Chapter Twenty-Eight

"So you're saying she found out on his death that he had been cheating on her."

"Tragic, right?" Diane said as she took a bite off the croissant.

"You can say that again," I said eating a piece of my croissant.

I feel so bad for her. For someone who doesn't like to be pitied, she does have a lot of baggage.

"That year was the worst for her. She started living with us after her parents' death. I saw how she acted back then. She stopped attending school and didn't want to leave the house. We'd sometimes caught her staring blankly at nothing. It got worse with the nightmares. We would hear her screams in the middle of the night." Diane told me as if she was reliving the memory.

"My parents got her a therapist. It didn't work at first. But a year later, she began to act normal. It started when she told my father that she wanted to attend school. She took her schooling seriously. She even graduated from senior high school with high honors. We all thought she was fine and she's healing. But..."

"She began to date girls?" I interjected.

"Yes, but that isn't the problem. She was only toying with these girls. Now that I'm here with her. I got to see the extent of it, firsthand. If it weren't for you, I wouldn't have known that she's destroying relationships to get the girl. Then, dump her like she's nothing."

"What did your parents think about her behavior?" I asked.

"They weren't supportive. However, they tolerate her. For my father, as long as Ate Claire is taking her studies and the company seriously, it's fine. My mother thinks that it's only a phase and she'll get over it someday."

"I see where your disappointment stems. You want her to stop hurting other people and be serious with her romantic relationship."

"Yes. There's that. But I still want her to be straight again."

Woah! I honestly didn't know how to react to that. Is Claire being straight? It's something that I had thought of but not sure if I really wish to see it.

"You want her to be straight?"

"Yes, of course! I mean... look at her! She's too gorgeous to be a lesbian. A lot of women would do whatever they can to have a face and body like hers. And she's just wasting it!"

Well... I can agree with that. There's no denying that Justine Claire is indeed a great beauty. She wouldn't have boys like Patrick obsessing over her or girls falling for her if she isn't.

"To be fair, she still takes care of that beauty," I commented.

"Well, for now, she is. I don't know if I can say the same in the future. I fear that one day she'll decide to... you know... go under the knife."

I get what Diane was afraid of. After all, how many trans-men today started out as feminine lesbians? But, should she choose to do so, why should we interfere?

"But don't you think that you should just accept her the way she is?" I asked trying to take Claire's side for the sake of this conversation.

"Accept her?" Diane looked at me with a scrunching forehead.

"What I meant to say is that people who came out of the closet are very accepted nowadays. These people find it as the work of fate if they find themselves liking someone of their own sex. It's not that I believe them. I'm just saying that for the sake of this argument, they might be right and this might apply to Claire as well."

Ever since I took an interest in Psychology, I always believed that homosexuality or being a part of the 'LGBTQ+' is the work of the mind. I never think people are born gay or any of the other existing gender orientations.

However, I have always been an avid supporter of Humanitarianism. I believe no human should be discriminated against or be rid of their rights just because they do not fit into the social norms.

"I get what you are trying to say. But if I had never seen Ate Claire being straight, I wouldn't be disappointed like this. I feel that this isn't the path she should take. Honestly speaking, I don't think she's being genuine in her 'lesbian-ness'. I believe she is only doing this because she's hurt."

"You think Claire being a lesbian is a defense mechanism of hers?"

"Exactly! I hope I can find a way to completely heal her heart and mind. If she still looks for a girl after she's healed, then I won't stop her."

Diane did make a fair point. But before any of us could speak another word, approaching footsteps were heard.

"I'm back," she announced as soon as she went into the kitchen.

Diane and I looked at her like we weren't talking about her just now.

"Oh? Are those mini croissants?" she said as she drew closer to the counter.

"Yes. I saved some for you in the oven." Diane said while pointing behind herself.

"Great! Could you make me some of that hot chocolate too? I'll be cleaning up the study room for a bit so Cyrus and I can start with the project."

"Sure!" Diane replied.

"Okay! I'll be upstairs," she said and left Diane and me alone again.

When she was out of earshot, Diane began to speak.

"I guess we can't continue our previous topic anymore." She stood up from the counter and began preparing her cousin's hot chocolate.

I smiled at her as I finished drinking my hot chocolate. She's right. We can't continue that topic anymore. Luckily, I have another topic reserved.

"So... how are you doing now since... you know, the breakup?"

Diane looked at me in astonishment. Then, she turned back to what she was doing.

"I'm doing fine." She said almost running on her words.

"Ryan told me what happened..." I said, "I'm sorry for being the cause-"

"No, Kuya. This isn't your fault. It is Ryan and I's fault why we broke up. We are the ones who said those hurtful words to each other, not you. We just..."

Diane let out a sigh before she continued.

"We just thought we knew each other that well. But, there are things that we just can't stand in each other. I guess there was still more for us to learn about each other."

"You're right. Since you said that 'there was still more for you to learn about each other'... Is it okay for me to assume that there's a chance for you to take Ryan back?" I asked in wonderment.

"To be honest, I don't know. I said a lot of things that I shouldn't. I didn't mean them though. I didn't mean to hurt Ryan." She replied as she neatly placed the mini croissants on a plate.

"I know. I understand. Ryan said the same thing too. He's not mad at you. If you two talked, I'm sure you can work this out." I encouraged her.

Diane went back to the counter with the hot chocolate and mini croissants on a tray.

"I'm not mad at him too. But I guessed I was just very embarrassed. I can't talk to him now, not yet."

With that, I decided not to press on with the conversation. But I'm happy because, at least, there's hope. She's not mad at Ryan. She's just not ready to face him yet.

At that moment, I heard footsteps approaching. I guess this talk with Diane is over.

"I'm done! Let's go upstairs." Claire said.

"Okay. I guess I'll see you later, Diane." I said turning to Diane from Claire.

"Okay! See you later, Kuya Justin Cyrus!"

"I'll carry that," I said referring to the tray.

Diane nodded giving the tray to me. I followed Claire upstairs. She was considerate enough to slow down her pace to match mine. The second floor is as beautiful as the first. Minimalist's taste indeed.

Claire, then guided me towards an opened door. She opened the door wider so I could get in without any trouble. I was awed at the sight of the room. No wonder it's called a "study room". It's like a small library here.

"You can place that on the table," she said pointing to the large table at the center of the room. I followed her instructions as she closed the door.

"By the way, did you talk with Ryan about the time we went to the amusement park?" she asked so suddenly I almost didn't catch it.

"Oh! Yes. We went home late that day and Ryan was worried about me. He asked where I've been so I told him."

"Good. Were you able to talk to Diane about Ryan while I was gone?"

"Yes, we did."

Claire smiled. That kind of smile you give when you accomplish something.

"That's great! What did she say?"

"She said that she isn't mad at Ryan anymore," I said.

Then I proceeded to tell her the other things Diane said (minus the part when we talked about her). I also shared my assessment of the current situation of the two.

"That is good. Very good. Those two will soon realize that they broke up for nothing."

"Yes, you're right," I said. But to my surprise, I didn't feel as elated as I was supposed to.

"So... our next step now is to find a way for the two to get over their embarrassment and talk, right?"

"Yes, right," I said

Why? Why does my heart feel like it's sinking?