Chapter 16

Rya had expected a lot of things—mockery, suspicion from the man, maybe even another attempt to rob or kill her! Well, maybe not expected, but…

In any case, she could never have imagined in even the strangest dream that the madman would make her catch crabs.

By sheer luck, the waters of the Lake of Liurnia were teeming with crabs and crawfish from tiny ones to absurdly massive specimens, and catching them wasn't a problem. The problem lay elsewhere.

The problem was that they'd decided to do this at all.

Rya was unnerved by how calmly the man stood knee-deep in the water, waiting for prey, and how seriously he approached the task. In the past few hours, they'd already caught an entire sackful of crabs!

A sack, mind you, that the Tarnished had pulled from… somewhere incomprehensible.

She was sure this day would go down as one of the strangest in her life. First, she had catastrophically failed the one task given to her by her mother, then she'd been robbed, then she'd found a powerful Tarnished who had slain a dragon—only for them to… go crab fishing.

No, if she survived this, she would never tell her mother about it. Never in her life!

At some point, the madman decided they'd caught enough crabs and crawfish.

"Lead the way."

Rya straightened instinctively at the curt command, though only for a moment—her physiology made it difficult to stay that way.

"T-To where?"

The man shrugged.

"Didn't you follow the person who stole your necklace?"

She gawked at him, mouth slightly open.

B-But I never said it was a necklace…

The madman standing before her was growing more and more terrifying.

"Yes, I think I know…"

"Good."

Rya adjusted the sack of crabs and crawfish on her back. There were two sacks now—Konstantin carried one, and she carried the other.

A strange sense of foreboding gripped her.

They walked in complete silence. The man asked no questions, didn't try to strike up a conversation; he just followed her at a leisurely pace. At first, Rya was wary, but she soon realized that the madman didn't seem to have any malicious intentions.

In fact, it almost seemed like he wanted to help her. Or maybe not? Maybe he did?

Honestly, it was slightly reassuring. It was comforting to think that there were kind-hearted Tarnished souls in their otherwise hostile world. And the oddities…

Well, she wasn't in a position to criticize anyone's eccentricities.

...He really was trying to help, right?

Their journey unfolded… unusually. Occasionally, massive, overgrown crabs, drawn by the scent of their fallen kin, would attempt to attack them. But the strange man seemed to welcome this, immediately charging at them. His speed and agility were inhuman, and even with a simple piece of iron, he could pierce their shells to reach the soft innards. Thankfully, the crabs weren't ethereal creatures.

Rya was unnerved by how coldly and ruthlessly he dispatched their attackers.

The man seemed to want to be attacked. He craved it. A hungry predator prowling its territory, searching for prey.

Where most lucid travelers would carefully avoid dangers, knowing full well how perilous the Lands Between—and the Lake of Liurnia in particular—were, the Tarnished dragon-slayer seemed intent on making as much noise as possible, drawing in naive creatures that hoped for an easy meal.

In temperament, he resembled a dragon more than the dragon itself.

"It's gotten too quiet…" the man grumbled, scanning the surroundings with a sharp gaze. "Can't even farm properly around here…"

Rya nodded obediently.

He's scared off every living thing in the area…

A trail of corpses, both small and large, lay behind them. The waters where they passed were tinged red. The man ahead of her was soaked in blood, but it didn't seem to bother him at all.

Maybe it was because the blood, as Rya noticed, was somehow steadily dripping off him, evaporating into nothing…?

Konstantin must have sensed her unease because he turned his gaze on her. In an instant, his demeanor shifted. The harsh, farming-obsessed aura melted away, replaced by something gentler.

"Did I scare you? I'm sorry."

After defeating the dragon, Konstantin's inner Souls-like fanatic had taken over, making him forget a truth he had realized not long ago: waifus weren't just waifus. They were also… women.

Waifus had gotten too close to remain distant, idealized figures. Unfortunately for the hardcore Souls player, waifus… noticed things.

Rya gasped in surprise.

"You have nothing to apologize for, Tarnished soul…"

"Konstantin. Just Kosta, if you like."

It suddenly hit him that he hadn't properly introduced himself. Looking back at the situation through Rya's eyes, he realized just how bizarre this all must have seemed.

To be fair, it seemed bizarre to him, too.

The girl smiled hesitantly.

It really did feel like he was trying to help, and Rya decided to trust him. She didn't know how or why, but she resolved to believe in him. After all, she was such a naive girl.

Naivety was a luxury few could afford in the Lands Between.

"Alright, Konstantin. We're almost there."

This was true. Soon, the mist cleared to reveal a lonely shack. Perhaps it would have looked odd against the surrounding horrors, but then again, everything in the Lands Between during the Shattering was a wild, untamed nightmare.

The few who managed to survive in this effectively dead world adapted however they could—some swore fealty to powerful beings, others banded together in gangs, and some, if they could afford to, remained alone, leading nomadic lives while knowing a monster could end them at any moment.

And then, they too would join the ranks of the undead, stripped not only of their runes but their very sanity. If they were lucky, they might retain a shred of self-awareness…

Though perhaps that would be more of a curse than a blessing.

Instinctively, Rya ducked behind the man's broad back, cautiously peeking out. Though she was protected by charms her mother had cast, no magic could provide absolute safety.

She blinked in surprise as the scent of boiling crawfish filled her nose.

The shack, their destination, was a known waypoint for travelers. Currently, it was occupied by a former convict.

It was as if they'd been expected. A lone, intimidating man in a helm sat directly on the damp ground, calmly watching the massive pot of crawfish boiling before him.

The helmed Tarnished turned his head slowly toward the approaching pair. Upon recognizing Rya, he clicked his tongue in irritation.

Konstantin, gripping the sack in one hand, stopped a few paces away from the criminal.

The scent of crawfish was, admittedly, quite appetizing.

"What are you lookin' at? You trying to start something, mate?"

The helmed man clearly didn't appreciate Konstantin's gaze. As a former prisoner, he'd seen his fair share of maniacs—bloodthirsty, cowardly, and so insane that even now, the mere thought of them made him shudder, especially one particular… monster.

The man's gaze, cold and piercing, sent shivers down the Blackguard's spine. It wasn't the look of someone assessing another person, but rather a predator sizing up a mere toy, a disposable thing to be torn apart if it pleased him.

Without a word, the Tarnished removed the sack from his shoulder and dropped it in front of the thief. Following his lead, Raya hesitated briefly before placing her own sack next to his. The Blackguard squinted suspiciously at the sacks before cautiously rummaging through them.

He kept himself ready to defend against any sudden attack. However, his instincts whispered that if this lunatic wanted to harm him, he wouldn't have resorted to something as simple as a trap.

"What the—? Prawns?!"

The Blackguard's startled shout echoed through the clearing as he tore into the sack with greedy fervor.

"So many prawns! So many crabs!!!"

Raya blinked in disbelief at the thief's exuberance. She glanced at Konstantin, her eyes wide with incredulity.

'He knew' only to realize what was said a moment later 'Why prawns? It's crawfish. Crawfish and crabs.'

As if the bizarre scene weren't surreal enough, Konstantin's cold voice broke the air:

"I want boiled prawns."

Raya's mouth fell open.

'But he's cooking crawfish!' (1)

The Blackguard froze, his movements abruptly halting. He turned his helmeted head towards Konstantin with a strange reverence. Slowly, hesitantly, he removed his helmet. Though his skin was darker than most who dwelled in the Lands Between, his eyes glimmered with an intensity rarely seen in this bleak world.

For a fleeting moment, Konstantin wondered if such a gleam could rival the radiance of a waifu's eyes. Surely not.

"You… you really want boiled prawns?" the Blackguard asked, his voice trembling.

'They're crawfish, damn it!'

The simultaneous silent protest of both Raya and an unseen Moon Princess would have been comical under different circumstances.

Konstantin frowned and nodded solemnly.

The Tarnished might have simply taken back what was stolen by force—this man had robbed a waifu, after all. But knowing what this wretch must have endured, Konstantin couldn't help but feel a pang of pity. He decided to give him a chance. Besides, he was curious to taste these shrimp-crawfish-crabs—or whatever they were.

The Blackguard practically leapt to his feet, darting into the shack. Moments later, he returned with a plate of freshly boiled crawfish. Raya gawked, utterly dumbfounded by his enthusiasm.

The two men sat down across from each other, digging into the seafood with quiet intensity.

"Delicious," Konstantin muttered, closing his eyes with satisfaction.

The Blackguard didn't charge a single rune. In fact, they'd brought so many crabs and crawfish that they could have bartered for the shack itself. Plate after plate disappeared as Konstantin devoured one crawfish after another, unfazed by the quantity.

"Marika's tits, you must be 'ungry." (2) the Blackguard laughed, slapping his knee. "By the way, the name's Boggart!"

He grinned ear to ear, seemingly delighted by the display of hunger.

"Konstantin," the Tarnished replied flatly, not slowing his pace.

Overjoyed, Boggart stood and dashed back to the shack to fetch more "prawn", checking on the ones still cooking. Raya and the unseen Moon Princess looked on, inadvertent witnesses to the blossoming of a one-sided male camaraderie. Boggart was practically bursting with affection, while Konstantin remained stoic, his mood unchanged.

"Still hungry? Ha-ha-ha!" Boggart roared with laughter, his spirits soaring.

Konstantin set down his plate, signaling he was satisfied. While he could eat indefinitely, he saw no need to overdo it.

"I was afraid we'd have to fish out half of Lake Liurnia!" Boggart boomed. He calmed down slightly, his tone growing more contemplative. "You're Tarnished too, ain'tcha? Can you see it then? The guidance of grace, I mean.

Konstantin shrugged, his response succinct yet telling.

"I can't see it at all no more." Boggart admitted, his jovial mood darkening. "Makes no bloody sense anyway, why some no-name shithead like me should get called to the Lands Between. Cruel bloody joke, you ask me. Maybe something went tits up with it. Maybe... it's been broke for a good long time. The Erdtree, I'm sayin'."

Raya listened intently, refraining from interrupting the men's conversation. Many thought the same thing. How could they not, after surviving the Shattering War? From an outsider's perspective, their world must seem long dead. And many who lived in the Lands Between would agree.

"Yes," Konstantin replied.

The simplicity of his response sent shivers down both Boggart and Raya's spines.

'Huh?'

The Moon Princess folded her arms in surprise. Though she hadn't been watching the Tarnished all day, she caught this pivotal moment. If she'd had any lingering doubts about recruiting this Tarnished, they were now gone. He wasn't just strong. He wasn't just knowledgeable in inexplicable ways.

Most importantly, he—a Tarnished blessed by Grace—had no loyalty to the Golden Order.

'Interesting.' Would Melina feel the same way if she heard this? The Moon Princess smirked, curious about the reaction of someone so fanatically devoted to the restoration of the Elden Ring.

'This Blackguard is right: it has gone mad,' she thought, her smirk widening.

But she wasn't thinking about the Erdtree.

"If we meet again, I'll treat you to crab, Konstantin," Boggart declared, lovingly patting the sack of crabs. "We'll be best mates in no time, eh? Ha-ha-ha!"

Konstantin simply shrugged, which seemed to satisfy Boggart.

"The necklace. Return it."

Raya nodded emphatically, stepping forward. "It's very important to me! Please!"

Boggart grimaced at her high-pitched plea, digging into his pockets.

"Forgot I even had it. Take it. Worthless trinket."

"It's not worthless!" Raya snapped indignantly.

Boggart seemed about to retort, but his words faltered under Konstantin's gaze. He coughed awkwardly.

"All right, all right. Not my business."

Their parting was unexpectedly warm—at least, from Boggart's perspective. Though Konstantin exuded the aura of a dangerous killer, he had done nothing to harm him. And Boggart's instincts screamed that if the madman had wanted to, he could have.

Instead, they'd eaten prawn together. And brought him all those crabs!

Boggart couldn't remember when his birthday was, but surely it was today. It had to be. He hadn't been this happy in years. If only the crazy girl's lecturing hasn't soured his mood slightly.

"You really should stop stealing, Boggart," Raya said, shaking her head. "If you need help, Lady Tanith of Volcano Manor would surely assist you."

Boggart's face twisted into an unreadable expression. However, he quickly collected himself when he noticed the club in Konstantin's hands.

'By Marika's tits, where did he pull that club from?!'

The ex-prisoner coughed awkwardly, acknowledging the girl's argument.

"Got it, got it…"

The club vanished as if it had never existed. Boggart coughed again, still rattled.

"You know, I think I need to tell you somethin'... You 'eard of the Dung Eater?"

"Yeah. Honestly, I'm still shocked they added such a disgusting ending,(3)" Konstantin grimaced.

Somehow, Boggart managed to pick up on the subtext in his newfound brother's words:

"You see 'im though, stay well away." the guard exclaimed, nervously glancing around. "I was in the same gaol as him, once, so I know first 'and. E's a god-forsaken monster. Not just some petty thug like me." 

Boggart shook his head, lost in memories of the horrors he'd endured.

"E's a killer. Kills people and curses their souls... Does all sorts of shit to their corpses, to keep 'em cursed, forever. I ain't seen nothin' more disgustin' in all my years. I ain't never been more scared, neither. Rooted to the bloody spot... While 'e did all that, to my friend…"

"I'll get around to that side quest later," Konstantin replied with his usual calm. "Maybe in the endgame. But I'll get to it."

The Dung Eater wasn't going anywhere. He was locked up tight and wouldn't be getting out easily. Right now, there were more pressing matters. Perhaps he'd visit him when he reached the capital.

Raya gave Konstantin a strange look.

"Do as you will, madman," Boggart muttered, adjusting the crab-filled sacks on his back. "I've said my piece. Till we meet again then."

Raya watched the ex-prisoner walk away, clutching the stolen necklace tightly in her hands. Strange as it was, she felt…

Happy.

"I owe you," Zorayas murmured softly. "Thank you."

Konstantin, his target no longer in sight, exhaled slowly, a faint smile on his face.

"It's fine."

Zorayas grew even happier at his words. She quickly reached for a letter hidden in a special pocket of her dress.

"I seek stalwart Tarnished who might join our house. You are very brave yourself. Not only a steady hand, but a steady heart, merciless, even to your own kind. Such strength is precisely what my mistress seeks. Please, take this."

Konstantin raised an eyebrow.

For some reason, it felt like this was just a standard, rehearsed line.

Seeing his look, Raya shrank back and hurriedly extended the letter to her savior.

"P-please, take this letter… With it, you'll be warmly welcomed at the manor… It…"

"I know where it is."

"Really?" Zorayas exclaimed in surprise.

She was overjoyed! Her mother would be thrilled that she had found such a worthy and well-informed warrior!

Konstantin was about to respond but froze, hearing a familiar, deep voice at the edge of his consciousness:

"Tis a trap, Konstantin. Thou shouldst not venture to that manor." (4)

One of the best waifu quests. A quest tied to Ranni's ending, completed more often than the standard ending itself. (5) He was broken. Completely and utterly broken.

She had decided to intervene directly.

And the man had little idea how events would unfold from here.

His farewell to Zoraya was far warmer than his parting with the ex-prisoner, promising they'd meet again someday. It seemed as if Konstantin was alone once more, but that was a lie. The stern Tarnished made his way to the nearest Site of Grace, plopping down beside it.

Konstantin raised his eyes to the night sky. He hadn't expected to spend the entire day on this. But it didn't bother him in the slightest.

Beside him, a faintly smiling image of the doll-like demigoddess appeared in a starry flash, her hands folded neatly. Judging by her expression, she was all business.

Ranni's spectral face narrowed slightly in thought.

"Ah, we meet again, Konstantin of the Tarnished. Thy parting words linger still within my mind. I come bearing a proposal. Wilt thou swear fealty and enter into mine service?"

Konstantin froze, sincerely hoping she remembered his words correctly. He still felt a little uncomfortable about putting the waifu in an awkward position.

"About the feet… I misspoke."

"…"

Konstantin looked up, surprised at the silent sorceress.

Negotiations clearly weren't his strong suit yet. He'd gotten used to Melina, but Ranni was a different story. Deciding to avoid further blunders, he simply knelt before the demigoddess.

Ranni regarded the impassive Tarnished thoughtfully. After a moment, she nodded, as if reaching a decision.

"Then mayhaps fate hath steered thee to this reunion. My goal is to forge a new order—a world unshackled from the flaws of the past. Wilt thou enter into my service?"

Konstantin remained kneeling. Ranni, giving him time to think (though he was clearly thinking about nothing), nodded again.

"Thou'rt a rare sort. Not many would have accepted the offer. But I require as much of those under my command. I anticipate good work from thee."

The demigoddess raised a doll-like finger imperiously.

"I shall trust in thy resolve, though I expect thee not to squander such faith lightly."

Konstantin nodded. He thought her dialogue had ended, but…

"So, thou dost seek to claim my mother's Great Rune," Ranni said with a faint smirk. "I have heard thou maiden's plan, Konstantin. And I wish to add to it. Have you heard of the sorceress Sellen? And, more importantly, are you familiar with the magic of glintstone?"

The man froze, feeling his heart stop.

His inner hardcore gamer and waifu fan collided with such force that for a moment, he saw a massive red phrase before his eyes:

"YOU DIED."

Where was the loading screen… Where was it when you needed it… He needed Alexander's quest, something to distract him… Why hadn't it triggered yet? Did he miss it?

Ranni gave the muttering Tarnished a strange look, ultimately deciding not to pay it too much attention. Try as she might, she couldn't fully understand him yet.

But that was fine. In the future, they would have plenty of opportunities to get to know each other better.

…So long as this peculiar Tarnished didn't focus too much on her feet and paid more attention to his destiny instead.

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(1) In the game, he's definitely cooking crawfish, but claims they're prawn. Even the item description says "The meat actually looks to have come from a crayfish. Not that it matters, it's delicious all the same." 

What's funnier is that in russian localization it's "shrimp" instead of "prawn" while in reality it's still crawfish!

(2) Yep, this is a direct quote! "Marika's tits!"

(3) If the Lord of Blazing Flame ending involves the destruction of the world, the Blessing of Despair ending suggests cursing the entire world, condemning the remaining lives (and possibly the undead lives) of the Lands Between to eternal torment.

(4) TN: Since this chapter includes many of Ranni's direct quotes from the game, I tried to write in a similar style to the source material, to keep it consistent. Keep in mind, russian localization doesn't go so overboard with "thou", "thy" and 'thee" so her dialogue in the original version of the fic is a lot more casual. 

(5) Of course, getting to Ranni's ending isn't as easy as just playing through the game. Unfortunately, Steam statistics think otherwise: as of the writing of this chapter (and my translation of it), 28.8% have reached Ranni's ending vs. 23.6% for the basic one. And that says a lot about our society. In the best sense of the word!