Frustration

Ashly is in her room and she is disappointed, why isn't Lucas being easy. She sighs. "Be calm Ashly, this can still be fixed one way or another." She says to herself, she then hears a knock on the door. Ashly of course expects it to be Lucas, and she puts up a smirk, he is easy after all. Ashly stands up and walks to the door, she can't wait to see what excuse Lucas will say or would he apologize to her.

Ashly then opens the front door and it's Richard. Ashly drops her smirk and shuts the door immediately on Richard's face. "Wait listen to me, I just saw how your friend looks." Richard said, "I wanted to know if something bad has happened, and he wouldn't speak with me so I am here to ask you instead." He says.

"Yeah no it's all fine, he is just feeling gloomy at the moment. You know, he did get shot not so long ago so it makes sense for him to feel sad. Honestly I am surprised by how he managed to keep a striaght face for a while." Ashly lies, she hopes he would just leave with that.

"Yeah alright, if you say so." Richard says as Ashly hears his footsteps disappear. She sighs and walks back to the room she is staying at. Ashly sits down on the bed and notices a book, it's a book she has seen before. Well she thinks she has as she can't remember much, no she definitely did see it before.

Ashly grabs the book, it must be a popular book if it's everywhere. She opens the book and she is surprised that there are illustrations. They are of landscapes and of a few characters. Ashly is flipping through the pages not bothered to read any of it. Maybe if she learns to read then this will be proof to Lucas that she can change. Ashly then makes a big grin, obviously Lucas won't teach her to.

Ashly begins to think about who will teach her to read… of course, that man Richard would. She will temporarily use him to read, no it isn't using as she is going to make it clear to him her intentions. Ashly closes the book and takes a deep breath. "Alright, I wasn't expecting to do this but I have no other choice." She says as she leaves the inn.

She has been entering and leaving that door frequently actually. It's a bit strange that she's changing locations so often but it can't be helped. "Hey you, Richard was it?" Ashly said as she spotted Richard, he turns as she called him and nods. "Well I have a request from you alright. I want you to teach me to read, I know it sounds weird, but you're the only person who isn't sulking that could help me."

"You didn't know how to read before?" He asked. "That's not as weird as you think, there are many people that don't know how to read. It's not something to be ashamed about, actually I know a few that were taught basic reading skills."

"Well alright, I kind of lied to you, I do know how to read a bit. It's not like I'm completely illiterate, it's that I struggle with a lot of words. I was exaggerating about not knowing how to read to gain attention from Lucas." Ashly said casually as if she didn't know there was a problem with her statement.

"Oh well first of, that's kind of a bad thing to do to your friend. Secondly, yeah I have no problem helping you learn to read more advanced words." Richard says dumbfounded from her confidence and casual expression.

"Reading is a gift that we people take for granted." Richard said, "Having a friend who wants to help you learn is honestly great. Those are the people you should keep close to you, and not push away. You shouldn't miss treat him at all, he seems like a great person to be around."

"Yeah yeah, I know what kind of person Lucas is. There is a reason I'm here right now, he helped me stay alive until this point." Ashly said. "I spend time with him, of course I would have an idea on who he might be. Do you think I'm…never mind." She said.

Richard is completely confused. "Alright then, is there any more things that you have lied to your friend about by any chance?" He asked.

"Well alright, I do know how to read maps. Of course I have to know, it's part of what I had to do. If I didn't, I would have gotten lost years ago. He is the stupid one for not putting together the pieces." She said, but she can tell Richard isn't being comfortable around her. Ashly then lowered her tone a bit. "Well I only know how to read the map that I was handed when I was a child so I was technically not lying at all."

"Alright, that's much better." Richard says not sure if it truly was, for a moment he is silent and then, "You should just be honest with him, don't just lie to him." He believes this is the best thing that she should do at the moment.

"No absolutely not, that will cause even more trouble." She said, of course she could say that Lucas will abandon her. If she did say that Richard would definitely not want anything to do with her, she had to be careful now.

"Wait a minute." Richard said, "Just earlier you were being mean. Are you just trying to pretend to be nice so he wouldn't be mad at you? Are you trying to make sure he won't treat you differently?" Ashly stays completely silent which confirms his suspicion.

Richard takes a deep breath. "Listen Ashly, you should drop this pretending of yours." He said with an assertive tone. "That's clearly not working for you at all, and don't think you can fool me either. Yeah sure at first when we meet I thought you would be a nice person. But now that I spoke with you for a bit, I know that you're a terrible person Ashly. I don't want to be around terrible people, you should leave me alone." He said.

"You may try to guilt me into helping you, but I won't fall for your bullshit. You ask yourself why is Lucas leaving you behind, and yet you act like this." He said as he points at her. "How can you not see what you're doing, are you stupid? You should drop this manipulative nonsense as no one will far for it anymore."

"Well sorry for not know what to do, it's not my fault I grew up like this. I have nothing else in my mind except for things I was taught." Yhe says, "You can't fault a girl for what she was forced to learn in this world. All Lucas tells me is to change, but how do I change? What steps am I supposed to take, and when I should. What will help me the most and what will be a waste of time? I don't know that."

"Alright, the first thing you have to do is change the way you think." Richard said as he points to her head. "Think more before you speak, its so simple yet very important." Ashly is confused by what he meant."What I mean is that before you say something, make sure you know what you're saying. Make sure you're thinking about other people's feelings when you're speaking, and if it was necessary or not."

"The first thing you have to do is make your own decisions. There are many ways to learn how to think critically."

Ashly thinks for a short while. "Alright, but can you help me read better. Like I do want to read more, and if there is a method can you just tell me now." She said.

"Well yeah I could help you learn how to read, well everyone can. If you can just show me your reading level I can figure out what you will have to do." He says and Richard can see Ashly being skeptical. "Oh I know this will work since I never went to school. I remember what my parents taught me so it won't be much trouble helping you at all." He says smiling.

———

Lucas is sitting inside the small library, he is not feeling so great. He has another map with him, he borrowed it and he is checking the route. Ethneal is his next destination, and he doesn't want to waste more time. He begins to think of a route that won't take too long, he is planing to skip a few towns.

Lucas then grabs his own map and compares them both, the map he borrowed seems to be outdated. It's outdated by almost two decades, but there aren't anymore maps that are newer than this in the library. "That's just great." He says with a huge sigh, Lucas hopes that between the time of the two decades nothing has been build. The route he has chosen might have new obstacles, and he would be annoyed since they don't mention them.

As he continues to draw this new route a singular tear drops onto the map. He moves his head away to not tarnish the map. He is softly crying. "No, I shouldn't feel sad at all. She brought this to herself, I did the right thing. She manipulated me for so long, she took advantage of the friendship I gave her."

He stops and then for a moment thinks of something. Ashly has never called him a friend before, she has only called him by his name. "I'm so stupid for realizing it to late, she never felt exited around me when we were together."

He wipes his tears, and continues to draw his route. He closes his eye for a moment, he takes deep breaths to calm himself down. Lucas hopes no one saw or heard his embarrassing moment.

———

Ashly is back at her room, with the book she begins to read it. She feels stupid for not understanding some words. "How illiterate am I?" She asks herself as she scratches her head. Richard told Ashly that she has to write down the words she doesn't understand, and underline sentences she struggles with.

"This is so embarrassing, if someone saw me I would kill myself." Ashly says under her breath. She believes she can write decently and even if she didn't, it wouldn't be much of a problem. "Why am I doing this? I hate this so much."

Ashly is supposed to then show what she wrote to Richard, and he would then attempt to guess her literary level. She is supposed to also make sure she doesn't mispronounce any word. "fuck this." Ashly was frustrated, she lets go of the pencil. "I should just tell Lucas to leave me already, maybe I should rob him blind. With that money I surely can runaway, and live somewhere better. "No, that wouldn't work, if I run away I need to know some sort of basic education."

Ashly then at that moment becomes self conscious, "Great, I was thinking about robbing the only good person I could trust." Ashly remembers when Lucas told her about his dream, and what she said when he was away. "I'm the exact person I told myself that I never wanted to be around Lucas. I'm such a hypocrite and I never thought about it."

She decides to just read the book all at once, of course she becomes confused. The story is about a man who was brought to a small village. Eventually he disappears, and no one knows where he went off to. "This is such a stupid book, it sounds so fake, and everything this person does is forced."

What gets Ashly's attention more than the book is her thoughts. When she reads the book all her mind wants to do is think of ways to get at Lucas. How will she be able to use him again, and what method could be most effective against his naive heart.