179. Visiting friends, 6

(Blume)

The Dragon gave me everything I asked for. Coldly? It just does not care about what doesn't bother its priorities.

It doesn't mind wasting resources on things as strange as us. It surely has more than enough.

I free us from the bowels of a beast I could only feel uneasy about. I call it dragon, but it's more a humongous shapeless fungus, inhabiting the rock bed of this countryside and discreetly growing inside. Its amount of biological mass may be thousands of tons already.

All I can say is I'd rather be far from it. And I trust Rose would feel the same. If I can spare her the shock, I won't speak about what I saw inside.

Though as long as I remain in this body, I'll have too eventually.

What happened below...

It's this new world she keeps referring to, in contrast to the old one she grew in.

A world both more beautiful and far more grim. A mixture of natural poetry and savagery. Higher contrasts I guess.

What I saw down there was altogether normal, understandable, and terrifying.

How Rose was shocked that some of us can consider human beings as barely naught but meat. It was just a different path in amorality.

Luckily, it's over. I know what I want, what I always wanted, and I got it!

It's all that matters. To me.

To us. For her, the way to do so matters to. She's more sensitive than I. She still feels guilty at times, as if she were not worthy of being human, but she still is a better human than I'll ever be.

She's close to my ideal. Well... Maybe.

At least, she's dear to me. I want her.

And very soon, she will live again. She will rise and shine anew.

~

The dragon brought me and Rose's large bulb back to the surface.

Rose is asleep in a foetal posture, in an organic adult-sized placenta. Her umbilical cord is like a tree of blood vessels spreading through this soft and red egg. It's almost ready to hatch, so I can carry it around if I'm careful.

First, as we exit the dragon's lair in a field a mile away from the open mouth, I ran back there. I recovered our backpack, and hir Rose's skeleton between roots of trees. Then I returned.

The air on naked skin feels cold but not unpleasant. Humans wear clothes. We don't care, most of the time.

We're not far from where her friends live. I thought about asking them for help. I couldn't decide for some reason. I think deep down, I don't want to. I want to keep Rose to myself when I can.

One thing I can't get enough off with this human body... More than pain or pleasures, it's how the mind and body balance each other. Running, eating, sleeping, they all affect what I feel, and vice-versa. I'm not a soul beyond reality anymore. I'm real now, and just like Rose in more ways than one. It's more pleasant to me being able to experience this balance between body and mind than having sex.

Which I didn't expect as I was teasing Rose.

But feeling alive and crying means more to me right now.

Though I wouldn't refuse playing with her once she wakes up.

I reach the giant red egg where I left it, in the middle of a random field. It's as if it sprouted out of the ground spontaneously. It somehow did in fact.

This egg is resilient enough, and I'm actually stronger than I should now. I can lift it despite it being roughly my size. It's not practical at all, but I circle my arms around it and begin to walk sideways. I want to settle us in the swamp further north. A good place. Lots of water and various organic compounds to eat.

As I walk, I realise that no matter how much I enjoy feeling alive as a human being, life is boring without Rose. I want her!

If the extent of my folly for her is lessen in this state where my emotions are biochemically regulated, this makes some feelings a little weird inside of me.

Since I live in this body, I'm a little mixed up in my feelings for her. My persona is slightly contaminated by her. By her body... So my identity is feeling a little confused when I look at her, which is a little of myself too.

But the weird feelings are little worries. I love her. My heart does ache when I look at her as she is. It physically does. It's real. My feelings are real. It reassures me.

I'm carrying that giant egg that I hold strongly, stretching it a little. I'm walking not a single care in the world, almost.

When suddenly, after a day or two I hear something behind me I didn't expect.

~

As a human the senses are different, they have limits but you can't quite feel them. It feels as if nothing cannot be perceived if it's around. I was wrong, and I was surprised. I might have felt this presence hadn't I had a human body, but my other senses are numbed as I now am.

I was walking peacefully when I suddenly heard it right behind me.

M - Rose?

I almost dropped the egg in surprise. I turned around and met the young girl with black skin right next to me. Myls, Rose's second friend. She looked at us in obvious shock and incomprehension. I smiled.

How could she understand what she was seeing? This was funny in a way.

I put the egg down, allowing it to recover a more plump shape. The girl was still on her guards a little.

I extended a hand, cleared my voice, and did my best to imitate the tone I could make as a flower. She looked at me with wider eyes. She then looked at the egg where Rose was asleep, then back at me.

M - B... Blume?

I nodded. She suddenly laughed. I followed.

~

Rose... is dead. She understood it. Then she didn't, as she looked at us, but I saw the moment of shock and sadness appear on her face briefly.

Then she recalled our plan. The swamp. A place where we chose to reappear if the worst were to happen.

Well, it did.

And unfortunately, it is not over.

As we camp for the night, I discuss with Myls. Zeslinry is more Rose's friend, while Myls is now more mine. It's funny.

She doesn't make fire like Rose. She says it's more cautious. Fire used to keep beasts away, but nowadays it mostly attracts monsters.

Humans aren't at the top of the food chain anymore. We are. And Myls is wise enough despite her youth, to avoid unnecessary risks. She's smart.

I'm cold and I shiver, though I don't really mind. Once this body dies, I'll return to my true self. I'll be free again. I just need it to hold on a few more miles so I don't really care.

Myls doesn't know what to do. She tried to invite me to sleep in her tent, but I want to stay outside. I want to keep an eye on the great egg made of flesh. I'm afraid its translucent skin might rupture when I'm not looking.

Night falls, maybe half a mile away from where we met a few hours ago. Myls talked a lot. She wants to know what we've been through and what we're going to do. She wants to know.

She understood what happened to Rose when I mimicried it for her. The strangulation, and the head being crushed like an... egg. I couldn't very well explain what happened next until we met.

She understood what I will do next, finish resurrecting Rose as promised. I miss her. I love her. I want her back. And I promised her I would bring her back, in this time or another. Though this time is better. She'll be happy to see it did not take a few more centuries.

I don't know what the world will look like then, but I bet Rose wouldn't like it better. She would feel even more isolated and abandoned. No, this time is definitely better.

I doze off. I try to fight sleep but fail. I fall and wake up, but then remain lying on the grass. Despite the coldness, I sleep.

And I dream... I dream of you. You're just ahead, standing in a sunny field. I see your back, your hair untied. It's very rare.

The field is golden. It's summer surely then. Is it real? I try to reach you and to call out your name. I hear nothing and I'm still behind you. I have no body. I'm there, but I'm not really. I'm like a ghost just a step behind you.

I try to yell your name in despair, but all we can hear or feel is a slow wind. I don't exist. You will never in a million lives find out that I'm right there and that I love you... We're too different... You will never be able to see me.

I'm crying silently, unable to move, only looking at you from behind. Dreaming that you could find me someday against all odds...

You begin to turn around. I see your face but the sun blinds me. My heart suddenly aches a lot and I wake up.

~

Myls had brought me a blanket.

It's morning. She's eating. She smiles at me. I'm waking up with a cold sweat all over me and my back hurts.

I stand up. I go look at Rose. Myls looks at me going with curiosity, I already forgot her presence.

I put my hand on the soft skin of the egg. I see Rose inside. Something very painful moves in my heart and I suddenly break down in tears. Again.

I begin to cry and I lose control over most of my body and senses. I fall down like a broken-minded doll, like the others in the dragon's lair. I cry and crawl randomly, my brain and mind turning to mush. I think I fell asleep then, or perhaps passed out.

~

Myls is holding my head and making me drink. I can hardly move. My head hurts as if I had a hangover.

If only...

I need Rose. I tell her. She nods that I'm right. She caresses my forehead and hair as if I were a child or a pet. It feels rather nice but it makes me want to cry again. I do a little more, but more quietly.

A little while later, I can stand again. I recover my strength, my power, and grab the egg. I lift it up, my feet sink into the ground because of the weight. I resume my walk. Myls comes along with me. She'll help me. We're friend now.

It probably won't last this way for long, but it's nice.

Soon enough, we reach the swamp. I'll build a proper next here for Rose to wake up. And I will make it a bliss for her like she's never felt. I want it. (I want sex now.)

After a while, Myls left. She understood we wouldn't go anywhere for a while from now on. She can visit anytime.

Until you wake up in my arms, Rose, we're not going anywhere.

I'll finish making you come back to life, and with more pleasure than ever.

I love you so much Rose...

~