Chapter Forty-two.

As Christopher led Lina out of the hospital room, the fluorescent lights in the hallway seemed to hum in sync with her racing thoughts. She knew that look on her brother's face - the stern expression, the furrowed brow - and she had a feeling she was in for a lecture.

Lina tried to shake off the feeling, but it only seemed to intensify as Christopher guided her to a quiet corner of the hospital.

'What's going on, Chris?' Lina asked, trying to sound nonchalant despite the butterflies in her stomach.

She leaned against the wall, her arms crossed over her chest, attempting to appear casual.

Christopher stopped in front of her, his eyes locked on hers. "Lina, we need to talk about Arnold," he said, his voice firm but laced with concern.

Lina's heart skipped a beat as she looked away, trying to deflect the conversation. "What about him?" she asked, her tone a little too casual.

'Don't play dumb, Lina,' Christopher said firmly.

'I know what I saw going on between you two, before I barged in like that. Lina, you were going to kiss him.' He uttered in a tone conveying his disapproval. 

Lina's eyes darted nervously around the hallway after her brother's words, as if the weight of his gaze had suddenly made her feel exposed.

'Look, I know you two have a history, and I know there might be something going on between you now. But are you really ready for this?' Christopher queried, lowering his tone.

'You're still carrying around a lot of emotional baggage from the past, and it's not fair to Arnold to get involved with you, when you're not being honest with him about what really happened to you.' He muttered. 

Lina felt a mix of defensiveness and hurt rising to the surface. "You don't understand, Christopher. Arnold and I are just trying to reconnect as friends. And just like a true friend, I'm only trying to help him while he's in the hospital," she said, her voice rising slightly.

Christopher's expression didn't change. "I'm not talking about friendship, Lina. I'm talking about the way you look at each other. I've seen the way Arnold looks at you, like he's still got feelings for you. And I've seen the way you look at him, like you're trying to hold back," he said, his voice softening slightly.

'But, you can't keep running from your past, Lina. You need to face it head-on and deal with it before you can even think about starting something new with anyone, especially Arnold.' He added.

'He really needs to know what truly happened that night you ran away from home.' He declared. 

Lina felt a lump form in her throat as she looked away, trying to swallow back tears.

'Don't you think he deserves the truth, at least?' Christopher posed a rhetoric.

'You don't want things getting messy again between you two, do you?' He fired again.

'If you are not going to tell him, then please do not toy with the man's feelings all over again. You are my sister, and I love you, but I will not watch you take this path that you're likely to regret.' He proclaimed, his eyes searching hers.

Lina knew her brother was right. She had ghosted Arnold 15 years ago because of her past pain, and she wasn't sure if she was ready to face those demons again.

But she couldn't deny the connection she felt with Arnold, and she wasn't sure if she was ready to let him go.

Even if that wasn't a feeling she should be nursing, she couldn't help it.

'Christopher, I...' she started to say, but her brother cut her off.

'Listen to me, Lina. I'm not asking you to forget what happened or to pretend it didn't affect you. I'm only asking you to face it, to deal with it, to heal. Because until you do, you're going to keep sabotaging any relationship you try to build with anyone, even if that person is Arnold, who understands you. You need to prioritize your own healing before you can even think about being with someone else.' Christopher said, his voice filled with conviction.

'Right.' Lina nodded, agreeing with her brother.

'Of course, I am right.' Christopher stated, reaching for Lina's arm. His grip was solid, but yielding, like a gentle anchor.

Lina nodded again, feeling a sense of resolve wash over her. 

'I will try my very possible best to avoid getting involved with anyone romantically, especially Arnold.' She blurted, missing out the whole point her brother was trying to make.

'What?!' Christopher spat, looking puzzled.

His firm grip on her arm suddenly became loose, as his hand falls back, grazing his thigh.

'I know, I may never heal from this.' Lina started, drowning Christopher in further confusion. 

'I mean, it's been 15 years now, and I have had series of therapists and sessions, until I found Myrah in Istanbul.' She went on, pacing around, in front of her brother.

'My nightmares has not stopped. I still get panic attacks when anything reminds me of that night. I still can't stand our father.' She added. 

She continued, not realizing Christopher was going to say something. "I still nurse the feeling to hop and leave whenever I come here, and frankly speaking, it has not gotten better over the couple of weeks that I have been here."

'So, you are right. I should not involve anyone in my drama, not now that I know I am damage beyond repair.' Lina retorted.

'Thank you for making come back to my senses, Chris. I don't know what I was thinking.' She smiled, reaching Christopher's shoulders with a firm touch that seemed to punctuate her words.

As she placed her hands on his shoulders, a look of determination on her face, he shook his head, his expression incredulous. "You're not getting it, are you?" he said, his voice tinged with frustration. "You're completely missing the point."

'What do you mean?' She fired, arching an eyebrow. 

'I wasn't telling you to completely ignore your feelings or eliminate your possible happiness.' Christopher remarked.

'I was only telling you to come clean with everything, if you intend to start anything with anyone.' He added. 

'And how to you expect me to do that?' Lina shot, withdrawing her arms from him.

'Didn't you hear all that I just said about not being able to heal?' She fired again.

'You can heal, Lina.' Christopher lowered his voice, trying to avoid the glances they were getting from other people in the hospital. 

'You have the capacity to do that. You just have to set yourself free, talk to the people who hurt you. Dad is still here, you can get closure.' He added. 

He started, 'Mr. Roderick may have ...' but Lina spoke over him, not letting him finish.

'Don't you dare call that monster's name in front of me.' Lina blared in a tone that attracted the glances Christopher didn't want.

A tone that he had never heard her use with him - a tone which terrified him in all his masculinity. 

'How dare you, Christopher?' She spat.

Her eyes crackled in unearthly fury, flames dancing in her gaze.

Christopher intuitively took a few steps back.

'How dare you say his name in front of me, after all that has happened?' Lina eyes moisten in fury and pain.

'How could you speak about him to me after I confided in you?' Her voice cracked, a sob racking her frail figure.

'You promised...' her words trapped in her guts.

Christopher approached cautiously, his hands hovering uncertainly in mid-air, as if weighing the pros and cons of offering a supportive touch. His sceptical expression revealed his doubts about whether to intervene or give space.

Before he could make a decision, Lina's knees buckled and she fell to the ground.

Christopher quickly wrapped his arms around her waist, trying to steady her.

Her words tumbled out in a heartbreaking torrent, each one a testament to the pain and anguish she'd been carrying.

'I shouldn't have stayed this long, Christopher. I should have left immediately after nana was buried. Maybe all of these wouldn't have happened.' She sobbed, her voice cracking with emotion.

'The longer I stay, the more I am reminded of it. You don't understand what it's like to live with this weight, to carry this burden around every day.' 

Christopher's face contorted in concern as he tried to console her. He gently guided her to a nearby bench, his arm supporting her as she collapsed onto it. Her body shook with sobs, and he sat down beside her, his arm wrapped around her shoulders.

'Just breathe, Lina,' he whispered softly, his voice a gentle calm in the midst of her turmoil.

'Let it out, let it all out.' He stroked her hair, his touch gentle and soothing, as he tried to comfort her.

As Lina cried, her body wracked with sobs, Christopher held her close, his presence a steady, reassuring force.

He didn't try to fill the silence with words; instead, he let her cry, letting her emotions flow freely.

The hospital corridor faded into the background as Christopher focused on comforting Lina. He didn't mind the nurses and the janitor who kept pacing around the corridor, as though they were looking to get more information. 

As the minutes ticked by, Lina's sobs gradually subsided, replaced by ragged breathing and the occasional sniffle. 

Slowly she lifted her head - disengaging the hug, then wiped her face with the sleeve of the loose dress she had on.

'I am leaving America, as soon as Arnold is discharged from the hospital.' Lina dropped a bombshell that caught Christopher off guard.