The Greatest Showman #973 – Childish

Renly noticed Ned's gaze but wasn't surprised. He wasn't flustered either.

Returning to the West End of London, Renly had mentally prepared himself. He knew the reporters would inevitably dig into the meaning behind the surname "Hall."

For Renly, he was unafraid. The reason he hesitated to discuss it in interviews wasn't because of fear—it's simply that he is an actor, and his family background has no relevance. His private life is his own, and he doesn't want the public too involved. He had always maintained this stance, and he would continue to do so in the future. He wouldn't speak of it voluntarily.

But for the Hall family, the situation was different. They did everything possible to block any news, fearing their "family scandal" becoming public.

Ned's look wasn't a threat to Renly, but rather to the Hall family.

The so-called "surname secret" had never truly been a secret in London. The only question was whether people cared enough to uncover it.

Renly flashed Ned a friendly smile, nodded graciously, and returned to his seat. He had no secrets to hide, so there was no need to panic or be nervous. Whether or not Ned could unearth the news didn't concern him.

Renly did admit, though, that sending the invitation was childish.

It felt almost like a prank, or perhaps a way of showing off. He wanted to tell them that he had made it to the West End stage by his own merit; that his performance could stand up to the scrutiny of the West End; that his persistence had finally paid off.

Deep down, the words of George and Elizabeth had resonated with him more than he had realized. Despite accolades from the Berlin Film Festival and the Oscars, despite his rising career, he still yearned for the approval of George and Elizabeth—or perhaps, simply, his family.

It was much like the former Chu Jiashu. For so long, he had suppressed the urge to chase his own freedom, craving nothing more than approval from his mother. Without realizing it, he had become accustomed to it. It had become a habit that he could no longer shake.

After being reborn, Renly fought to free himself from these chains, pursued his dreams, embraced his freedom, and got to where he was step by step. Now, he didn't need to prove anything to anyone. He knew his goals and dreams. The only person he needed to answer to was himself.

But, as it often happens, theory and practice don't always align. So, in a moment of weakness, he sent the invitation—like a child, showing off his achievements, hoping for recognition, waiting eagerly for praise.

"Maybe you're not a genius, but you've become a good actor."

Even just one sentence, simple and brief, would be more than enough.

Today's performance mattered more to Renly than ever—not only because it was the West End, not only because it was Les Misérables, not only because it was London, but also because his family would be in the audience. Today, he was more invested in his performance than he had ever been before, almost losing himself in the effort to make it perfect.

When Renly saw Elf and Arthur outside the waiting room, his emotions were a confusing mess. He couldn't find the right words to express himself. As he turned away, he straightened his back, hid his disappointment, and took a resolute step forward. There was no winner in this game.

He knew he was being childish. Still, the sadness and confusion surged within him.

He lowered his gaze, concealing the turmoil beneath, but his vision blurred. He wasn't thinking, just lingering in a moment of uncertainty, letting it pass. The noise around him echoed in his ears, but there were no distinct sounds, only an empty resonance. Time felt frozen.

Then, a flash of light caught his eye, and a faint outline of a face became clearer. With a blink, Renly saw Tom Holland in front of him.

The childlike face, eyes wide with curiosity, looked up at Renly, unable to hide his worry. His expression reflected the innocence and exuberance of youth—so vibrant and pure.

Renly couldn't help but smile. "What's wrong?"

Tom pulled a penny from nowhere, holding it between his fingertips and extending it toward Renly. "A penny, to buy what you're thinking right now."

The words Renly had prepared were on the tip of his tongue, but he paused, thinking. He opened his palm, motioning for Tom to place the penny there. "I'm thinking, what am I even doing for today's performance? Who am I trying to impress?"

Tom closed his mouth, deep in thought. His young age and inexperience made it difficult for him to come up with an answer. So, he asked, "Have you thought of the answer?"

"No," Renly replied with a slight shake of his head.

If all his dreams, all his persistence, and all his efforts were just for his family's approval, what did that say about his past 22 years—and even the 32 years of his past life? In the previous life, he had achieved nothing, dying in a hospital bed; in this life, his family had refused to recognize him, and they hadn't even attended his premiere today.

It was a sad reality.

Tom pondered for a moment. "So, what did you do this for in the first place?"

At the very beginning, maybe it was to experience the life of an actor—interpreting the lives of different characters and truly living them. Maybe it was to set a dream, to escape all constraints and live freely. Or maybe it was simply to pursue freedom and to live on his own terms, blazing his own path.

"I did it just to enjoy it," Renly found his answer—one that had been buried deep inside.

Not for lofty ideals, but just to truly enjoy life, to live authentically, to have freedom, dreams, goals, and a soul. To paint his own colorful masterpiece. There are many with dreams, but not everyone has the courage to pursue them. Renly did.

For himself. That was the answer.

Tom grinned brightly and winked. "Well, that's what I think today was about too. You know, on and off the stage, you're two completely different people. I like the one you are on stage."

Renly smiled faintly. The innocence of youth is rare because it belongs to children, to youth, and to simplicity. As people grow older, as life gets complicated, the bright, beating heart of childhood slowly loses its glow.

Now, Tom had rekindled that heart.

"You mean, I'm not as likable offstage?" Renly teased with a raised eyebrow.

"No, no, that's not what I meant!" Tom panicked, waving his hands in denial. He couldn't explain himself properly and stood there flustered, his face turning red.

The other cast members, who had been watching the exchange, glanced over. "What's going on?" Michelle Dockery asked gently.

Renly chuckled softly, waving a hand. "It's nothing. Just a joke." He patted Tom on the shoulder reassuringly. "Don't worry. I know what you mean."

Renly turned to Ned. "The interview's almost done. If you have any questions, we can talk more during the break this week. But now, let's enjoy dinner. We need to get ready for the second half."

Ned grinned. "No problem!" He stood up, shaking hands with each actor before Renly. "Uh, Renly, on the day off, besides the crew interviews, I'd like to schedule a one-on-one interview with you. How about a discussion about Edge of Tomorrow, which is coming out this summer?"

"Sure, why not?" Renly agreed, which left Ned surprised. In the past two months, getting an interview with Renly had been difficult. "Call Andy. Wait—he's in New York now. Call Roy and set up a time."

"Got it! No problem!" Ned responded with an enthusiastic "OK" gesture.

Renly motioned for Ned to leave. "I'll see you to the door."

Ned chuckled. "It's just the door. I'm not Little Red Riding Hood." The two shared another polite exchange before Ned left.

Back in the waiting room, Renly saw Tom, still anxious, following him closely but hesitating to speak. Renly smiled and paused. "What's up?"

"Renly, I just wanted to say—I don't hate you. I really don't." Tom kept repeating the same phrase, his defense empty, still very much a child.

Renly bent down, meeting Tom's eyes. "I know."

Under Renly's gaze, Tom froze for a moment, then nodded slowly, his eyes drifting away nervously. Then Renly spoke again, "Dinner's ready. We have two hours before we need to start preparations for the second half."

Actors needed to avoid heavy meals but should still eat to recharge. Afterward, they'd need to rest and adjust their energy to prepare mentally and physically for the second half of the show.

Tom's mood brightened immediately. "Got it!"