Sophie sat curled up on her couch, her laptop balanced on her knees, fingers resting lightly against the keyboard. The soft hum of her apartment filled the quiet—nothing but the occasional ticking of the clock and the faint whir of the heater.
She should have been reviewing research notes for tomorrow's lecture, but her mind wasn't on work. It hadn't been for a while now.
The chat window blinked, pulling her attention back.
Jack: Have you ever thought about what would happen if we met?
Her heart skipped a beat. She blinked at the screen, reading the words again, as if to make sure she hadn't imagined them.
Of course, she had thought about it. More times than she could admit. But seeing him say it—seeing the question laid out so plainly—made it feel real in a way it never had before.
She hesitated before typing her response.
Sophie: Yes.
She hit send and exhaled slowly, waiting.
Jack's reply came quickly.
Jack: And?
Sophie chewed on her bottom lip, staring at the blinking cursor. What was she supposed to say? That she had imagined a dozen different scenarios, each one shifting between thrilling and terrifying? That she had wondered if meeting him would be the most exciting thing she'd ever done or the biggest mistake?
Instead, she typed the truth.
Sophie: And I don't know. I think about it, but…
She stopped. She didn't know how to finish that sentence.
Jack didn't rush her. He never did. But when his next message appeared, it was like he had plucked the words straight from her mind.
Jack: What if it's not the same in person?
Sophie inhaled sharply. That was it, wasn't it? The fear neither of them had spoken aloud until now.
She let her fingers hover over the keys, debating. Finally, she typed.
Sophie: What if it's better?
Jack's response came after a pause.
Jack: You always do that.
Sophie smiled faintly.
Sophie: Do what?
Jack: Make me rethink things.
She didn't know what to say to that. They had fallen into this strange, comfortable space together, where words were easy and thoughts felt lighter when shared. But now they were standing on the edge of something else, something bigger than the conversations they had at night, hidden behind screens.
Sophie: But you're still scared.
Another pause.
Jack: Aren't you?
She swallowed, curling her fingers into her sweater sleeve.
Sophie: Yes. I am.
The words felt heavier than she expected. She wasn't used to admitting fear—to anyone, let alone herself. But Jack made it easy, in a way no one else ever had.
He didn't push her for more. He never did.
Jack: So what do we do?
Sophie closed her eyes for a moment. She could say, We meet. Let's find out. She could throw caution aside, take the leap she had been too afraid to take for so long.
But she couldn't.
Not yet.
She typed the words before she could talk herself out of them.
Sophie: We wait. For now.
Her breath caught as she hit send. It was the truth. The safest choice. But why did it feel like a tiny piece of her was breaking off as she said it?
Jack didn't argue.
Jack: Okay.
That was it. No long debate, no convincing. Just that simple word that meant they would keep things exactly as they were.
Sophie sat there for a long time after that, staring at their messages, feeling something settle deep inside her. Relief? Disappointment? She couldn't tell.
All she knew was that, for now, they remained two people, connected by words, too afraid to step into something real.
For now, what if would have to be enough.