9. A Crack in the Routine

Days blurred together in an endless, gray haze. Morning seeped into afternoon, and afternoon collapsed into night without ceremony. Time had become shapeless, a heavy, suffocating thing that hung over the apartment like a thick, unmoving fog.

Most days, Ruby didn't bother to open the blinds. The light felt intrusive, glaring, reminding her that life was still moving outside her walls while hers had come to a standstill. The curtains stayed drawn, the apartment cloaked in muted shadows that matched the weight in her chest.

Her mornings began whenever she woke up: sometimes before noon, sometimes long after. It didn't matter. There were no emails to answer, no calls to return, no purpose to drag her out of bed. She stumbled into the kitchen, brewed a pot of coffee she rarely finished, and sat on the couch with her laptop unopened beside her.

The television became her constant companion, a dull, numbing noise that filled the silence. Shows she barely cared for played on repeat, reruns of sitcoms she had watched a hundred times, talk shows with empty chatter that bled into each other. The voices blurred, blending into the monotony.

Her days were hollow, the hours bleeding into each other in an endless loop. If she used to despise the monotony of her office job, now she longed for that sense of structure, something to mark the passage of time, to make each day feel distinct.

Sometimes she remembered the girl she used to be: vibrant, restless, hopeful. The girl who had walked out of her job with her head high, convinced she could build a better life. The girl who had dreamed of adventure, of breaking free.

Now, she barely recognized herself. Her reflection in the bathroom mirror looked faded: her hair unkempt, her eyes tired and dull, her face expressionless. The spark of her old personality: bright, effervescent, and curious had dimmed, replaced by a quiet, heavy sadness.

Her social life had withered. She ignored Leah's texts and dodged her calls, too ashamed to admit how far she had fallen. Natalie still reached out, checking in with a patience that made the young woman feel guilty, but the calls felt forced, like obligations she couldn't escape.

The guilt sat heavy in her chest, guilt for wasting Natalie's generosity, for burdening her sister with her failures, for lying about how she was really doing. Sometimes she wondered if it would be better to disappear, to fade away quietly so she wouldn't be a weight around anyone's neck.

She had tried applying to jobs at first, with desperate optimism, then with reluctant determination. Now, she didn't bother. The laptop sat untouched most days, the unopened emails piling up like reminders of a world she no longer belonged to.

It was a Friday afternoon when the phone rang. The screen lit up with Natalie's name, the familiar photo of her sister smiling brightly, Isla perched on her hip. The sight of it made something twist in her chest: guilt, longing, regret.

She hesitated but answered, pressing the phone to her ear.

~ Ruby: "Hey."

~ Natalie: "Hey, Rubes. How's it going?"

Her sister's voice was warm, steady, the voice of someone whose life still had rhythm and purpose.

~ Ruby: "Oh, you know. Same old, same old."

~ Natalie: "Yeah? What's the same old these days?"

The red-haired woman shifted on the couch, her eyes dropping to the coffee table cluttered with empty mugs and crumpled napkins.

~ Ruby: "Just... the usual. Hanging out. Watching TV. Applying to stuff."

The pause that followed was pointed, a silence that said more than words. Natalie knew her better than anyone, knew how easily she deflected.

~ Natalie: "Have you heard anything back? Any responses?"

The young woman swallowed, a bitter taste in her mouth. Her fingers curled around the edge of the blanket, knuckles white.

~ Ruby: "No. Nothing."

~ Natalie: "Are you still checking? Still looking?" the older sister's voice softened, a careful, gentle note that made the young woman's throat tighten.

Ruby's shoulders slumped. The truth broke through before she could stop it.

~ Ruby: "I... No. I stopped. It doesn't matter. No one's hiring me. No one wants me."

Natalie was quiet, but the silence felt less like judgment and more like understanding.

~ Natalie: "Rubes, why don't you open your laptop? Just check. Maybe there's something."

~ Ruby: "There won't be."

~ Natalie: "Just humor me. Please?"

The green-eyed woman closed her eyes, exhaustion dragging at her bones. The last thing she wanted was to stare at that empty inbox, the graveyard of unanswered applications. But her sister's voice was steady, insistent, a lifeline she couldn't ignore.

With a resigned sigh, she pulled the laptop into her lap and powered it on. The screen glowed too brightly in the dim room, the harsh light making her squint. The familiar sound of notifications pinged, a reminder of how long it had been since she'd checked anything.

Her fingers moved slowly, opening her email, her heart already heavy with expectation. Most of it was junk: promotions, subscriptions, spam. She began to scroll, her mind already numb, already preparing to shut it down and tell Natalie there was nothing.

But then she saw it.

{Sender: Ocean Odyssey Cruises

Subject: Employment Opportunity

- Follow-Up

Date: One Week Ago}

The world seemed to tilt. Her heart hammered in her chest, the sound rushing in her ears. Her breath caught, a sharp, startled gasp.

~ Ruby: "Oh my God!" she exclaimed, shocked and surprised.

~ Natalie: "Ruby? What is it? What happened?" her voice crackled through the phone, concerned.

The younger sister's green eyes widened, her fingers trembling as she clicked the email open. Her gaze scanned the words, the sentences blurring together before they snapped into focus:

{"Dear Ruby,

Thank you for your application for a hospitality position aboard Ocean Odyssey Cruises. We are pleased to inform you that a position has become available, and we would like to invite you to a virtual interview to discuss your qualifications further."}

A stunned, breathless laugh escaped her lips, half disbelief, half euphoria.

~ Ruby: "They contacted me. The cruise line. The one from months ago. They actually want to interview me."

Natalie's relieved laugh rang through the phone, a sound of pure joy and surprise.

~ Natalie: "Oh my God, Ruby! That's incredible!"

The room spun, the heaviness lifting just a little. She could hardly process it: the idea that there was still a chance, that someone had seen her, wanted her, believed she could be more than the failure she had convinced herself she was.

~ Ruby: "I thought....I thought it was over. I thought they just forgot about me."

~ Natalie: "Well, they didn't. They want to talk to you. This is your chance, Ruby. This could be everything you wanted."

Her fingers hovered over the keyboard, her breath unsteady. The doubts still lingered: fear, uncertainty but beneath it all, something else was stirring.

🌬️🌬️🌬️🌬️🌬️🌬️🌬️🌬️🌬️🌬️🌬️🌬️🌬️🌬️🌬️

🛳️ 🛳️

🛥️ 🛥️

⛴️ 𝑵𝒐 𝑺𝒂𝒇𝒆 𝑯𝒂𝒓𝒃𝒐𝒓 ⛴️

🚢 🚢

⛴️ ⛴️

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She stared at the screen, her pulse thrumming in her ears. The words on the email felt surreal, like they had appeared by mistake, meant for someone else. Her fingers hovered over the trackpad, trembling slightly as if the message might disappear if she touched it wrong.

Natalie's voice crackled through the phone, breaking through the stunned silence.

~ Natalie: "Ruby? Are you still there?"

Ruby's mouth was dry, her breath shallow.

~ Ruby: "I don't know if this is real. I thought they forgot about me."

~ Natalie: "Read it to me. The whole thing."

Her sister's voice was steady, grounding. Ruby blinked, her eyes stinging, and swallowed the knot in her throat. She forced herself to read the email aloud, her voice wavering.

The words hung in the air, surreal and impossible as she was reading. She glanced at the date: one week ago. A whole week this email had been waiting, sitting silently in her inbox while she had convinced herself there was nothing left to hope for.

~ Natalie: "Rubes, this is huge. They reached out. They want to talk to you!"

~ Ruby: "I don't understand. Why now? After all this time? I thought I missed my chance." the red-haired young woman let out a breathless laugh, somewhere between disbelief and exhilaration.

~ Natalie: "Maybe something opened up. Maybe they had a last-minute spot to fill. Who cares why? They want you, Ruby."

Her sister's words rang in her ears, but part of her couldn't believe it. Couldn't accept that this wasn't just some cruel mistake, a misunderstanding that would fall apart the second she responded.

Her fingers hovered over the keyboard, her mind reeling. An interview. An actual interview. A chance to finally break out of the cycle she had been trapped in for months.

~ Ruby: "What if they change their mind? What if I'm not what they're looking for? What if I screw it up?"

~ Natalie: "Ruby, listen to me. They chose you. They read your application, and they saw something they wanted. You have to at least try. You owe it to yourself to try." her voice softened, firm but gentle.

Her chest tightened. She wanted to believe her sister's words, to believe that there was still a chance, that she hadn't already destroyed everything.

~ Ruby: "I don't know if I can do this."

~ Natalie: "Yes, you can. You've made it this far, Rubes. You're stronger than you think. Just take it one step at a time. Email them back, set up the interview. Just that. Don't think about the rest yet."

Her fingers tightened around the edge of the laptop. The room felt too small, the air too heavy, but she couldn't let herself back out now. Not when the tiniest sliver of hope was breaking through the cracks.

~ Ruby: "Okay. I'll email them back."

~ Natalie: "Do it right now. I'll stay on the phone with you."

The red-haired young woman inhaled slowly, trying to steady the tremble in her hands. She clicked the reply button, the blank message box staring back at her. For a moment, her mind went completely blank. Words felt impossible, foreign.

~ Ruby: "What do I even say?"

Natalie's laugh was warm, reassuring.

~ Natalie: "Just be honest. Tell them you're excited, you're interested, and you'd love to schedule the interview. Keep it simple."

Her heart hammered, but she began to type, the words slow and hesitant:

{"Hi,

Thank you so much for considering my application. I'm very excited about the opportunity to interview and learn more about the position. Please let me know when would be convenient for you, and I will make myself available.

Best regards,

Ruby"}

She stared at the message, her thumb hovering over the "send" button. Doubts prickled at her skin: what if it wasn't good enough? What if they had already moved on? What if it was all just a mistake?

Her older sister's voice broke through the chaos.

~ Natalie: "Send it, Rubes. Just hit send."

Her heart leaped as she did it. The screen flashed, the email disappeared into cyberspace, and the room fell silent again. Her pulse was still racing, but there was a rush of relief beneath the panic: a release, a sliver of hope.

~ Ruby: "I sent it."

Natalie's cheer rang through the phone, bright and triumphant.

~ Natalie: "Yes! See? You did it. Now, all you have to do is wait. Whatever happens, you tried. You didn't give up."

The young woman let out a shaky breath, the weight in her chest lifting just a little. It wasn't fixed, not by a long shot, but for the first time in months, there was something to hold on to.

~ Ruby: "Thank you, Nat. I mean it."

~ Natalie: "Anytime, Rubes. I love you. And I'm so damn proud of you."

~ Ruby: "I love you too."

Her throat tightened, but this time it wasn't the suffocating weight of failure. It was gratitude, sharp, overwhelming, and real.

They said their goodbyes, and the apartment fell quiet once more. The laptop sat open on the coffee table, the email still sent, irreversible. Her gaze lingered on the screen, the familiar doubt scratching at the edges of her mind.

But beneath it all, a fragile, flickering spark had taken root. Maybe it would go out. Maybe it would all fall apart. But for the first time in months, she allowed herself to hope.