JUDE, IS YOUR WISH NOW TO TORMENT ME UNKNOWINGLY?

MIKO

It was supposed to be an innocent hangout.

But then I felt that I didn't want him to leave my side, so I told him I would help wash his hair.

Something that shouldn't be so intimate shouldn't be so private. But as I watch him eyes closed, neck exposed to me as he makes those sounds, I realize I might not have thought this through.

My eyes drift to his pale neck on their own accord, following a droplet of water as it rolls down his neck to his wide- neck shirt that is slightly shifts and I can see his collarbone.

He is so sexy … so …

"Is it done?" his question pulls me out of my reverie, and I raise my eyes to his only to collide with his brown ones.

My heart is hammering so fast in my chest. He has caught me checking me out.

"Not yet," my voice comes out raspy and low.

I might have imagined it, but his gaze falls on my lips for just a second, which made me pull them between my teeth subconsciously.

Fuck, I can't do this or else I might mess everything up.

"Did my shirt get wet?" he asks me looking at my eyes, something fleeting in them but it's gone just as quick.

"No," I clear my throat, taking the shower head and start to rinse his hair. "I think it's good now."

"Really?"

"Yeah, your hair is very blonde now," I try chuckling to lift the tension between us. I can feel my whole body sweating. It's too hot in here.

Jude smiles and sits upright as I hand him one of my cotton towels. "Thank you for this. I don't know what I could have done without you."

How can I make him say that to me again and again?

I stand next to the mirror and watch him stand up and check himself out."

"It's so good!"

"The colour fits you perfectly." I mean it. Before, he looked so good as a brunette, especially against his fair skin. Now, he looks radiant, his skin tone going so well with the colour.

I take the blow dryer, set it on a low heat, and start to dry his hair. I am taller than him by a few inches, so it's no problem even as we do this standing.

But then he closes his eyes again and leans on my touch which makes my brain stop for the second time tonight.

I have to force myself not to get lost under this radiant boy's spell again. For all I know, he is straight, which I think is strange, but I could be wrong. I have never felt the way I feel when I am around him.

I feel calm, there is an ease that surrounds me whenever he is next to me and his smile is so bright, so warm. I get butterflies when I see him but then it settles into something that makes me almost breathless because of the euphoric feel that is forcing to burst out.

I know if I follow that feeling, I might not survive it, let alone the group.

It's intense, raw, and pure, yet very alien to me.

It's scaring me.

I have always been a loner, opting to be a playboy when I need some of my needs met or when I am feeling lonely. But as soon as the girls and boys all walk out, the feeling that never left to begin with creeps in fully and settles in my chest.

When Jude is next to me, I breathe easier; the loneliness is a thing that's forgotten.

It's a dangerous feeling, to feel like that about someone I haven't known for more than a few days. Yet here I am, taking any chance I can get to touch him and be close to him.

I put down the dryer once I am finished, taking a step back to admire my handiwork and also put some space between us.

"I now look like an idol," Jude smiles at me through the mirror.

"Feel better?"

"Yeah," he looks down at the sink, a thoughtful look on his face. "I needed tonight. Thank you for being the perfect distraction."

I will be your distraction any day, any time if you ever need me, no questions asked.

"Sure. Anytime."

Jude walks out of the bathroom, and I pause by the door. "I am going to take a quick shower."

"Sure don't mind me. I might go back to my room anyway."

"You don't have to leave if you still feel like hanging out. I am a night owl so I kinda stay up till late." More like I can't sleep unless I take prescribed sleep inducers.

"Okay," he sits on the couch again and takes the remote. "I sort of don't feel like being alone anyway."

 I smile as I close the bathroom door, feeling so nervous.

I am about to get naked when he is in the other room. The thought alone makes me hard, my skin breaking in Goosebumps as I remove my clothes.

Why am I acting like a horny teenager? Because you are one?

I take a cold shower, wearing my low hanging sweats before I step out to get my hoodie that's on the bed, towel in hand as I dry my hair.

My steps falter when I see Jude asleep on the couch, remote in hand, his now blonde hair peeking from … my hoodie.

The position he is sleeping in looks so uncomfortable, so I do the most natural thing in the world.

Putting the towel around my neck, I walk bare feet across the room to the couch, where I lean down and carefully lift the sleeping boy in my arms, bridal style.

Jude doesn't wake up, but he makes a small noise, burying his face on my neck. I freeze, heart hammering in my chest, waiting for him to wake up and realize what he has done. But he doesn't. He is out.