125. Steps for a new life, 2

(Rose)

I'm feeling the warmth of direct sunlight onto my skin. The wind is really cold, but so much warmth comes from within me. I feel rather good.

I feel my body waking up slowly after a very long sleep. I'm not too sore.

I know she's there, just there close to me. You've been watching over me all this time.

The veil is silently opening itself. The warm air I was bathing in is leaking outside. I close my eyes for a second as the direct sky light hurt my sight.

I hear a soft metallic sound. A musical note. Then another. And others follow. She's playing music for me and it's amusing.

I lift up my head and try to sit. It's difficult to move. So many flowers have grown all over me, it's as if I was tied up within a very heavy and thick flowery coat. Thorn-less pale brambles and small, pale buds are covering my entire body from head to toes, as if it was a sarcophagus. I recognise the small glowing rose...

The ties loosen and I can sit. The flowers and leaves are falling like snow away from me. Their music fades.

I discover I'm on a small mound in the middle of a swamp. Odd?

It looks like the basin where the forest was, but it's all gone, along with the red light. I'm worried suddenly. I'm feeling sad.

Did it just leave? My heart aches. My chest feels weird. Some flowers haven't fallen over me. I take a closer look.

The flowers are growing out of me, from my wounds. It's within me now.

And I hear a tearful or timid voice coming from within my chest.

B - It is the best I was able to do... For you to live... And for me... To move.

R - What happened to my body?

B - Wounds... My defensive gaz... my mistakes, your flaws... I did everything I could to keep you alive and sane...

I don't feel bad, but I'm still anxious. About me, and why also about her?

R - What happened to your body?

B - I... Consumed it.

She tells me with anxiety in her voice. She wasn't able to make another copy of me, because there was no picture anymore. A picture of me as I was before, down to an atomic level, or even lower.

She used her body as fuel to melt what we both were into something that would live on...

She tells me that she melted the best of her to refill my dying body. She made her body obey to mine at a cellular level, and managed to make it work.

And now, I'm the one holding her life between my hands. Because my body is saved, and she reduced herself to the few flowers growing out of it.

She became a parasite growing onto me, it's roots fused with my flesh and circulatory system.

It feels really weird. I would never have thought such things possible. And somewhat, it feels nice too.

Blume told me I could kill her, simply ripping the last flowers out. She abandoned all control of her body. To help me. No, not exactly.

Just for a chance to see the world with me.

She became a passenger so I could bring her along with me. To see other things... To travel with me.

It's not a pet. She's not truly human either, despite her abilities to think and talk...

She's awaiting my answer, meekly.

My choice... To accept this insanity or to get rid of her. I'm thinking about something else actually while she worries.

What do I want to be?

If there's one thing I understood from this world, it's that the boundary between what's allowed or possible, and what cannot be; it ran away so far in the distance I can't see it anymore.

I'm not sure if this is liberty. Maybe it's different now. I think it is...

What did we all want to become?

I'm a little nervous when I think about my choice. My heartbeat is rising as I think up the words of my answer to her. Before I can tell her, she speaks again. She felt I was nervous, I can tell in her voice. If her feelings in her voice are genuine.

B - Before you decide... I can tell you what you don't know... The first thing is that I've always, always cherished...

R - I know. I already know.

I'm looking at the largest flower. I take it in my hand without pulling on the stem. I can feel it tremble a little. She wonders.

R - I heard you all this time. I heard your voice all the time I was asleep.

She never stopped talking to me. Confessing her sins, her innocence, her dreams, her past, what she did and what she felt.

She wasn't sure that I could hear, still learning how human bodies function. But she felt the human need to confess what weight she had on her heart, to me. Even what looked like bare understanding of love...

She felt awful for everything that happened. Still thrilled, but also sorry. She had her fun in a way; but longed for something more. Something I can offer.

Maybe even more than a real understanding or the ability to move and travel. She dreamt of romantic feelings she still is unable to picture or describe. She is both bold and very innocent. It makes me smile now that I think about it. It's true, she didn't lie. She's a flower...

I keep a grin I think. Can she see me, or feel it from within? I'll tease her. I'm still holding the anxious flower in my hand.

R - I've heard everything you said... Every word, and every thought...

She's trembling. I feel it. She seems a little happy too. No, it's rather a strong feeling of relief. She thinks she can find solace in what I just said before she meets her fate.

She loves me.

In a way nothing but a daiûa could ever have. I can't truly describe the extent of it. And she hasn't even fully understood it herself.

How odd does it sound... But I think I can accept her. Maybe I can even grow one day to love her?

Can you see that, sister? I've become... Ah, well, I don't know. I don't think I'm really human anymore.

Let's just say I've become a different kind of Rose...

And Blume too. She used the small rose I brought back from home to shape her new self. But mostly, she only wanted to be with me...

The flowers growing on my chest and left arm are not only hers! They're mine too.

She shyly asks for my answer.

I stand up. I turn around. I see a path behind the decaying leftovers from the forest where I stand. I can leave.

Since she can feel my touch, I gently touch one of the flowers.

R - Welcome to a new world.

She's beaming silently. Soon, I will be.

Dear flower on my arm...

~