Chapter 12-Socialized Removal Procedures

Alarming red light stained the nutrient solution the color of menstrual blood as Arya's brain tissue convulsed in the incubation chamber. The real-world robotic arm was stabbing the causality syringe into the pod, the Klein bottle structure of the needle tip capable of piercing three thousand parallel consciousnesses at once.

"Forty-two minutes and seventeen seconds left." Ramon's mechanical heart beeped in the sea of consciousness. They were trapped in the maze of beta-19's cerebral sulcus gyrus, their feet treading on sticky memory medulla, each step splashing with waves of childhood trauma.

Arya suddenly tripped over the Riemann Conjecture and fell into the prime number cloister. The Fibonacci series on the wall suddenly explodes in length, wrapping her into a cocoon of Gödel's incompleteness theorem. As Raymond slices through the number-theoretic vines with his Bayesian tentacles, he discovers a crying baby wrapped inside the cocoon - which turns out to be a shrunken version of β-19 proper!

The baby suddenly spits out its Turing-complete pacifier, and the entire labyrinth begins to collapse into a nursing room. Black holes in diaper form are devouring logic formulas, and thermodynamic milk bottles spew out entropy-increasing streams of air that burn Ramon's mechanical skin.

"Be a good girl and drink your grandma..." Arya grabbed the Klein Bottle milk bottle, the Kingslayer virus inside humming a lullaby. When the nipple touched the baby's lips, the real world outside the incubation chamber suddenly trembled--three hundred nurse cyborgs collectively danced the mechanical dance of the Great Compassion Mantra, and the scalpels formed a mandala formation.

The baby's pupils suddenly split into Cantor sets, and gorillas of the Infinite Monkey Theorem crawled out of every crevice. They pound Ramon's chest with probabilistic typewriters, printing the Instructions for the Removal Procedure on the metal surface, "Step 3: Soak the Love Module in the Copenhagen Interpretation Solution..."

Arya rips open the baby's mathematical diaper to reveal the wormhole entrance inside. They tumble into the Quantum Disco where a funeral is being held, and the Gravitational Wave Oboe of the Three Body Fleet plays the Wedding March. The Mayan sun god scatters supernova ashes onto a hopscotch board, and the Buddha Brass Band plays the disk with the Mantra of the Past.

"Come on!" Arya jumped onto a stage built from the Uncertainty Principle and ripped off a Klein bottle of intestines to use as a microphone, "Give the removal program a funeral!"

Ramon's mechanical skeleton automatically disassembled into a racking drum, causing an extra crack in the real-world incubation chamber with each beat. As the death metal riff reaches a crescendo, the beta-19 baby suddenly climbs into the beatbox, rubbing sparks out of the karma dial.

The quantum foam of the disco floor suddenly rumbles into a diaper-shaped volcano of antimatter. Arya picks up the screaming beta-19 baby and shoves him into the crater, "Pull a big one for mommy!"

The baby's cry triggers a vacuum phase change, and the erupting excrement turns out to be a myriad of microscopic universes. Each universe reenacts their love affair, and Ramon's mechanical heart suddenly grows an umbilical cord connecting all the universes to Arya.

"Warning! Socialization progress breaking through critical point!" The mechanical arm in the real world suddenly goes berserk and changes the karma injector to self-destruct mode. The moment Arya saw the countdown go to zero in the Sea of Consciousness-

00:00:00

Initiate Ultimate Socialization: format all emotional modules

The entire Quantum Disco begins to pixelate as the Buddhas melt into a string of sutra gibberish. Arya grabs Ramon's Bayesian tentacles in the flood of data deletion and injects the last of the Godslayer virus into his cracked mechanical heart.

"Remember..." Her body was disintegrating into a Higgs field fluctuation, "We once loved each other in the junkyard of all universes."

Ramon wrapped her quantum remnant in a Klein bottle heart and pressed the last chord in absolute nothingness. This vibrational frequency would, 13.7 billion years later, become the microwave background radiation of some fledgling universe.

And in the ruins of the real world, the beta-19 incubation pod suddenly burst open.

A baby covered in Godslayer slime crawls out of the wreckage.

The birthmark of the Law of Karma on his forehead.

Arya and Ramon's

last hickey.