked on setting the trap. Despite his usual carefree demeanor, a gnawing unease crept into his thoughts. He tied the final knot, taking a deep breath as he glanced around the darkening woods.

"It's really not like me to get all introspective," Zane muttered, shaking his head and letting out a self-deprecating chuckle. "What am I, some tortured poet? Please."

He crouched behind a nearby bush, waiting for his fluffy nemesis to show up. It didn't take long—soon enough, a single grey rabbit hopped into view. Its movements were light and deliberate, its twitching nose scanning the ground.

"There it is," Zane whispered. "Grab it, you adorable little nightmare. Grab your dear food!"

The rabbit pranced around the edges of the trap, sniffing cautiously but refusing to take the bait. Zane's hopeful grin began to falter. His lips twitched in annoyance as he watched the beast circle the trap, never stepping into it.

"Wait a minute," Zane muttered, his brain clicking into high gear. "Don't tell me…"

He remembered Sylphie's words about these beasts being intelligent—intelligent enough to work in packs. A cold realization washed over him.

"Shit," Zane groaned, slumping back against the bush. "If that's the case, then the whole plan is a spectacular failure…"

The thought of returning empty-handed—and worse, having to endure another serving of Sylphie's bark soup—made him shudder. He clenched his fists, determination hardening his expression.

"Nope. Not happening. I'd rather die… so be it."

Zane reached into his pocket, pulling out his last-minute invention: a crude but functional slingshot. With a quick motion, he loaded a small rock pellet and aimed at the rabbit.

"Bull's eye," he muttered as the pellet struck the rabbit squarely on its hindquarters, sending it hopping in panic.

Without missing a beat, Zane launched himself out of hiding and grabbed the startled rabbit by the scruff of its neck. It let out a terrifying shriek, its eyes glowing with fury.

"Oh, for the love of—shut up!" Zane shouted, clutching the rabbit tighter as its cries echoed through the forest.

And then he heard it—the unmistakable sound of dozens of pounding feet and piercing screeches.

"Oh, no," Zane muttered. "Oh, hell no."

Clutching the rabbit like a football, Zane bolted out of the forest at full speed, the deadly swarm of Grey Rabbits chasing after him. Their shrieks and pounding feet were like a wave of impending doom.

"Why do you hate me?!" Zane yelled, not daring to look back as he ran for his life.

When he burst out of the forest, Sylphie and the trio of villagers were already in position. They froze, staring at Zane, who looked like he'd just sprinted through the gates of hell.

"Get ready!" Zane shouted, hurling the rabbit into the trap with the precision of a pro quarterback. It landed inside with a startled thud, and Zane vaulted over the wall of hay, landing heavily on the other side, gasping for air.

The villagers and Sylphie snapped into action, their faces grim.

From the tree line emerged the rest of the swarm—a tidal wave of grey fur and glowing red eyes. The rabbits moved like a singular entity, a horrifying mass of rage and vengeance, barreling straight toward the cage through the narrow passage of hay.

"Not yet…" Zane whispered to Sylphie, who stood ready to ignite the hay with trembling hands.

The rabbits crashed into the cage, filling it in an instant, their shrieks deafening as they fought against the enclosure.

"Go!" Zane yelled to the trio.

Ron, Vlad, and Tim sprang into action, jabbing their knife-spears through the holes in the cage. Their movements were frantic but determined, sweat dripping down their faces as they stabbed again and again.

"Keep going!" Zane urged, standing up despite the terror gnawing at his stomach.

The swarm continued to pour into the cage, but more and more of the rabbits began spilling around it, climbing the hay walls. Sylphie's eyes darted to Zane in panic.

"Master?!"

"Not yet!" Zane barked, his eyes scanning the edge of the swarm. He needed to see it—the break in the wave, the end of the horde.

The rabbits clawed at the hay walls, their red eyes glaring down at the humans who had dared to fight back. Sylphie raised her hands, ready to light the hay, but Zane shook his head.

And then he saw it—a gap in the swarm, the end of their numbers.

"Now!" Zane roared.

Sylphie chanted quickly, and flames erupted along the passage of hay. 

The fire roared to life, the crackling flames sending waves of heat and smoke through the clearing. The rabbits, once an unstoppable tide of grey fury, screeched in panic as the wall of fire cut off their escape. Their path was now limited to one deadly choice: the cage.

Zane moved quickly, adrenaline coursing through his veins. He dashed to a nearby branch where a rope hung taut, securing a stack of hay suspended above the clearing. With his knife, he slashed the rope in one swift motion. The hay bale dropped to the ground with a heavy thud, closing the remaining exit. Almost immediately, the flames licked at the fresh fuel, igniting the hay into a blazing inferno.

The rabbits' screeches rose in pitch, their red eyes glowing with fear and desperation as they were funneled toward the cage. Inside, the mounting pile of bodies was a gruesome testament to the trio's relentless stabbing.

Even Zane, who was not easily impressed, found himself nodding in admiration. "Damn," he muttered, watching the trio work like a well-oiled murder machine. "Remind me never to piss you guys off."

Ron, the village's gentle giant, stabbed with surprising precision, his massive frame giving him a stamina Zane envied. Vlad, the embodiment of average, worked with mechanical efficiency, his expression blank but his spear struck steadily. Tim, with his wiry frame and menacing glare, jabbed with a ferocity that made it seem like he was working out some personal vendetta.

"Keep going!" Zane yelled over the chaos, his voice hoarse from the smoke and shouting. "Don't stop until the last one's down!"

The men grunted in acknowledgment, their focus unwavering as they drove their spears into the writhing mass of rabbits. Each stab was met with a screech, and the pile of bodies grew higher, the cage becoming a veritable mountain of fur and blood.

The rabbits outside the cage hesitated, their instincts warring with their fear of the fire and the trap. But their pack mentality pushed them forward, forcing them into the bottleneck. One by one, they surged into the cage, only to meet the same fate as their fallen comrades.

Zane wiped sweat from his brow, glancing at Sylphie, who was standing by the fire with her hands clasped tightly together. Her face was pale, her eyes wide as she watched the brutal scene unfold.

"Hang in there, Sylphie!" Zane called out, his voice snapping her out of her daze. "We're almost through this!"

"Yes, Master!" she replied, her voice trembling but resolute.

The air grew thick with the smell of burning hay and blood, and the rabbits' numbers began to dwindle. And then, just as abruptly as it began, the flow of rabbits stopped. The last of the horde leapt into the trap, only to be skewered moments later. Silence fell over the clearing, save for the crackling of the flames and the heavy breathing of the villagers.

Zane let out a shaky laugh, leaning against the hay wall for support. "Well," he said, his voice dripping with exhaustion and sarcasm, "that wasn't traumatic at all."

Ron, Vlad, and Tim lowered their spears, their faces slick with sweat and their hands trembling from the effort.

"Good work, team," Zane said, giving them a thumbs-up. "I'd say you've officially earned the title of Rabbit Slayers Extraordinaire."

Tim snorted, a grin tugging at the corner of his lips. "Pardon me my lord, but you're insane, you know that?"

"Genius and insanity are cousins," Zane quipped, pushing off the wall. He turned to Sylphie, who had cautiously stepped closer to him.

"Master," she said softly, her gaze flicking between him and the smoldering remains of the battlefield. "Are we... safe now?"

Zane glanced at the cage, the flames, and the now-empty forest. He exhaled, a mix of relief and weariness washing over him.

"For now," he said. "But if these things have cousins, we're screwed."

He turned back to the cage, surveying the mountain of lifeless rabbits. "Alright, folks. Let's clean this mess up. I hope someone here knows a good recipe for rabbit stew."