Chapter 15 - Relax

My mind stirred at the sensation of unknown hands shaking me, my body sluggishly dragging itself out of the depths of the exhaustion that was still plaguing me. My senses were slow to process the voice calling my name, but it sounded soft yet urgent. Hearing it was like listening to a distant echo breaking through the fog of my loosened consciousness. Every muscle in my body protested against moving again as I tried to wake up, my limbs heavy and unresponsive, my muscles aching and stiffening. It was a feeling that I wasn't in my own body... Which then reminded me of many things, jolting me enough to drift back to reality.

"Auriel... Auriel, wake up!"

The voice was closer now, more insistent, and finally, I recognized it—Lira. It was her. Funnily enough, her tone was laced with worry, a sharp contrast to the usual warmth and playfulness I had associated with her since living above her family's bakery. Finally, I forced my eyes to crack open, the faint light of a flickering candle stinging my vision as if I looked directly into the sun. It was... unpleasant. Squinting, moving my neck with a groan, and looking away, the room before me swam in and out of focus. My vision was blurred, shadows dancing on the walls, suddenly making me think they were beat-folk lurking around me, but then I quickly told myself that couldn't be true. I would be dead if it happened. Turning to my back above me, I watched as Lira's face came into focus, her features etched with obvious concern. Her eyes were now clouded with fear, and her brows were knit together in a way that made my chest tighten for a moment. Was I... dying? No. I remember how that felt. I was simply tired. Too tired.

"Lira...?" My voice came out hoarse, barely more than a whisper, as though it had been scraped raw by some throat goblin looking for gold down there. Sleep was still trying to hold me down like invisible chains, dragging me back into the void that I had to fend off with great effort. "What... what time is it?"

"It's late—really late," she said, her voice wavering slightly. She knelt beside my bed, her hands trembling as they hovered over my shoulders, unsure whether to touch me or pull away. "I saw you come home in the morning... you looked strange. Pale, like you'd seen a ghost! I called out, but you ignored me..."

"You did?" I muttered, not remembering it at all. "I'm sorry. I probably zoned out."

"I'm not surprised now. And you never answered the door, so I—" she hesitated, her gaze dropping to the floor for a moment before she met my eyes again. "I was worried. I... I used the spare key."

Spare key? I wanted to ask, but I dropped it. Of course, they had one, but it was good to know. I should not keep anything valuable here in the future, then. Not because of her, but because of her parents... Those I won't trust. Thinking back... The last thing I remembered was stumbling through the door, my body giving out as I collapsed onto the bed. The battle with the tiger folk had drained me completely, leaving me hollow and aching by the time I got back home. Oh... And I didn't eat, did I? No wonder that my stomach twisted painfully, a gnawing hunger rising from within. My body demanded to refill my energies. Finally, looking back up again, I was surprised at the expression on Lira's face. She was terrified. But why? For me? No... There's no reason for her to be... Still, her hands were balled into fists, her knuckles white, and her lip trembled as she fought to keep her composure.

No one had ever looked at me like that before.

It was strange to be the recipient of such genuine concern. I had lived two lives now, and yet, never once had someone looked at me with such honest worry. In my past life, people had used me, tolerated me, and even pretended to care.

No. I am being dramatic. It wasn't always like that.

There was one time that someone had ever honestly looked at me this way—my ex-girlfriend before she left me, of course. Before she discarded me after multiple years of empty promises that only meant something for me.

Enough. The past is the past; I can't expect pity for things that don't matter anymore.

The thought sobered me up instantly, leaving a bitter taste rising in my throat. I clenched my jaw, pushing the thought away, focusing on the moment. That was then. This was now. Lira wasn't her. Lira was... probably different. But the thought of letting someone in again, of allowing myself to be vulnerable, made my chest constrict with uncertainty. Because I think... I would let it happen... Tsk.

"I'm fine," I said finally, though the dryness in my throat made the words sound hollow, even to my own ears. It was untrue.

"No," Lira answered and didn't seem to believe me either. Her eyes swept over my body, narrowing as they caught the faint traces of blood staining my shirt, something that I wasn't aware of yet. "No, you're not." Her voice was firmer now, a spark of determination cutting through her fear, replacing it. "You're hurt."

"Huh?" I frowned, my instincts kicking in, trying to check myself. "I'm not—"

Before I could finish, her small hands were already tugging at my shirt. I barely had the strength to resist as she lifted the fabric, her breath catching in her throat when she saw the injuries. I was also stunned because I had never felt them until now. Claw marks were lining my torso where the tiger had nearly caught me in his attack, thin scratches and bruises painting my skin, showing me that the battle was indeed real. And dangerous. Watching it with surprise, I suddenly realized how close that bastard got to disemboweling me. Luckily, the potion worked, and I was faster... So the wounds were shallow, but they were there, and the sight of them made Lira's stomach churn.

"Auriel! This—this isn't fine!" Her voice cracked, and she quickly looked away as though the sight of my injuries was too much to bear. Or... was she shy? I couldn't tell, but then she steeled herself, her muscles tightening as she turned back to face me. "Sit up. I'm cleaning this! No need to get sick from some nasty... nastiness!" She stood with sudden purpose, grabbing a basin from the small washstand nearby. "And don't argue. You're letting me do this!"

"Sure..." I sighed, knowing I didn't have the energy to fight her on it. Nor to really do it myself. So, I just sat up slowly, wincing slightly as my sore muscles protested against the movement. The cool air of the room hit my now naked skin, raising goosebumps as Lira dampened the cloth and began carefully wiping away the dried blood that was stuck to me. Her touch was gentle yet firm enough to scrap it off, dabbing at the wounds with careful gestures. The water was chilly against my skin, a soothing contrast to the heat of his injuries that I began to feel now that I was conscious of them.

Looking at her, she was so focused, biting her lower lip in concentration as she worked—kind of cute. I kept watching her, feeling oddly detached from the moment. Shouldn't this be embarrassing? It should be awkward, right? But I couldn't find it in me to feel self-conscious. Not that I could, but I thought she may, considering how things are in this world. I guess, at least. No matter. This was nice because there was a strange sense of comfort in her presence, a quiet reassurance.

As I relaxed, letting her take care of me, I noticed that I was right in my thoughts. Lira, by the time her worry subsided, realized that I wasn't really injured. Thanks to that, she was gradually going red in the face, her ears burning, yet she continued touching me, caring for me. The fact that I hadn't resisted was probably why she hadn't stopped or shown discomfort doing it, making her heart race, something that I could almost hear. I guess in this society, this kind of thing wasn't normal unless... unless there was something deeper.

Did... Did I make a mistake? Well, it was too late to say no to her. What I didn't know were the thoughts swirling in her mind:

"He trusts me this much?" she thought, swallowing hard as she tried to steady her trembling hands. The thought alone had sent a warm flutter through her chest, but it was quickly overshadowed by the worry that still gnawed at her. "What had happened to him? What could have caused these injuries?" She wanted to ask, but the words were caught in her throat. It had to be related to the Crows. And if it was... he wouldn't answer her anyway. He couldn't. So, for now, she focused on tending to his wounds, her touch as gentle as she could make it.

"Um..." She suddenly muttered, her eyes meeting mine, drawing her hands away. When she finally finished, she sighed in relief, setting the cloth aside. "There. That should help."

"It's already better." I nodded as I flexed my shoulders slightly, testing the soreness. "Thanks, Lira."

"Anytime..." She smiled, but then, as if remembering something, she perked up. "Oh! Wait here!"

Before I could ask what she meant, she darted out of the room. Did her shyness finally get a hold of her? Well, I barely had time to lean back against the headboard before she returned, carrying a small cloth-wrapped bundle. I already knew what it was; my thoughts were confirmed the moment she opened it. The scent of freshly baked bread filled the room, warm and inviting. My stomach growled loudly the moment the sweet smell hit my nose, my body betraying my hunger.

"Hungry?" she giggled, the sudden melody from her throat light and pleasant, like a balm against my tiredness. "I figured you'd be hungry, so I baked extra before closing!"

"You shouldn't have," I said as she sat beside me, my hand already reaching out, but she was faster. She tore off a piece of soft, warm bread and, without hesitation, held it up to my lips. I simply stared at her, blinking, now feeling I was the one getting flustered. "Lira... I can feed myself."

"Hush," she said with a little pout, her cheeks flushing slightly. "You're exhausted. Just let me do it... properly. You already let me bathe you!"

Bathe me? That is a bit of a stretch... but true. This was nothing then... So I gave in. She pressed the piece of bread against my mouth, and with an exasperated sigh, I finally took a bite. The taste of the warm dough and slight butter melted on my tongue, and for the first time since the battle, well, I guess since yesterday, I felt a sense of normalcy return to my life. What was happening now... It was a small thing, but it was lovely. I enjoyed it. I really appreciated it... I never knew I was so starved for the feeling we were sharing at that moment.

I think it made the food taste even better.

"Yummy?" Lira beamed, breaking off another piece. "See? Better, right?"

"It is tasty." I chewed slowly, nodding my head. "And yeah... I do feel better."

She smiled even more brightly as she kept feeding me in small bites, humming happily as if playing the role of a devoted little wife. It was odd—no, it was ridiculous—but for at least that night, I didn't mind. For once, I wasn't alone. For once, someone cared enough to check on me, and hell... She didn't ask for a favor. Maybe she will in the future; we will see... But, for now, I decided... that I would worry about it then, not now.

The now was for relaxing.