·Chapter 12: The Pixie Fiasco

Lockhart raised both hands, palms down, signaling his adoring fans to quiet down.

"I don't mind giving you all a little treat for my fans," he said with a charming smile, winking at them. Then, adopting a mock-serious expression, he placed a finger on his lips. "But remember, this is class time. I understand your excitement at meeting your idol, but please, try to keep it down for now."

The chattering young witches fell silent, though whispers still drifted through the classroom.

"Ah! He's so handsome! I love him so much!" "Professor Lockhart is amazing!"

The boys in the room collectively rolled their eyes, joined by a young girl sitting next to Glenn.

Glenn, draped in black silk, kept his eyes closed.

Lockhart returned Glenn's book to him and began pacing theatrically before the class. "I see you've all bought my complete works—excellent, very excellent indeed." He suddenly stopped and looked at the young students before him. "Now then, I think… we'll start with a little quiz today. Don't worry, it's just to see how much you've read and remembered!"

Picking up a stack of papers from the podium, Lockhart handed them out one by one before returning to the front of the class. "You have thirty minutes. Now—begin!" With a dramatic turn, he pointed at the students in an overly flamboyant pose.

(Imagine a JoJo pose here.)

The girl who had been looking exasperated suddenly perked up at the mention of a quiz. She lightly patted her cheeks to focus, picked up the paper, and began reading it intently.

"Question one: What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favorite color? … Lilac…" Hermione muttered to herself as she read the first question. She quickly filled in the answer, recalling it from one of Lockhart's books.

But the second question left her baffled.

"Question two: What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition? … How would I know that?!" Hermione couldn't help but mutter aloud. Known for her straightforward nature, she immediately raised her hand.

Lockhart, noticing the adorable young witch with her hand raised, smiled and gestured for her to speak. "Yes, my dear young lady? If you're asking for an autograph, we can arrange that after—"

"No… Professor, I'm not asking for an autograph," Hermione replied, her face darkening.

What on earth? Would a proper professor really ask their students if they wanted an autograph during class?

Well, if it were Professor McGonagall's autograph, Hermione might have been tempted. But Lockhart's? No, thank you.

"I wanted to ask," Hermione continued, her tone filled with genuine confusion, "Does this quiz have anything to do with our course?"

The entire quiz was filled with questions about Lockhart's personal life. Anyone unaware might have thought this wasn't a Defense Against the Dark Arts class but a personal fan club meeting for Gilderoy Lockhart.

Lockhart clearly hadn't anticipated such a question from the young witch. For a moment, his prepared response got stuck in his throat, and his words came to an awkward halt.

But Lockhart, being Lockhart, quickly regained his composure. With his signature smile, he organized his thoughts and replied, "Oh, of course it does." He playfully winked at Hermione. "After all, I am your Defense Against the Dark Arts professor. This quiz is to help me understand how well you know me so I can tailor the course accordingly."

Is that so?

Hermione sat down, still skeptical, choosing not to press further. After all, he was their nominal professor, and questioning his decisions on the very first day seemed a bit impolite. There was no need to be overly confrontational.

The young witch had grown a lot over the years. She now thought carefully before speaking.

But as she stared at the quiz in front of her, she felt increasingly frustrated. She could only answer one or two questions based on Lockhart's books; the rest left her completely stumped.

This was the first time Hermione had ever felt so helpless in front of a quiz.

Hermione glanced at Glenn pitifully, only to find that his quiz looked just like hers—filled with only the answers that could be found in the books.

Glenn shrugged, indicating that he was just as clueless.

Who in their right mind would bother remembering Lockhart's secret ambitions?

The young witch looked around and saw that the other students were equally distressed, which made her feel a bit better.

So it wasn't just her and Glenn who found this odd. The real oddball here was Lockhart!

Many students resigned themselves to their fate, putting down their quills and waiting for the quiz to end.

A dry thirty minutes passed in their collective boredom. Lockhart began collecting the quizzes.

"Tsk tsk, unbelievable—almost no one remembered my favorite color is lilac, a widely known fact." Lockhart clutched his head dramatically. "I clearly mentioned it in Year with the Yeti. Honestly, you should all reread that book."

Lockhart launched into a lengthy explanation of the answers to all ten quiz questions. Even Hermione, who was sitting upright and trying her best to pay attention, couldn't help but yawn.

Seriously, after a morning of Herbology and Transfiguration, now having to listen to this nonsense that had nothing to do with Defense Against the Dark Arts, the young witch was on the verge of dozing off.

After rambling on for far too long, Lockhart finally decided to start the actual lesson. "Now, let's get down to business…" He bent down and pulled out a large cage covered with a cloth from behind the podium. Struggling to lift it, he slammed it onto the podium with a loud clang, startling Hermione awake.

"Behold, young witches and wizards! My task is to teach you how to defend yourselves against the most evil things known to the magical world. What you are about to face in this classroom is the most terrifying thing…" He placed his hand on the cloth, speaking with an air of mystery. "But remember, as long as I'm here, you'll be safe. All I ask is that you remain calm!"

This dramatic speech successfully captured the attention of all the young wizards and witches. One by one, they lifted their heads from their desks, craning their necks to see what was under the cloth.

"Do not scream. It will only provoke these demons…" Lockhart lowered his voice. "Stay as quiet as possible."

Everyone watched Lockhart's movements intently, afraid to miss anything.

He pulled off the cloth, revealing a cage full of… Cornish Pixies!

Cornish Pixies??

Hermione, who had been on high alert, was dumbfounded. Glenn, sitting beside her, didn't even flinch—he could sense no danger from the cage.

"Pfft." Many students recognized the Cornish Pixies and couldn't help but laugh.

Draco laughed the loudest.

"What's so funny, Mr. Malfoy?" Lockhart asked, trying to hide his displeasure with a forced smile.

"Professor Lockhart, are you sure these little creatures can really be called… dangerous?" Draco sneered, clearly unimpressed by the pixies.

"Don't underestimate them!" Lockhart snapped, his irritation evident. It seemed Draco's comment had struck a nerve.

But the laughter didn't stop, and Lockhart grew increasingly frustrated.

"Fine, fine! If that's the case, let's see how you handle them yourselves!" He suddenly opened the cage door, releasing the Cornish Pixies.

Glenn's expression immediately turned cold. The cage was dangerously close to Hermione, and the door was facing directly toward the two of them.

The pixies swarmed out, and Glenn quickly pressed the startled young witch's head down, shielding her with his arm.

The pixies zipped through the air, their blue bodies darting past the two students and scattering across the classroom.

Chaos erupted. The young wizards and witches screamed as they dodged the pixies' pranks. The creatures wreaked havoc, turning the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom upside down.

Some pixies even began targeting the students. Caught off guard, most of them didn't have time to draw their wands and could only run for cover.

Neville swatted away two pixies attempting to ambush him and stood back-to-back with Draco.

Lockhart, seemingly pleased with the students' panicked reactions, called out loudly, "Don't panic! Just corral them—they're only pixies! Watch me!"

He confidently drew his wand.

"Pesky pixie pesternomi!" he shouted, reciting a string of gibberish that clearly wasn't a proper incantation. Unsurprisingly, nothing happened. In fact, one of the pixies snatched Lockhart's wand and tossed it out the window.

The class bell rang, and Lockhart, visibly flustered, breathed a sigh of relief.

"Uh, well, that's your homework for today. I trust you'll handle these pixies just fine." Lockhart grinned awkwardly before dashing into his office and slamming the door shut.

The students scrambled to flee the classroom, with one polite student even closing the door behind them.

The four remaining in the classroom—Glenn, Hermione, Draco, and Neville—exchanged looks.

"Immobulus!" Glenn and Hermione shouted in unison, casting the Freezing Charm to immobilize the rampaging pixies. The creatures froze mid-air, finally bringing the chaos to an end.

Hermione, thoroughly disappointed with Lockhart as a professor, had waited to see his true abilities before stepping in to control the situation. The result? Utterly underwhelming.

Still fuming over how close Hermione had come to being hurt, Glenn raised his wand and blasted open the door to Lockhart's office with a loud Bang. A startled yelp came from inside.

With another flick of his wand, Glenn levitated the immobilized pixies and dumped them all into the office. He then cast a Mending Charm to repair the door.

Draco, grinning mischievously, added a Locking Charm to the newly repaired door. "That should keep him in there for a while," he said, giving Glenn a thumbs-up.

Glenn nodded and removed the Freezing Charm from the pixies.

Shrieks erupted from the office, followed by frantic banging on the door.

Glenn, ever considerate, cast a Silencing Charm on the door to prevent Lockhart's screams from disturbing the rest of Hogwarts.

"Let's go," Glenn said, tugging at the dazed young witch who still hadn't grasped the situation.

"Uh, isn't this… a bit much?" Hermione hesitated, feeling that they might have gone too far. After all, Lockhart didn't even have his wand.

"It's fine. He deserves a little lesson," Glenn replied calmly, using his cane to draw patterns on the floor. With a touch of Alchemy, he fused the door seamlessly with the wall.

After all, Lockhart had been reckless enough to endanger Hermione.

Serves him right.

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