Chapter 5
I hadn't meant to spy on Zavi, yet there I was, standing before his door with my ear pressed against it, trying to catch fragments of a conversation I wasn't meant to hear. I had been sitting with Priya by the pool in her backyard, enjoying the warmth of the evening sun, when a figure caught my eye. It was someone I had never seen before, tall and imposing, with greying hair and wearing a uniform that seemed official—like something a soldier or an officer would wear. My curiosity flared, and without thinking, I excused myself from Priya, claiming I needed to grab something from upstairs. But instead of heading straight to my room, I found myself standing near Zavi's door, listening intently.I felt a pang of guilt for eavesdropping, but not enough to make me stop. The low murmur of voices drifted through the door, but the words were unintelligible, lost in the thick silence of the house. My heart raced, my curiosity pushing me further, even as I told myself it was wrong. As I leaned in closer to catch a better glimpse of whatever conversation they were having, I nearly lost my balance and stumbled forward. The door creaked open suddenly, and I froze, gasping as I found myself face-to-face with the man I had been trying to eavesdrop on."Sorry, I was just passing by," I stammered, my face flushing a deep shade of red. The man's intense eyes met mine, and for a split second, I felt the weight of his gaze—sharp and scrutinizing. It wasn't just awkward because I was caught by Zavi; no, it was worse that it was this stranger, someone I didn't know, someone who seemed to hold an air of authority that made my skin prickle.The man said nothing to me but looked past me toward Zavi. His frown deepened, and there was a tension in the air that made me feel even more out of place. I took a small step back, about to make my hasty retreat, but the man muttered something to Zavi, his voice low and serious. I didn't stay to hear the rest. Instead, I hurried down the stairs, my heart pounding in my chest. I couldn't believe I had been caught, and by someone so intimidating at that.Later that night, as I sat in the living room, trying to focus on my homework, I heard Zavi's voice behind me. The sound startled me so much that I nearly jumped out of my seat."Why aren't you asleep yet?" he asked, his tone casual but still carrying an undertone of something unreadable.I yelped, placing a hand over my chest to calm my erratic heartbeat. "You scared me," I muttered, trying to recover from the shock. My eyes strained in the dim light, searching for him in the darkness. The small desk lamp above me illuminated only a sliver of the room, casting long shadows that seemed to stretch toward me. Zavi stood in the archway, leaning casually against the wall, his legs crossed with that effortless, intimidating posture of his. In the darkness, his presence was like a shadow that both comforted and unnerved me. He was the kind of guy that made every girl's heart race, but in that moment, standing in the shadows, he felt more like something to be feared than admired."I had some school work," I explained, still flustered. "Priya finished hers already, and I didn't want to bother her by studying in her room.""Your mom working the night shift again?" His question was casual, but I could tell there was more beneath his words.I nodded, my eyes still trying to adjust to the darkness. "Yeah."The silence stretched between us, and I shifted uncomfortably on the sofa, feeling his gaze on me. Zavi never really gave me his full attention, and the weight of it now made my skin crawl in the most peculiar way. I wasn't used to being the subject of his focus, and it left me feeling self-conscious, almost exposed."Well?" he prompted, his voice suddenly sharp, breaking the silence.I swallowed hard. "What were you doing outside my room today?" he asked, and his tone was no longer casual. There was something deeper, something that made my stomach knot.I hesitated, but I knew that with Zavi, honesty was always the best option. He saw through any lies anyway. "I was curious," I admitted, my voice small. I could feel my cheeks burning with embarrassment, but I stood my ground.Zavi's expression hardened. He walked out from the shadows and into the small pool of light where I sat, towering over me. My toes curled involuntarily as his harsh eyes locked onto mine. The intensity of his gaze made me feel both small and strangely drawn to him."You could have been killed," he said, his voice low and threatening. "Just because I let you live doesn't mean every Ashujan you come across would do the same."I opened my mouth to protest, to explain myself, but nothing came out. I felt paralyzed under his stare, like I couldn't breathe. His words hung in the air like a threat, a warning, but it wasn't just his words that left me shaken. It was the force of his presence, the anger simmering beneath the surface, that left me struggling to find something intelligent to say.Somehow, despite the fear coiling in my chest, there was also a strange pull in my stomach, an attraction that was both alarming and undeniable. It was like a storm brewing—intense, dangerous, and irresistible.Zavi had made the decision to complete his master's degree in a different country, and I had convinced myself that his absence would bring me a strange sense of relief. After all, it was Zavi—the person who had both tormented and consumed my thoughts for so long. I thought his departure would free me from the constant emotional turmoil he brought. But as the days passed, the thought of not seeing him anymore twisted something inside me, leaving me feeling inexplicably empty. A sense of loneliness gnawed at me, more profound than anything I could have anticipated.It was a week before they were scheduled to leave, and I found myself standing in the far corner of his room, uncertain of what I was even doing there. My hands trembled as I wrestled with the question that had been weighing on me for days. I needed to know if Ashu could stay behind—could he remain here with me, where he belonged, or would he be taken away, too? I didn't know how to ask, or if I even should, but the silence in the room felt oppressive, and I knew I had to say something.Zavi had been sitting by the window, his back turned to me, the quiet hum of the room only adding to the tension. I was sure he had seen me standing there in his doorway, but he chose to ignore me, as if pretending I didn't exist was easier than facing the inevitable goodbye.Ashu was perched on the bed, staring at me with his golden eyes. His gaze was steady, though I couldn't tell if he was trying to gauge my thoughts or if he simply didn't care. Perhaps, in that moment, he was wondering if I had finally lost my mind."Are you going to take Ashu with you?" I finally managed to choke out, my voice barely above a whisper. I waited for a response, but when none came, I spoke again, this time louder, hoping to force my words into the stillness between us. "Are you taking Ashu...?"Zavi's response was sharp and angry, cutting through the air like a knife. "I heard you!" His voice was colder than I expected, laced with a venom that was hard to miss. When he turned around, his eyes were filled with seething frustration. "What do you think? Of course, he is coming with me."The words hit me like a slap, leaving me speechless. I opened my mouth to argue, to say something, anything, but all my words failed me. "But..." was all that escaped my lips."What? Did you really think I would leave him with you?" Zavi's tone was bitter, as if the idea itself was absurd.I stood there, frozen, my mind scrambling for something to say, some kind of response that would make him understand. But with Zavi, the right words never came. I should have been prepared, but his presence always rendered me helpless. And then, I realized—I was crying. The hot, salty tears slid down my cheeks without warning. I wiped them away furiously, not wanting him to see how deeply his words had affected me, but the tears kept coming, as if my body refused to stop grieving something I couldn't explain.When I finally looked up again, my eyes burned from the relentless scrubbing, and my vision blurred. But even through the haze, I saw Zavi staring at me, his expression unreadable. For a fleeting moment, I thought I saw something in his eyes—something close to sympathy—but the moment passed as quickly as it had come. He walked past me, his focus shifting to Ashu, who had remained silent throughout the entire exchange."I warned you not to get attached," Zavi said, his back to me as he bent to caress Ashu's fur. The softness of the gesture was at odds with the harshness of his words. "Ashu is not and will never belong to anyone but me. He is the Avatar of Goddess Shakti, given to me in order to assist in taking care of my world. He is not a plaything, and it's important that you forget he ever existed."His voice didn't just sound like a request—it was an order, a command meant to be obeyed. My heart lurched in my chest, panic seizing me. I didn't care if Ashu was the Avatar of a Goddess or if he had some celestial destiny that kept him tied to Zavi's world. To me, Ashu was more than that—he was the only one who truly understood me. The only one who had ever been there for me in a way that no one else had. Ashu made a soft, almost mournful noise, and if I didn't know better, I would have sworn he didn't like the idea of leaving me either.Seven days later, Zavi and Ashu were gone. Zavi didn't return home for the next three years. He called his family every now and then, checking in, but for the most part, he was a ghost in our lives. His absence was a cold, empty space that I couldn't fill. His family drifted from him, and he from them, as if the distance between us had slowly begun to erase all the connections we once had.I tried to reach out to him. I texted him, asking about Ashu, wondering how he was doing, if he was okay. I called, hoping he would answer, but Zavi never responded. The silence between us was suffocating, but I refused to give up, even as each unanswered message made the reality of our distance more painful to face.Though I missed Ashu terribly, and the ache of his absence never truly went away, the pain gradually began to numb over time. It became a dull, constant ache, one that I learned to live with. My life settled into a rhythm of monotony, a series of motions that helped me push through each day. I threw myself into my studies, focusing on academics as a way to escape the emptiness that lingered in the corners of my mind.I hated myself for it. For still loving him. For still caring about a man who seemed like a ghost, a memory slowly fading away. A man who claimed to come from another world—one that was so far removed from mine that it felt like he had never existed at all. It wasn't just Zavi I mourned; it was the idea of him, the version of him that had once felt real to me. And with time, the truth of his origins—his being from another world—seemed more and more like a distant fantasy, a story I had made up to explain my attachment. I tried to convince myself that Ashu had never existed, that he was just a figment of my imagination, a way to justify the loneliness that consumed me.It was easier to believe that, to bury the truth deep within me. It was better than mourning the loss of the only true friend I had ever known—the only companion who had made me feel less alone. But no matter how hard I tried to push the memories away, they lingered. Ashu and Zavi, both of them slowly slipping into the realm of memories, becoming things of the past that I could never fully let go.