01 God-Forsaken World
Tap tap tap...
As the rain continues to pour down on the building, so is the dread in my heart.
"Haaaah..."
In my small and tidy apartment, I looked over the shelf adorned with trophies and badges. In the past, they were sources of pride and reminders of my achievements, but now... they feel like relics of a distant life that no longer belong to me. It seems as though their existence was just there to mock me for the feelings I once held.
Whirr... whirr...
Thud-thud-thud...
With the rain getting heavier, hitting harder on the roof of my apartment. I lay down the pen and paper on the table, with a sense of calm and quiet acceptance. I began writing my final article.
---
Dear Whoever Finds This,
I write these words not just out of despair, but as a lament for what I have witnessed. Once, I believed in the goodness of people, in the strength of humanity to rise above its flaws. I fought for that belief, for justice, for a world where kindness and honor prevailed. I once believed that with enough resolve, with enough sacrifice, we could change the world.
But the world I see now is not the one I fought for. It is a place marred by greed, cruelty, and indifference. I have watched as atrocities unfold, as the strong trample the weak, as compassion is overshadowed by selfish desires. Each day, the weight of these sights crushes the remnants of my spirit. Resolve crumbles under the weight of corruption, and sacrifice becomes just another tally mark in a ledger of loss.
My broken body is but a reflection of a broken world. My useless legs are a constant reminder that my strength alone cannot change the tide of darkness that envelopes humanity. I can no longer bear to witness the suffering, the betrayal of what we could be, the unyielding march of cruelty.
To those who knew me before, remember me as the man who believed, who fought for a better tomorrow. Not this hollow shell, disillusioned and weary. Forgive me for choosing to find peace in the only way I can see.
To this world, I bid farewell, not out of fear, but out of a profound sorrow for what we have become.
Zoran
---
Whirr... whirr...
As I lay down on my bed, my mind started reflecting back to my entire life. It was quite the rough start. My parents got killed in the war early on, with just me scurrying from one place to another, just looking to survive. I got lucky and was picked up by a commander and got sent into the army for training. Thinking back, they were probably just looking for cannon fodders.
Life in the army was hard, but fulfilling. I got to meet some of my best friends and comrades, I trained with them, laughed with them. It was the best years of my life. Most of them were just like me - victims and refugees of the war, trying our best to make a difference. To prevent our past from reenacting on others. We started out small, from a small platoon we worked our way up, some sacrificed in the process, passing their baggage onto us. When I finally reached high enough position to make a difference, there was just me, only me left standing. I could still hear their laughter, see their smiles whenever I walked down the familiar hallway, looked at the once bustling dorm. Their name, their faces, etched onto my memory. Now ghosts that haunted my waking hours.
I wanted to carry on my comrade's legacy, finish what they couldn't. But it was then I started to see the true face of the world. The so called generals committing the very same thing they condemned the others for. Arson, rape, manslaughter, trafficking, any atrocities you could and couldn't imagine, all done by these supposed "protectors of the nation".
I tried, I tried exposing them for the disgusting creatures they are, and suddenly, the whole world was against me. The commander that brought me up to this position. The liutenants that fought by my side. Even my own troops that I commanded. The day they turned on me was seared into my mind like a brand. The cold steel of shackles, the sneering faces of those I once called brothers, the sharp crack of bones as they shattered my legs, the way they threw me out like a trash — all burned into the fabric of my being.
It's been a couple of months since the war ended, and I could still remember, the darkness, the greed that those people held in their eyes. Thinking back, it has been such naive of me to trust them, to fight for them. With the top of the world being people like them, it was impossible for me to make a difference. The darkness is just too much for me. Perhaps in another life I could make a change. Perhaps...
".....Sorry." With that, I took the pill and got ready to sleep. A sleep I will never wake up from...
Thrum-thrum-thrum...
The rain got more intense, beating down on the roof. On the contrary, I could feel my heart beating slower, my breath sluggish, my eyes slowly shutting. Taking one last look at this world, I felt... nothing. No more regret. No more sadness. No more anger. No more, not for this god-forsaken world.
---
"Oh, poor soul. So much pain, so much despair... Yet, beneath it all, a heart that once burned with hope and strength. What a tragic waste to let such a spirit wither away in this cold world of cruelty."
The being observed as Zoran Thorne took his last breath and fell into his eternal slumber. She looked at Zoran's lifeless body with a mix of intrigue and pity.
"A soul like his, burdened but resilient, should not meet such an end. Perhaps, in another world, he might find purpose once more... Yes, a second chance. A world that still needs his light."
As she reached out her hand, a faint glow surrounded Zoran's body.
"Rise again, Zoran. This is not your end, but the beginning of a path yet untold. With the powers I have bestowed upon you, I'm sure you will find your purpose."