S2 Chapter 44 : I'll be gentle

The Ace and the Four Kings

Xyrine Jean's POV

A message notification lit up my phone screen.

1 message received.From: Louren

Xyrine, I'm sorry. Something urgent came up, but I'll follow as soon as I'm done here. Take care, okay? See you later.

I stared at the text, feeling a quiet sigh escape my lips.

"Baby, looks like it's just the two of us today," I murmured, placing a gentle hand on my stomach. "Uncle Louren won't be with us, and your daddy…" I paused, swallowing the lump rising in my throat. Last night's events flashed through my mind like a cruel reminder.

"And your daddy doesn't even know you exist."

Tilting my head back, I took a deep breath before forcing a smile. "But that's okay, right? Mommy's strong enough for the both of us. So hold on tight, okay?"

I ran my fingers over my belly, as if reassuring the little life growing inside me. Then, shaking off my emotions, I headed toward the wardrobe and pulled out a peach dress—one of the many my father had bought for me after I moved into the mansion.

A dress. Yes.

I had no desire to wear pants anymore; they felt too restricting, especially with my stomach beginning to round out—though for now, it only looked like I had just eaten too much.

"Oh, this looks cute," I murmured, running my fingers over the soft fabric.

After getting dressed, I glanced at my reflection in the mirror. Something about my face seemed… different. Rounder. Plumper. My cheeks, once defined, now looked fuller.

"Ugh, you look like a steam bun, Xyrine!" I groaned.

Shaking my head, I finished getting ready and stepped out of the mansion.

The garden was quiet, the air still heavy with the scent of morning dew. As I walked, my sneaker's shoelace suddenly came undone, forcing me to stop. I was about to bend down when I felt something cold land on my arm.

A raindrop.

I barely registered it before another followed. Then— Whoosh!

In an instant, heavy rain poured down, drenching everything in sight. But strangely enough… I wasn't getting wet.

Frowning, I looked up—only to see a pair of shoes standing right in front of me.

My heartbeat quickened.

Slowly, I lifted my gaze, and the moment my eyes met his, my breath caught in my throat.

"Spade…?"

He was standing there, holding an umbrella over me, his brows slightly furrowed.

"You're impossible, you know that?" he muttered, his voice tinged with mild annoyance. "Do you want to get sick? And what about the baby?"

Before I could respond, he handed me the umbrella without warning.

"H-Huh?"

Instead of answering, he crouched down in front of me. My heart pounded wildly as I realized what he was doing.

He was tying my shoelaces.

My mind went blank.

He didn't speak, only focusing on his task. Then, in a quiet voice, he muttered, "You're staring too hard. I might melt."

Feeling flustered, I averted my gaze.

"Done." He stood up, and so did I—only for us to end up too close, the umbrella handle being the only thing separating us.

I froze.

He was right there, his scent mixing with the rain-soaked air. For a moment, the world around us faded, leaving only the two of us standing beneath the umbrella.

Then—

"Awww!" I yelped as he suddenly tugged at both of my cheeks.

He chuckled. "What have you been eating to make your cheeks this fluffy?"

Feeling embarrassed, I looked down.

Was it wrong that I felt more flustered than offended?

"T-thank you, I should get going now," I stammered, desperate to escape before he noticed the redness creeping up my face.

I turned, but before I could take a step, his arm suddenly wrapped around my waist, pulling me back.

My breath hitched.

"Where do you think you're going?" His voice was firm, his palm resting gently over my stomach. "Can't you see it's still raining?"

My heart was racing too fast. What is he doing?!

Straightening myself, I turned to face him. "I—I have an appointment. I might be late."

"Where?"

"My OB. I have a check-up scheduled today." I fiddled with the hem of my dress, unable to meet his eyes.

"You're going alone?"

"I was supposed to go with Louren, but something urgent came up, so I'll just go by myself."

Spade's expression darkened. "What kind of boyfriend—what kind of father—does that?"

I quickly looked away. I wanted to tell him the truth. That he was the father. But I bit my tongue.

Instead, I forced a small smile. "I don't want to trouble you, but… could you at least walk me to my car? I don't have an umbrella."

"I'll take you."

My eyes snapped to his.

"W-What?"

"I said I'll take you," he repeated, his gaze unwavering.

"But what about—" I hesitated, nearly saying Monique.

"She's at work." His voice was even. "I didn't go in today because you're alone in the mansion. It didn't sit right with me."

Something about his words made my heart ache. I instinctively clutched my stomach as a faint pain surfaced.

"O-Oh, but you really don't have to—"

"I know I don't have to," he interrupted. "But I want to."

That made me pause.

Want?

The doctor's words echoed in my head—Don't overwhelm him.

I swallowed hard.

"Come on," he said, reaching for my hand.

I hesitated for a split second before placing mine in his. His fingers curled around mine, warm and steady.

And in that moment, I allowed myself to dream.

What if he never lost his memories?

Would things have been like this?

Would he have held my hand the same way? Would he have looked at me like this—like I still mattered?

Would he have stayed?

But reality was cruel.

Because right now…

He didn't remember me.

He didn't remember our story.

And worst of all—

He didn't remember his own child.

"Tender breasts?"

Spade and I instinctively turned to look at each other before quickly averting our gazes.

Argh! If I had known this would be the topic of my check-up, I would never have brought Spade along.

I glanced at the doctor just as she chuckled. "Don't worry, there's no need to feel embarrassed. That reaction is completely normal—and honestly, quite adorable—for first-time parents." She smiled reassuringly.

"Ah, he's not—"

I was about to correct her when Spade suddenly placed a firm but gentle grip on my arm, stopping me mid-sentence.

"Yes, I'm sorry. My wife and I are a bit ignorant about these things. Could you explain further?" he said seriously, his tone unwavering.

My wife?

Instead of contradicting him, I took a deep breath, calmed myself, and turned my attention back to the doctor.

"The second change is mood swings. Your wife may experience a wide range of emotions—one moment she might feel low-spirited and teary-eyed, and the next, she could be brimming with happiness."

"Yeah, and I think it's a pretty cute change for her," Spade remarked with a playful grin.

The doctor and I both turned to him, surprised.

"I'm sorry, please continue," he added quickly.

What on earth is he talking about? Can he not be like this right now?

"The third is food cravings. It's very common for expectant mothers to develop intense cravings for certain foods. At the same time, they may develop strong aversions to the smell or taste of other foods or even everyday substances."

"Hahahaha!"

The sudden burst of laughter made the doctor and me snap our heads toward Spade.

Is something wrong with his head—aside from the amnesia?

"Sorry, Doc," he said between chuckles, "it's just that what you said reminded me of something. My wife recently started hating the smell of oranges, and her food cravings have been all over the place. But honestly, I think it just makes her even cuter."

Wife?

Instead of getting annoyed that he was laughing at my cravings, I felt something else. A strange fluttering inside me.

"It's okay, Mr. Sy," the doctor said kindly, "but please pay close attention to this last one—it's the most important."

I straightened in my seat.

"Emotional distress and depression are common during this trimester, but they can be very dangerous. In extreme cases, they can even lead to miscarriage, which is most likely to occur in the early months of pregnancy."

"That won't happen, Doc!"

I turned to look at Spade. His voice was firm, his eyes locked onto the doctor's with an intensity that made my chest tighten.

How could he be so sure? He still couldn't even remember us.

"All in all, everything will be fine as long as you both take care of the baby. Just make sure to attend prenatal seminars and never miss your monthly check-ups, okay?" The doctor smiled warmly.

After thanking her, Spade and I walked out of the clinic.

"Why did you do that?" I asked as soon as we stepped outside.

"Do what?"

"Why did you pretend to be the father of my baby?"

He turned to face me, his gaze steady. "I don't know," he admitted, "I guess… I just didn't want people to think you were going through this alone. Especially not on your first check-up."

As he spoke, he reached out and ruffled my hair before casually walking ahead.

I stood frozen for a moment, watching his retreating figure.

You're wrong, Spade. The real father of my child is with us. Because you… are with us.

I quickly wiped away the tear that slipped down my cheek.

"Come on," he called back with a smile.

I hesitated. "Where are we going?"

"You'll see. Someone's waiting for you."

Someone's waiting for me? What does he mean?

The moment his hand reached for mine, an unexpected warmth spread through my chest. We hurried to his car, and before I knew it, we were driving back to the mansion.

When we arrived, Spade stepped out first and opened the door for me, extending his hand.

"Be careful," he said softly as I took his hand.

I couldn't help but smile. Was he serious? It was just a short step out of the car.

Even as we walked to the mansion's entrance, he never let go of my hand—and I wasn't complaining.

Just as we reached the door, Spade suddenly covered my eyes with his hands.

"Spade, I can't see anything!" I protested.

"Don't worry, I've got you."

That was all I needed to hear before my heart started racing.

"I trust you," I whispered as he guided me forward.

The moment we stepped inside, he removed his hands from my eyes.

"CONGRATULATIONS!"

I was almost stunned by what greeted us. Slowly, I let my gaze travel across the faces of those standing before me, all of them smiling warmly.

Ren, Tennessee, Ella—and a short distance away stood Louren, holding a bouquet of red roses.

Wait… wasn't he supposed to be in an emergency?

My eyes shifted from him to the thing that completely stole my attention. Scattered all over the floor were countless baby items.

I didn't know why, but I instinctively covered my face, curling up in a fetal position. And then, out of nowhere, tears streamed down my face—this time, not out of sadness, but overwhelming joy.

For so long, all I ever did was cry in pain. But today… today was different.

Hearing their collective "aww" only made me cry harder. I was still looking down when I felt someone wrap their arms around me.

"It's okay, Xyrine. Don't cry too much; it's not good for you," Louren's gentle voice murmured, prompting me to lift my head and return his embrace.

"Thank you so much, Louren. You have no idea how happy you've made me," I whispered between sobs.

He chuckled softly. "Uhm, I appreciate that, but this wasn't my doing."

I pulled away and looked at him in confusion.

"It was Spade," he said with a small smile.

Spade?

My gaze drifted past him until it landed on Spade, who stood there, smiling at me.

I was about to get up and walk toward him when he suddenly spoke.

"For the woman my friend loves, it's nothing."

I froze.

For the woman my friend loves?

A bitter smile formed on my lips. For a brief moment, I had forgotten our situation because I was too caught up in the happiness of it all.

"Anyway, I'll just go prepare the food," he added with a small wave before turning away.

"It's okay, Xyrine. One day, he'll remember," Ella said softly.

I turned to her, my eyes brimming with unshed tears.

"Yeah, and don't be too sad," Ren chimed in. "It's not good for you and the baby. Besides, what if it ends up looking like Ten?" he teased, making everyone laugh.

"Excuse me, Ren," Ten interjected, feigning offense. "And what if the baby does look like me? Don't you know this face is highly sought after by women?" he boasted.

I couldn't help but laugh at their banter. But as soon as my laughter subsided, I realized they were all staring at me.

"That's it—smile," Louren said warmly. "Because when you're sad, we all feel sad too."

"Exactly. And so what if he doesn't remember? The three of us are more than capable of being fathers to your baby," Ren added.

"Hahaha! And I'll be the most handsome dad of them all," Ten declared proudly.

Tears welled up in my eyes again, but this time, they weren't from sorrow.

"Thank you. Thank you all so much. I don't know what I'd do without you. If I were alone in this…" I trailed off as tears finally spilled down my cheeks.

"Argh! That's enough, Xyrine. You're making us cry too," Ten grumbled, turning his back.

"Yeah, no more crying. Let's focus on being happy," Ella suggested. "How about we take a trip out of town?"

We all turned to her in surprise.

"Nerd, you nailed it!" Ten smirked. "Your brain really is as thick as your glasses."

Ella shot him a glare.

"That sounds great, but where should we go?"

"Balisi Island," a voice answered.

We all turned to see Spade walking out of the living room.

"That's where I proposed to Xyrine," he said. "It's the perfect place to unwind."

Silence filled the room.

Louren reached for my hand, and I offered him a small smile, letting him know I was okay.

"Yeah, it's a great place," someone else chimed in. "Actually, that's also where my dad's feeding program project will be held for the local children, especially now that Christmas is coming."

We turned toward the entrance, where Monique stood, smiling. She had just arrived.

"Xyrine," Spade called.

But before I could meet his gaze, Monique wrapped her arms around him and kissed his cheek.

Louren's grip on my hand tightened.

"Wait, what's going on? Why does this feel like a party? And why are there baby things everywhere? Whose are these?" Monique asked, confused.

"They're mine," I answered quietly, keeping my gaze down.

She looked like someone had poured ice water over her. "H-how far along are you?" she asked, forcing a smile.

"Five months," Ella answered for me, her voice firm.

Monique visibly paled. "C-congratulations," she said awkwardly. "Oh well, my dad's project in Balisi is in three days. If you want to join, just let me know. I'm heading upstairs—I suddenly don't feel well."

"No, wait for me," Spade said. "Enjoy the night, everyone. I'll just accompany Xyrine to her room."

I lifted my gaze just in time to see him glance my way.

"Monique, congrats," he told her with a smile before turning away.

And as I watched him gently take Monique's arm to support her, I felt something inside me shatter.

A thousand invisible knives pierced my heart.

It was almost funny. Just moments ago, I was so happy, but now… now it felt like my entire world was crumbling again.

Happiness is a dangerous thing in times like these.

Because the moment you let yourself hope… the moment you forget the difference between stolen moments and reality…

You realize the truth.

And the truth always hurts.

3 days after at Balisi Island

As soon as we arrived in Balisi, I immediately looked for a place to throw up.

"I don't think you should have come here. This place is too far for someone in your condition," Louren said worriedly.

I smiled at him after rinsing my mouth. "I'm fine, really. Besides, I wanted to come because there are so many kids here. I don't know why, but I feel like being surrounded by children. It just seems so joyful, don't you think?" I replied with a grin.

I was caught off guard when he suddenly pinched my cheek. "You're so cute," he said, making me smile even more.

But my smile quickly faded when I felt someone staring at me.

I didn't know why, but my gaze instinctively landed on Spade. It was strange—he was looking directly in our direction, his brows furrowed. I glanced behind me, but there was no one there.

Weird.

By the time we arrived at the orphanage where we'd be staying, it was already evening. The place was beautiful and clean, almost like a hotel.

"We're so grateful that you made it today as President Montreal mentioned. On behalf of everyone here, thank you for your generosity. Aside from the donations your father made, we truly appreciate you and your friends volunteering for tomorrow's feeding program," one of the nuns said warmly.

"It's no problem at all. We're happy to help, and we want to bring joy to the kids, especially with Christmas just around the corner," I replied with a smile.

"The rooms you'll be staying in tonight are on the third floor. I have your keys here, so you can decide among yourselves who will room together. Please rest well." She handed me the keys before leaving the seven of us in the lounge.

"There are three keys, which means there are only three rooms," I noted, placing them on the center table.

Before I could say anything else, Louren suddenly grabbed my hand and picked up one of the keys.

"I'm sure you'll be fine staying with me tonight?" he asked, flashing a confident smile.

I was about to agree and smile back when someone grabbed my other arm.

"You can't!"

Everyone turned to Spade, who stood there, his jaw clenched, gripping my wrist tightly.

"Oops," Ren muttered under his breath, while Ten whistled beside him.

Realizing what he had done, Spade quickly let go. "I mean, if you and Louren share a room while Xyrine and I take another, that would leave your cousin alone with Ren and Ten," he explained hastily, avoiding my gaze.

Well, he had a point.

"Damn, man. It's not like we're going to take advantage of Ella. With glasses that thick, I doubt anything could even get through them," Tennessee joked.

"You have some nerve, Tennessee! You think you're handsome or something?"

"Watch, you two might end up together. Who knows?" Ren teased, making me chuckle.

"Shut up! You're all so noisy!" Spade snapped, his brows furrowed.

What was his problem? He wasn't acting like this before. Back at the mansion, he was always helpful and kind to me. But now, his mood had completely shifted ever since Louren started getting close to me.

Was he… jealous? The thought made me want to laugh.

"Then separate us from the girls," Louren said coolly, still smiling.

I smiled back at him. He was always so calm. But my expression faltered again when I felt Spade's intense gaze on me, his brows furrowed once more.

"No, I want to be alone," Spade said firmly. He grabbed a key and walked away without another word.

"Sorry about that, guys. I have no idea what's up with him either," Monique said apologetically.

With no other choice, we split up. Monique, Ella, and I took the first room, while Ten, Ren, and Louren shared the second. Spade, on the other hand, stayed alone in the third.

After settling in, we prepared to sleep while the boys planned to go bar-hopping at the beach.

"Why was he so upset?" I wondered as I lay in bed.

I closed my eyes, trying to fall asleep, but no matter what I did, I couldn't stop thinking about Spade. I kept tossing and turning until I felt the urge to use the bathroom.

I checked the clock beside me—it was already one in the morning.

Feeling dizzy from exhaustion, I reluctantly got out of bed. Despite my hesitation, I quietly stepped out of the room and headed to the bathroom. The dark hallway made my skin crawl, but I shook off the unease.

After finishing, I walked back to our room but suddenly stopped in front of Spade's door.

What was he doing? Was he already asleep?

I was about to continue walking when the door suddenly swung open, and a strong arm pulled me inside.

My breath hitched as everything happened so fast.

Wait… who was this?

My eyes widened in shock as I realized I was now inside Spade's room.

"X-Xyrine…" His voice was low and hoarse.

My heart nearly jumped out of my chest.

Wait… did I hear that right? Did he just call me Xyrine?

"S-Spade?" My voice trembled.

"I love you so much, Xyrine…" he whispered, his hands gripping my waist, our foreheads pressed together.

I wanted to believe he had regained his memories, but what if he had mistaken me for Monique because of the darkness?

"But I'm not Xyrine… I'm Monique," I whispered back.

"I know."

My heart nearly stopped. I gasped softly, catching a faint whiff of alcohol from him.

Was he drunk?

Wait, did he just say he knew?

Then why was he doing this?

"Please… just for tonight, let me believe you're Xyrine. My heart is telling me one thing, but my eyes are seeing something else. I'm so confused. I don't understand anymore," he murmured, his grip on me tightening.

Because I am Xyrine, Spade!

I wanted to scream the truth at him, but fear held me back.

"Spade, you're drunk. Let me go. I need to—"

Before I could finish, his lips crashed against mine, silencing me.

I didn't know why, but even though I wanted to resist, something deep inside me refused to.

I gasped when his lips trailed down to my neck. My entire body trembled when his hands slid beneath my shirt, his fingers undoing the clasp of my bra.

A shiver ran down my spine as his touch ignited something deep within me.

He suddenly lifted me and gently laid me on the bed.

I stared at his dark, smoldering eyes, the moonlight from the window casting shadows on his face.

A moment later, he leaned down and kissed me again, and this time, I kissed him back without hesitation.

My breath hitched when his hand slid lower, tracing the hem of my shorts.

"Spade, I'm pregnant…" I whispered, my voice barely audible.

He froze, staring down at me as if studying my face.

"Ah! Goddamn it!" he groaned, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "This is driving me crazy!"

Before I could respond, he suddenly pulled his shirt over his head.

"Wait, Spade! What are you—"

I gasped as he silenced me with another deep, searing kiss.

"Hush. I'll be gentle."