Chapter 14: In Search of my Messiah

After I, Benesha, single-handedly took down five guys in front of countless witnesses, I earned the respect of everyone at school—everyone from first grade to the seniors, and even the teachers. Word quickly spread that no one should mess with me.Because of that, the guys didn't exactly view me as "feminine." But honestly, I didn't care.I had my own loyal group of girls who followed me everywhere, and Tshikuta was always with me, too. Occasionally, Sansula and Maria would tag along as well.But something had started to bug me. Maria, despite her impressive stats, never seemed to achieve perfect scores in anything. Whether it was sports, math, language, history, or geography, she always had high marks—but they weren't perfect.Considering her abilities, it didn't make sense to me.One day, as we walked to school together, I decided to confront her. "Why are you hiding your true potential?" I asked.She feigned ignorance at first. "What are you talking about?""I saw your stats in the lab. I know you're a monster," I said bluntly.She let out a soft laugh. "And that's exactly why I'm hiding my potential, Ira dear."I frowned, not fully understanding. "What do you mean?""Because I don't want people to think of me as a monster. I want them to see me as just a regular 14-year-old girl," she explained, her voice oddly calm."Fair enough," I muttered, still processing her words.Then she turned the conversation in an unexpected direction. "I see that you value Tshikuta a lot...""Don't involve him in this," I warned, a sharp edge to my voice.She smiled, an unsettling glint in her eyes. "Hmm... Maybe I will one day.""What would you gain from it?""I want to prove my superiority over all my sisters in this experiment. And I also want to keep Sansula for myself. You and your parents are standing in my way."I stared at her, a mixture of disbelief and disgust rising in my chest. "You're a total psycho.""I was born this way, just like you were born with 'wrath,'" Maria said, her tone casual but laced with an underlying challenge."But I wouldn't drag others into our battle for supremacy," I retorted, trying to distance myself from her twisted logic.She smirked, unfazed. "I wonder, though, how far you can take that 'wrath' of yours...""Meaning?" I asked, a flicker of wariness creeping into my voice."Would you go so far as to take someone's life?" she asked, her eyes glinting with an unsettling curiosity. "And if so, how? Could you burn someone alive? Drown them? Torture them until they beg you to end their suffering?"I recoiled, not sure whether I was more disturbed by her words or the coldness with which she spoke. "What...?"Maria leaned in closer, her voice almost a whisper. "I would love to see how far you'd go, Ira."I quickly stepped back, trying to regain some sense of control. "Forget about it. What you're describing is borderline criminal. I don't want to end up in prison."She laughed softly, the sound chilling in its amusement. "Ah, look at you, being all pseudo-ethical... It's cute."I frowned. "Huh?!""You didn't say you'd never hurt anyone because you don't want to—" she paused, studying my face, "—because you don't want to harm them, but because you don't want to deal with the law, right?" Her smile deepened. "So, let's say you're in a situation where you could unleash your wrath on someone you think deserves it, and the law wouldn't come after you. Would you be open to the idea of torturing or killing them?"I quickened my pace, feeling my discomfort grow. Maria was dangerously manipulative, playing mind games that sent chills down my spine.By the time I was 16, my parents sat me down and told me they wanted me to marry Tshikuta, a fellow noble Badilite. I gave my consent, knowing that no other man could ever be more suited for me."I'm glad you want to marry me, Benesha," Tshikuta said, his smile warm and genuine."It's not like any other man would be able to take care of me," I replied, keeping my tone neutral."But you do like me, right?" he asked, his eyes searching mine for an answer."Of course," I replied, a small smile tugging at my lips."I mean, you like me, right?" Tshikuta pressed, his eyes shining with curiosity."Yeah..." I answered, unsure where this conversation was headed."So, you have feelings for me!" He grinned, a playful edge to his voice.I couldn't help but blush a little. "You've had a crush on me since you were eight. I only started developing feelings for you when I was twelve.""So what?" He chuckled, clearly amused."I'm just saying..." I trailed off, feeling flustered under his gaze.He leaned in a little closer. "You're cute, you know?"I let out a short laugh. "You're literally the only guy who says that.""Good," he said with a grin. "And I hope it stays that way."I couldn't help but feel my heart flutter. I was in love with Tshikuta. Having someone like him in my life meant the world to me. But Maria... I wasn't sure what she was plotting, and I didn't trust her.If she even tried to interfere with my relationship with Tshikuta, I would kill her. And if she tried to take Sansula away from me, it would be the same fate for her.Taking down Lilith wouldn't be easy, though. I would need the cooperation of all my sisters, and I hadn't seen them in ten years. We might no longer share the same ideals, but that wouldn't stop me from doing what needed to be done.One evening, Tshikuta, Sansula, Maria, and I went to a concert. The headliner was none other than my sister Haniya Nadibun, though few knew her true identity. She was the most popular up-and-coming musician in the world today.Haniya performed under the stage name Asaliy, or عسلي, which means "honey-like" in Arabic. Western fans, however, called her "Ashley" because it was easier to pronounce. I loved her music. It was raw, emotional, and I could relate to the lyrics on a personal level.She sang her most recent song titled "In Search of my Messiah", this being the lyrics:Redeem me for I want to be freeUnlock my heart with your heavenly keyBut there is nobody out there to save meAwaiting my Messiah for what feels like an eternityI am enslaved by my desiresBurning my soul is on fireCan't you see the situation is dire?I've been forgotten in this disasterBring me salvationWhere is my savior?Is he heading my way on his white horse?Dressed in armor?Holding a sword?Bring me salvationWhere is my savior?Is he heading my way on his white horse?Dressed in armor?Holding a sword?I'm growing impatientFalling from hope to despairListen my heart needs to be repairedI can't wait foreverSlay this demon inside of meWho has been possessing me constantlyCan't you see who I truly want to beIt's someone you've set freeThe Messiah in my life is Tshikuta. I can only hope that Ashley, too, has found hers—if she hasn't already.Tshikuta, Sansula, Maria, and I had all applied to attend the Utrecht Metropolitan Self-Development School, a utopian institution built by the Dutch government in the city of Utrecht.As I stepped onto the school grounds with my suitcase in hand, I came face to face with my sister, Haniya. It had been a while since I last saw her...