Self-denial is the most difficult

Cha Xiaoqing went to Germany, in my heart, it has long been an irreversible thing, although I have subconsciously accepted it, but I still feel very sad when I think of those scenes I have experienced, but I still forced a smile and said: "What time is the plane at night, I will see you off at the airport." "

 "Don't send it, this time I'm gone, I don't know when we'll be able to meet... Don't want to be too sentimental! "

 "Hmm... You take care of yourself over there too. "

 Cha Xiaoqing answered, and then we fell into silence together, Cha Xiaoqing hung up the phone before me, presumably she must be more sad than me, because from beginning to end, she didn't wait for me to say "I like you", when she recalled this paragraph between us, she would definitely feel regretful, just like Xiamen has never snowed; It's like being in that abandoned park, walking around and watching the flowers; It's like that off-the-beaten-track marina, a yacht forgotten by its owner...

 I put the phone on the table, and subconsciously looked up at the sign of the bubble tea shop, the word "lost" was particularly dazzling in the oblique sunlight, and after Jin Can, I was the second person left behind on this island.

 I lost my mind for a long time in the sound of the turbulent waves, and gradually fell into a trance... It was as if I saw a broken image in the sun's aperture, and the picture gradually moved, so I heard the sound of whipping and the noise of the crowd, which made me want to see it, but after all, I could not see the woman in my dream in transparent clothes again.

 Behind the sadness, there are always many literary and artistic ideas... If this life is missed because of humility, then the word "lost" must be written on the tombstone on the day I am dying.

 When I looked up, I realized that the person I was talking to was Tang Guo, and I couldn't help but have mixed feelings in my heart... If it weren't for such an unseemly thing that happened to Tang Guo by mistake, would I have the courage to say "I like you" to Cha Xiaoqing? Is it courageous to leave her behind, and then struggle together, fall in love together, and face all the pressure from the future together... What if the pressure is really that unbearable... I eloped with Cha Xiaoqing like crazy and fled to the ends of the earth... It doesn't matter what the is worldly, what the is displaced, as long as Cha Xiaoqing is willing... For what I want, for love, I'm so selfish, what's wrong with that?!

 But after all, that ridiculous night with Tang Guo made me imprisoned myself, I didn't want to tarnish Cha Xiaoqing's true feelings, I didn't deserve anything.

 Out of this mood, I avoided Tang Guo's gaze, and then replied, "I want to die!" "

 Tang Guo looked at me inexplicably, and then said, "Didn't I tell you, if you really feel too much pressure, we will transfer the store..."

 I ignored Tang Guo, then picked up the cigarette case on the table and walked towards the pier at the end of the island...

 This is one of the few times I show my emotional side in front of Tang Guo, I know it's not right, after all, Tang Guo is also a victim, but I have no other way to vent this depressed mood, I am hurt, it is emotional sadness... I lost a woman who was so kind to me.

 Isn't it? When she left, she was still thinking about how to solve my troubles, she introduced Uncle Wei to me, in essence, she was hurting herself, the problem of the bubble tea shop was solved, and I would not go to Germany with her, but she knew that this was my dream, so she did it anyway... It's easy to be a person, but self-sacrifice is the hardest!

 ...

 At 11 o'clock in the afternoon, Uncle Wei finally replied to my message, he asked me to wait for him at the "Jianfeng Building" in the city, and we made an appointment to meet at 12 o'clock.

 "Aftertaste, what are you thinking?"

 Out of respect, I arrived at the "Jianfeng Building" at half past eleven, and although the temperature outside was already very low, I still stood outside waiting for the wind chill... I didn't smoke either, because the stakes were high and I didn't want to give the other person a frivolous impression, so I didn't even use my phone to kill time, I just stood motionless...

 Respect, not only because the other party can help me, but more importantly, he is the person who was introduced to me by Cha Xiaoqing, and I will only respect him more than Cha Xiaoqing, which is a continuation of emotions.

 Especially when you are about to lose Cha Xiaoqing.

 "Boy, can you help me with a hand?"

 I turned my head to see a middle-aged man with leg problems standing next to me an electric tricycle with four or five boxes of seafood on it.

 Seeing that I didn't speak, he said to me with a bitter face: "We are delivering goods to the hotel, and my son originally did this work, but he has to accompany his daughter-in-law to do the prenatal checkup today, so I will temporarily take the ... I thought they would pick up the goods, so I called them and they had to let me deliver them myself... My legs and feet are inconvenient, how can I send them up! "

 I looked at the time, it was already eleven fifty, and there were only ten minutes left before the time I had agreed with Uncle Wei, so I hesitated a little; He thought I was unwilling, so he hurriedly took out a hundred yuan from his pocket and handed it to me, and then said, "Young man, this is your hard work, and I won't let you help in vain... I really couldn't help it, I asked several people, but no one wanted to... I made an appointment with the hotel to deliver the goods on time at 12 o'clock, this big customer, I really can't afford to offend..."

 Being at the bottom, of course, I can understand the bitterness of the bottom class, thinking that there are still ten minutes, so I gritted my teeth and said: "Cheng, I'll help you move up, and the money won't be needed... It's not easy for you to start a small business! "

 The middle-aged man said thank you again and again... I rolled up my sleeves and hurriedly unloaded the goods, for fear of delaying time, so I directly picked up two boxes at a time... I didn't expect the fishy, dirty water to flow down my neck... Suddenly, a chill came from my chest, this is really dirty work! But since I had already agreed, I still helped him deliver all five boxes of seafood to the 16th floor of the building.

 But at this time, it was already 12:10, and I wiped the water off my hands with a paper towel while looking in the direction of the parking lot...

 "Are you the aftertaste that Xiaoqing said?"

 I hurriedly turned my head to see that it was a middle-aged man with glasses and an intellectual temperament, I hurriedly stretched out my hand to him and said, "You are Uncle Wei, right?" ... I'm the aftertaste. "

 Uncle Wei glanced at me, I quickly retracted my hand again, I already smelled a fishy smell, when I came, I thought it would not be rude, but it was still rude...

 "You're ten minutes late... People don't stand without faith, your first impression on me is not good! "

 "No need to explain, no matter what your reason is, dishonesty is dishonesty..."