Chapter 2: Retraints

I panicked as I called out for someone to help me. I struggled to pull out of the straps on my wrists and feet. Another four across my legs, waist, chest, and head. Tears streamed down my face as I struggled desperately against the restraints even as I could hear people just outside the door of my white emotionless room.

"What the hell is wrong with you! She's a child!" I knew that was Dr. Kindlin, I recognized his voice from before.

"A dangerous child! Those restraints are for our protection! If you take them off you are finished as a Docter! I will ruin you!" That voice is definitely the old docter from before.

"This is illegal! She hasn't done anything to warrant these kind of restraints! Ruined or not I will report you! Even if you go down I will be dame sure TO BRING YOU WITH ME!!!" I could hear him screaming at the other docter as he rushed into the room.

"FINE! IF YOU GET HURT DONT EXPECT THIS HOSPITAL TO COMPINSATE YOU!!" The old man yelled as he furiously stopped away.

"FINE BY ME!" Dr. Kindlin threw his reply over his shoulder as he rushed me,

"Shhhh, shhh, Raven it's me Dr Kindin. It's ok, calm down. I can't get these off with you moving around like this. Shhhhh. Shhh. It's alright no one is going to hurt you. You're ok, now. Everything's going to be ok." The kind docter kept comforting me until I finally calmed down enough to stop struggling against the restraints.

"That's it. Good girl, now I'm gonna get these off you. Is that ok?" He waited for me to nod before he started take off the restraints, starting with my head, leaving my wrists and ankles for last. I lunged forward at him as I gripped him around his waist and kept crying. After a moment of hesitation I felt his arms go around me as he patted my head.

I don't know how long I stayed like that. It was the first time I had cried since before my Mother passed away. When I finally stopped crying, Dr. Kindlin gentle pulled me off him as he looked me in eyes. "I promise I won't let him restrain you like that again, ok." I nodded still sniffling and shaking from the exprience.

"W w w -what happened a-after.... " I struggled to speak as I tried to ask him what had happened.

He sighed as an orderly brought him a chair to sit on. He must have heard the argument between the docters as he gave me small smile as he left. I refocused on the Docter as he started explaining, "After what your Father said you slipped into an almost comatose state. When he tried to leave, you tried to go with him and had to be pulled back. Of course you fought us but you didn't try to hurt anyone. One of the Orderlys slipped on wet spot in the floor and got bloody nose but that wasn't your fault. The janitors are supposed to leave out a wet floor sign but they forgot, however, Dr. Davidson disagreed and claimed you were dangerous and had you placed in these restraints. Normally, I wouldn't tell a patient all these details but we both know you're not a patient in the same sense as the other residents of this facility. You've had enough deception in your life and if I expect you to trust me, I know I need to be honest with you."

As he spoke little pieces of what happen came back me, little by little. He was telling the truth. "He didn't look back even once, did he?" I looked into Dr. Kindlin's eyes. I could see in his eyes I was right. His silence said all. "Will he ever come back for me?" Again silence, "Will I ever leave this place?"

I could his eyes harden in Determination "I will do everything in my power to make that happen as soon as possible."

"NO!" The docter raised his brows as he questioned me with his eyes "Can it wait until I'm 16." Understanding flashed across his eyes

"Raven, I won't send you back to your father even when you leave. You would go into foster care until you come of age." I shook my head.

"Everyone that has ever known who my mother was and what she did has treated me like an infection. I didn't see it when I was younger." I looked down at my feet, "I even thought I deserved it...."

The docter stopped me angrly, "Raven you look at me!" My head shot up nervously at his angery tone but when I saw his eyes I knew me wasn't really angry at me, "You have done nothing wrong. You are a beautiful person and deserve to be treated as such."

"But my Mom..."

He didn't let me finished as he firmly interrupted me, "No. Your Mom had her own choices and they have nothing to do with you."

" But she put all the money she made hurting people in my name."

"So what, that money may not have come from a good source but having it in your name doesn't somehow make you evil. Instead of seeing that money and something evil try to think of it differently."

"Differently how?" I furrowed my eyebrows as I tried to do as he said. Everyone always said that money was evil and having it in my name made me evil too.

" Undeniable proof that your mother loved you."

I felt like lighting had struck my mind as a warmth spread in my chest. "Proof my Mom loved me. How so?"

"She could have done may things with that money but she chose to give it to you. She could have left the country with you but she stayed behind so you could have a father."

"How could you possibly know that?"

This time it was his turn to be confused, "Because she said so in her will." My eyes widened as tears formed in my eyes once again, "Your father didn't tell you, did he?" His eyes were soft as I shook my head. He seemed to make up his mind. "Alright, I won't make move just yet. I will quietly gather all the evidence I can and when you turn 16 I will get you release as an emancipated minor. Luckily, this country allows for you to become a legal adult early under the right circumstances and I'd say your situation more then qualifies."

I was so excited that I couldnt help but jerk forward to hug him again but he stopped me. "Sorry but hospital policy doesn't allow for close conduct like this. If I'm going to be your Docter for the next few year we have be careful to follow all the rules so certain doctors don't have a reason to do as they please."

I nodded my head, I lived most of life like that up to this point what's few more years. " I can do it. What are all the rules?" Dr Kindlin nodded ad handed me a thick book. I was a little surprised at the length but I've read plenty of large technical books before. "Won't be a problem."

He chuckled, "If there's anything you don't understand you can always come an ask me. Currently you have roaming privileges. That means other then at lights out, you are allowed to leave your room to do activities or study in the library. Right, now other then not being able to leave the grounds you don't have a whole lot of restrictions. Just remember, never go into another patients room and if a patient is making you feel threatened calmly make your way back to your room or my office, whichever is closer."

He paused for moment."Now that I'm thinking about this in more depth, this is really not a good idea. There's too much that can go wrong here and you could be put in danger when one of the other patients has a partically bad episode. No, I should bring this up now." He went to stand up and leave but I grabbed his hand.

"Wait! What if I didn't roam around?"

"That won't work. You cant stay stuck in this room for years plus you have to study for school. Being in here is not a free pass to get out of school. It would just be online."

"Then what if I have a computer in my room?"

"Not allowed."

"Then what if I do my classes in your office and right after I can have my appointment with you, since you're going to be my docter, then go back to my room?"

"You still can't be stuck in your room all the time. You need to eat and staying cooped up isn't good for you either."

"What if you come with me?"

"I have other patients I have to take care of too."

"What if I watch her?" Both our heads snap over to the door where the blonde receptionist from before is leaning against the door frame, "And just FYI, if you're going to have a private discussion do it with the door closed and when the camera is off." The docter jolted as he looked in the corner at the camera in the room. "Don't worry. Me and the orderly that brought you a chair before have the camera taken care of. No one will know what you two were just talking about."

"Thank you, but you can't really think this is a good idea?" The docter tried to reason with her.

"No, but it's better then the alternative. Even if she goes into foster care there's nothing stopping her father or another Docter like Davidson from getting into the head of whatever family she is placed with or even the social worker on her case and that's assuming they aren't already biased against her in the first place. Best case scenario, she lives her life on eggshells afraid of her own shadow until she turns 18 since she'll need a guardian's permission to apply for emancipation as a minor. Which makes no sense just BTW. And worst case, she ends up at another facility just like this one but this time doesn't have anyone on her side to help her which means when she turns 18, she'll likely be forced to stay even then. We're her best chance at escaping the shadows she had to live her life in. While she's here you can help her in the ways she actually needs while the orderly and I can keep her safe everywhere else. When she turns 16, you can sign for her since as her docter, you have the same privilages as a guardian."

After her long speech Dr kindlin sat down in the chair again and fell silent for a long time. "I need to think about this."

I reached out and grabbed his hand again, "Please" I spoke with everything I have and every inch of my battered soul bared in my pleading eyes as I looked at him.

He jolted as he stared at me, his internal struggle clear in the his eyes until finally he gave a defeated sigh, "That's not fair, you know. Sigh, fine but you don't leave this room without one of them, understood or the deals off. Got it?"

I jump up with big smile, "YESS!! Yes, I got it. I promise!"

I keep giggling to myself has the docter hung his head in defeat and the receptionist looked at him with a triumphant grin.