Chapter 8: The Twitter Body Battle Report Live from the Sherman Massacre

Eleanor converted the telegraph into a "19th century Twitter terminal" while Sherman's army was melting the organ of the Charleston church into bullets.CSA-02 was lying on the map, his mechanical pupils reflecting the burning towns: "Mom, the number of viewers in the live broadcast room exceeded 100,000...should we open up the incendiary bomb bounty channel? "

"Up the link!" She ripped off her girdle tie as a data cable and plugged it into the transmitter, and CSA-03 immediately converted the gallows into a bandstand. As the first wisps of smoke rose, the New York Times printing press suddenly spit out telegraph papers in a frenzy-each bearing the Internet message, Burn the Southie! Reward ten gold bars for air raid coordinates!

Eleanor is sticking merchandise QR codes on his helmet as Sherman bursts into the shot with a flamethrower: "Families, double-click on Lincoln's avatar to light up the little red heart, and we'll burn the Georgia grain silo when we get a million hearts!" The pop-up is instantly followed by "Burn! Burn! Burn!" The pop-up screen was instantly swept by "Burn! Burn! Burn!" as the Northern soldiers waved torches as if they were glow sticks.

"Mom, there's a reward of 200,000 dollars for a personal execution." CSA-01 drags in a captured Confederate general, and a child draws a steel "buy this item" stamp on the prisoner's forehead with a bloody finger. eleanor slips a noose around the man's neck, and suddenly lifts up her skirt for the camera - the display of the mechanical womb lights up! Countdown: 2140 minutes = redeemable for ten nude photos of Sherman.

The moment the gallows rope breaks, the live feed suddenly accesses a mysterious signal. A 3D projection of Abraham Lincoln (generated by CSA-04 brainwaves) floated over the fire, "Under the Anti-War Entertainment Act, you are sentenced to..."

"Sentenced to fuck you!" Eleanor snatches up the incendiary bomb and smashes it into the holographic projection, and the chunks of pixels engulfed by the flames reconfigure themselves into a strap-on advertisement for President Lincoln's same hanging rope! Free Emancipation Proclamation ass-wipe with your order! The reward amount instantly exceeded a million gold.

Suddenly, CSA-02 realizes that all the bounty IPs are pointing to the same coordinates - the White House cellar cryopod. The kid ripped open Sherman's uniform, and the general's heart was clearly implanted with the same mechanical heart as CSA-01. "They used our source code to make the army..." cried CSA-03, ripping off his own fingers to reveal a miniature missile launcher, "Mom, we're the original stock of the Federation!"

Eleanor copped a burning beam and stabbed it through the live feed curtain, revealing rows of cloned soldier factories in the back. Each incubation pod was soaked with CSA series clones, and the assembly line was soldering Tiffany rings into their eye sockets. "Thanks to the old timers for swiping the rockets," she sneered into the camera, "now for the real technique - buying the weapons that will kill you with bounty money!"

The broadcast suddenly went black as Sherman's army began to turn their guns to blast their own people. The last line of telegraphic code that flashed sent the nation into a frenzy: one gram of human blood gold for every ten abusive pop-ups, click the link to pledge your children's inheritance!

Late at night, Eleanor rummages through the charred ruins of the live feed for her diary. Charred pages reveal a new rule: "When the number of likes exceeds the number of deaths, you will spawn a fetus that will control the nation's power grid." Suddenly, the mechanical womb convulses violently, and the display pops up with a horrifying note: The current bounty has been automatically converted to pregnancy acceleration - time remaining: 140 minutes.

Three hundred miles away, the Lincoln clone is live-streaming a strip in the burning Parliament building. The CSA series of mechanical eyeballs are stacked at his feet, and the shopping cart link reads, Presidential Certified Hangman's Rope Inventory: 2,140 (discounts unlocked for each viewer eliminated).