11: FOUND BUT LOST

Alex stood at the entrance of a massive condo complex, the towering building looming over him. The address was correct; he double-checked the piece of paper in his hand once more.

Tiffany had given him the number of a gay friend who lived in Lunvera. At first, he had doubts about going to see the so called 'gay' friend. 'He didn't tell her he was gay?' he had thought. But after a long week of confusion, mixed emotions, and the weight of the unresolved tensions with Clara and Dave, Alex had decided it was time to take a step in a different direction. He had to clear his head.

People hurried past him, laughing, walking briskly to their own destinations, completely oblivious to his presence. The city felt fast, buzzing with life. Alex was still figuring himself out, so standing in front of the towering condo, he felt smaller than he ever had.

Taking a deep breath, he scanned the streets again. Maybe he should have just called instead of trying to figure this all out on his own. But before he could second-guess himself again, a tall guy emerged from the building. His figure was striking; tall, well-built, with a confident stride. His name, as Tiffany had mentioned, was Leo. Alex watched as Leo looked around, locking eyes with him for a split second.

Leo noticed the nervous stance Alex was in and walked over, offering a friendly, yet questioning smile. "Alex?" he asked.

Alex chuckled awkwardly, feeling like he was being caught in his own web of indecision. "yes?" he said, rubbing the back of his neck, as if he was doubting his name.

Leo chuckled in response. "Come on in. I was just about to grab some coffee. Why didn't you call instead? I've been waiting forever."

"let me have that", he said. Reaching for Alex's bag. 

Reluctantly, Alex smiled and handed the bag to him. As they walked through the lobby, Leo offered a casual wave to the receptionist. They took the elevator up, and Alex couldn't help but notice how clean and warm the place felt. It wasn't home, but it wasn't the cold, lonely dorm either. He was here, and maybe this was what he needed; a little break from everything.

When they entered the apartment, Alex was introduced to Leo's boyfriend, Aaron, who was lounging lazily on the couch. Aaron smiled sleepily, then blinked a few times when he saw Alex. "Hey, man. You're the friend Tiffany's been talking about, right?"

"Yeah, that's me," Alex said, offering a small, sheepish grin.

They exchanged a few casual pleasantries before Leo excused himself to make coffee. Aaron and Alex fell into easy conversation, talking about anything and everything. It was strange to feel this comfortable in a stranger's home, but there was something about the laid-back atmosphere that put him at ease.

"Need a place to crash?" Leo asked after a while, offering Alex the couch.

"Thanks. I don't mind," Alex replied, gratefully sinking into the cushions.

Leo and Aaron were very hospitable, and before Alex knew it, he was relaxing in a completely unfamiliar environment. He'd gotten used to the quiet dorm room, the constant tension between him and Clara, and the complicated silence with Dave. But here, in this apartment with Leo and Aaron, everything felt simple. Easy. There was no pressure.

Meanwhile, back on campus, it was a regular Saturday morning. Clara and Hannah were casually walking around the campus market, a place they both frequented. Their conversation was light and playful as usual.

"I've not seen Terah or Dave lately", Hannah said.

But Clara tried to steer the topic away from anything too serious, trying to avoid any mention of Alex or their chaotic friendship situation.

But of course, Hannah, ever the curious one, had to ask the question. "So, have you seen Alex around lately?" she asked, her tone casual but laced with a hint of underlying curiosity.

At first, Clara felt like throwing a punch on her face. "Do you really have?", she almost said.

But then, before she could find a way to switch the topic, Dave called them from behind. He just bought some fruits and was on his way back to the dorm too.

"Hey Dave", the girls said simultaneously. 

"Hi", he answered. "You done here?

"Yes", coming from Hannah. The walked for two minutes, without a word. Until Hannah again, decided to.

"Dave, have you seen Alex lately?", she asked as if she was obsessed with him, for sure.

Dave shook his head, looking at the ground. "Nah, hardly. I think he's been busy with other stuff."

"Is he even on campus?", he added.

Clara felt a pang of something sharp, something bitter, but kept her face neutral. 'So, that's it', she thought. 'He's just moving on?

Hannah, sensing the tension, backed off, but not without tossing out a comment that left Clara reeling. "I mean, if he's confused, maybe he should just take Terah if he's so bent on messing around. Not my problem."

"Do you have to talk all the time? If you are so obsessed with the two of them why don't you go look for them then", Clara snapped, a bit harshly.

Dave gave an awkward smile, but his eyes betrayed nothing. Though Clara felt the blow of what Hannah said, she tried to not talk about it. Without another word, the trio walked off to their dorm.

Back in Lunvera, Alex was still processing everything, Leo and Aaron had taken him to a local gay bar that night. A gay bar, he had chuckled when he first entered. Not because he was happy, but because he would have never pictured the Alex he know, or knew? In a gay bar.

The neon lights buzzed overhead, and the place was filled with energy, laughter, and music. Alex had never been to a bar like this before. There were men everywhere, all different shapes and sizes, lost in their own worlds of conversation, dancing, and freedom. It felt strange, yet exhilarating.

The unspoken understanding that they were all here for the same reason; no judgment, just people being themselves; calmed Alex's nerves.

Leo and Aaron were in their element, enjoying the night with other guys. Alex had never felt so out of place and yet so in tune with everything around him. 

He had a blast, even though there was a guy who almost kissed him on a dare. It had shocked him at first; the way the guy had leaned in, grinning, eyes half-lidded with the kind of recklessness that only came with too much alcohol and too little hesitation. Alex had frozen, his breath catching in his throat, heart hammering like it couldn't decide between fear and thrill.

But the moment passed. The guy laughed, backing off before their lips even brushed, throwing his hands up in surrender as the others hollered and clapped.

Alex exhaled, tension melting into something softer, something he couldn't quite name. He should've felt awkward, maybe embarrassed; but instead, a strange warmth settled in his chest. There was no mocking, no judgment. Just laughter, teasing, and the lingering scent of beer and cheap cologne.

And for the first time in a long time, Alex felt… safe. Like maybe, just maybe, he didn't have to keep running from himself.

The night ended, and they headed back to the condo. Leo and Aaron sat Alex down for a candid conversation. They were blunt but kind, offering him advice that Alex had never heard before.

"Listen, man," Leo said, leaning forward with sincerity in his voice. "You've got to figure this out, Alex. Stop holding back. If you keep running from how you feel, you're going to lose everything."

Aaron nodded in agreement. "You can't live your life in fear of what you don't understand. Go back and talk to Clara first. She deserves that. Then go to Dave. Tell him the truth, even though the fear will be there, it's not gonna be easy. But trust me, it's worth it, or else you gonna regret it. You owe it to both of them, and you owe it to yourself."

The next day, Alex boarded the bus back to campus, his head swirling with the conversation he had with Leo and Aaron. They were right. He had to stop running. He had to let Clara know how he really feels, confront his confusing relationship with Dave, and face what comes next.

When he arrived on campus, his mind was set. He would talk to Clara first, apologize for his uncertainty, and then move on to Dave. 'I can do this', he thought.

But things didn't go as planned.

As Alex approached climbed upstairs, where Dave's room was, something caught his eye. He stopped in his tracks when he saw Dave coming out of his room. But it wasn't just Dave. He was with Mike, a senior from the law department, laughing and chatting with ease. The way they interacted; it was natural, comfortable, easy. Alex felt like he was intruding on something he wasn't a part of. There was a connection there, something Alex couldn't deny, or maybe, he thought.

The realization hit Alex like a punch to the gut. 'This is it', he thought. 'He's already moved on. He's found someone else.'

Without a word, Alex turned around and walked back to his room downstairs, his heart pounding in his chest. He couldn't process what had just happened. His thoughts were scrambled, but one thing was clear, he thought: he had lost. He had no idea how to fix things now.