347. Colours of earth, 9

(Rose)

I could hardly swim by myself when we had to cross the weird river on our way.

Bleue had already used everything we had managed to harvest from our flying trees so far. There was nothing left but my experiments, and we wouldn't want to try them on our skin.

Bleue could swim and Ana could fly. But neither was strong enough to carry me over. I thought they could, but I tend to overestimate physical strength. They didn't want to try it.

Instead of finding a way together, we split again. The headed ahead. I would wait or go alongside the ruptured river bank looking for another chance.

I needed some time alone, and their time would be better spent at home. Ana would bring me some food later.

I was left with Bleue's feathers dress, a sword and a rifle, waiting for my guardian spirit animal the giant crow to return.

I needed some time alone. It wouldn't be for long.

I can't believe it lasted but a day or two... Time collapsed on me. Time itself was pain.

Breathe Rose... You're alright. And Bleue is there.

As I look at the dusk covering the landscape, I think of you. What you were in that unreal past. What you are now.

Like many adults before me I'm sure, I long for a moment of bliss, lost between idealised memories and fantasies of my past childhood.

But really I was born today.

I don't have a belly button anymore.

The lack of scar is an invisible reminder now, of what this world can be when we're not careful.

And how frail a life can be.

I'm so much mortal, I've already died more than once.

Yet it doesn't necessarily means the end of all things.

I sit there contemplating the night sky, over the contrasted land, river and sea.

There are still just as many stars in the sky.

Some things of nature will never change.

Others can. I'm living proof of that.

The number of roses in the world has known a rapid growth, and then, probably a steady decline.

I've become like another species, brought to a new land. Growth too fast, demographic explosion, and decline. Eventually, the species might adapt, and survive.

I've never really met Dragod.

From what Blume & Licht told me, it was a being-like-her I would not have felt comfortable making a willing pact with.

Now its story has ended. This pact I once made with god, is long over.

Yet here I am, in a different time, in a different land, with different earth colours, plants, smells and life forms around.

And doing yet again what my old culture would condemn in a few ways, and envy in many others. Blasphemies against life and death that the current nature of things allows regardless of what I think of it.

My heart is beating fast, pumping blood in my arteries. Air fills my lungs. Hunger tickles my stomach and thirst my tongue.

And I will be sleeping outside tonight. In this beautiful land I've always dreamt of discovering someday.

Though in my dreams, the streets of the city were busy and noisy.

Night has fallen.

I'm happy to be here, a little longer on this Earth, and as myself.

~

I couldn't really sleep, but I was lying there, looking at the milky way.

Neither Bleue nor Ana came back yet, but I'm not worried. I have faith in them and I guess they're waiting for the first light of dawn.

I know what they're doing currently.

Packing. They're packing for good.

Bleue never told me she found a haven in the mountains. She would have, had she found a chance for us to stay in the area.

So there's no point for me to go back home, since we have to migrate north. They will return tomorrow with the essential. At worst in a few days.

And then we'll begin heading north, back into Europe.

We'll be leaving our home, and this colourful land I love.

I feel a little sad about it. I will certainly feel more sad as we begin walking away. I really liked this place, but necessity drove us away.

We shouldn't try to fight this kind of flow probably. Even if we could.

The potential from the other side of reality comes with all its unthinkable chances to backfire.

It's the one lesson above all others to know when dealing with daiûas, and I've failed again. I was too arrogant and reckless, again.

How many times will I get burnt touching their flames?

That number will only be known the day I meet my fate. The day it will last rise anew. I will keep going toward them...

Because we're all humans. Because their gambles also brought me the most amazing things in existence. Love. Life. New life. Travel, journeys. All the colours of other continents. Joy, happiness. Everything.

They made me dream. They gave me hope, and they kept me alive.

My last return, I also owe it very indirectly to those exploding flowers somewhere south of here, in the middle of nowhere.

These powers can bring the worst and the best without care.

This land is full of wonders. How could I not love it? It's all the beauty my father put into his tales.

~

I sat as I heard a rustle. I'm trying to see the animal which made the noise.

Maybe I was overthinking it.

Strange things lurk in the shadows aside the wind. Everywhere.

In this land we've found mould looking at the sky, and the blue bird of happiness. Well... In a way.

Okay, we found a beast that kind of looks like a bird and is a little on the bluish side of black and dark greys on some spots. I like the poetry of the simplified pictures sometimes.

Under the night sky, the landscape is a different kind of beauty.

I remember finding it a little too dry and uniform in its dusty colours in the beginning.

But I've seen so much more, and learnt fast to enjoy so more enjoyable shades and tints, all over what my eyes could see. And even slightly beyond.

Our city was, is, was, an art museum. A living muse even. Even beyond its now dry and empty real museums from another era.

Everywhere I've been, it felt like I had not yet seen enough.

I really liked living here.

Too bad we have better odds at surviving through the summer by heading north and leaving for a while. Maybe not for good? I'd like to think this really was and will remain our home for Bleue and I.

Meanwhile, while I was deep in thoughts, a shadow darker than night emerged in the distance, walking silently toward me.

Nightmare had left her domain to come find me.

~