Pew Pew

One look and I already guessed who this mofo is. He had short black hair and a decent-looking appearance, but I was still better-looking. And a smug I so wanted to wipe out of his face. If I'm guessing it right, this guy is supposed to be my asshole older brother.

"So, you've survived, useless Bruce."

I've learned some key information with that one short sentence of his. First, even though I am on the Murim side of this world, my name was still somehow Bruce and not something cool like Tang San. Second, I have been in an event that almost killed me. And the third and most important one is that, I am the fucking useless child. Really? Couldn't the Gods have made this body a genius from the start? Now, I have to grind and do some bullshit quests from this system that calls itself System.

Without recollection of what happened for me to end up in a coma, I scratched the back of my head, and with a weird smile, "I guess, I did, brother," I replied.

The asshole's face became red. I'm not an expert in human emotions but he sure does look mad fuming to me.

"Who gave you the right to call me brother, scum?"

'Oh fuck. Of course, we are not in a lovey-dovey relationship,' I thought.

I heard the loud sound of someone rushing towards us. It was the woman from earlier who kept calling me young master.

"Young master Hou Wen," she muttered before bowing toward my 'brother'.

Hearing his name, I realized that my name must be Hou Bruce, it didn't sound so nice once I thought about it. Sounded kinda like I'm someone who sells my body for silver, gold, or whatever this world's currency is. Well, this world should be filled with 'otherwordly' beauties, so I guess it wasn't so bad.

"Don't you dare utter my name with that filthy mouth of yours."

Hou Wen's words shook her to her core, unable to even graze him with her line of sight. She was trembling, yet she remained standing there, trying to take a glimpse at me. Her face, though filled with fear, still was painted with strokes of worry towards me. 

It might sound like a typical trope of a sad main character, but it was truly the second time I've ever felt someone cared about me more than themselves. The last one was with my dear friend Bob, but it is a stupid story for another time.

I was pissed and badly wanted to smack the shit out of Hou Wen's face. But, granted that it wasn't long since I was bedridden and it doesn't take a genius to figure out that this guy must have something to do with it, I only imagined the smacking inside my head. 

My brother's disgusted face turned into a smirk, "Now that's the familiar glare," he said. I guess I didn't notice that I was glaring at him. The real Bruce must've always done it. Well, I understand. This guy's a sight for sore eyes. And I mean looking at the bastard gives me one.

"I guess you're back to your senses. Keep glaring like the dog you are."

I don't know if it was due to the internet's influence or if I have really turned into a degenerate, but his words both sounded weird and gave me a disgusting feeling. He was still speaking when all of a sudden a screen popped up.

"As a welcome gift for the sole user, the Gods have decided to allow you to bring one item from your previous world. Please decide quickly as this chance for a gift will vanish after the timer."

Either the Gods were stingy as hell or this asshole system is just pure trash. The timer it was talking about was a mere fucking five seconds. My rage gradually increased, as the system also counted the seconds.

'The gun used by cowboys – a revolver. A loaded one.' I thought. But not long after, I realized that I should've gone for a rifle with infinite rounds. As I was about to change my choice, the system already congratulated me and sent the item to my "magical storage". After that, it asked me for a name so I could summon it but I couldn't think properly because of the situation.

Pissed was an understatement. Hou Wen's nonstop blabbering kept increasing my temperature. I was a kettle left too long under the maximum fire of a stove. In my head, I imagined squishing Hou Wen's face to alleviate my anger. Only, it wasn't really in my head. My biggest mistake was that I only realized it after smothering his face with my hands. I turned that shit into clay. Of course, he was angered. 

All I could remember next was a fast and extreme pain in my abdomen, then a crushing sound and pain in my back before my consciousness left me.

When I woke up, I saw my room's relieving ceiling for the second time. Relieving because I could've woken up in a hospital with my limbs broken and drowning in debt due to the fees. Thankfully, I was still in this other world. The next greatest thing was the girl from earlier sitting on a chair beside me. She was asleep with her head on my bed. Her aroma made my thing slowly rise. But, it's not the time for that.

I sat up, 'Hey shitty system, how do I use my gun?' I thought. 

"You haven't given your magical item a name yet, please tell me its name."

"Pew pew madafaka," I replied with a funny tone.

"Registered."

"No, wait– fuck."

I asked if the System was advanced enough to let me rename my revolver with six bullets.

"No."

Before I get even more pissed, I decided to let it be.

"How do I summon it?"

"You can summon your item, 'Pew pew madafaka', by calling its name while imagining it."

When I did what the System said, muttering the name and imagining a revolver, it appeared in my hand. It was the first time I held one so I was careful not to fire it by accident. The many times I saw it in movies and online videos helped me distinguish how to confirm the bullets inside. Six shots, that's all I had before I could beat someone with my fists faster than bullets.

Now that it was peaceful without the barking of Hou Wen, I've had the time to ask the system about many things. 

"Do I have stats like in a video game?" I asked.

The system replied with a question mark. I guess I wasn't in that kind of situation. Next on the list was when and how would I receive a quest from the System.

"Quests that will boost your prowess will appear when conditions are met."

"What conditions?"

"Conditions for quests are set by the Gods and I am not permitted to disclose it."

After not getting a good answer, the last thing I asked was how I could learn magic or other martial arts. Basically, I can learn martial arts in a few ways; first, by asking someone to teach it to me, second was learning from books, and last one was by defeating someone with said martial arts. Learning magic is also quite similar, but I was told that I still do not have the basic requirements to learn one. I guess it was because I am on the Murim side and the real owner of this body didn't learn how to use mana.

As I was deep in my thoughts, I heard the girl groan and stretch her hands. I immediately hid my revolver behind me.

"System, how do I return it?" I asked in my thoughts.

"To return a magical item, you must utter its name and say return."

I did as the System said and the gun was back in its place. Then, the girl rubbed her eyes before looking at me and widened them.

"Young Master!" She yelled as she jumped to hug me.

Although I was startled, I couldn't complain as I enjoyed the hug and the thought that someone cared for my well-being. But, I guess my thing enjoyed it more than I did as it continued to rise while I felt her knockers around my abdomen. Although it calmed down when I heard her sniff. The real Bruce must've been kind and had a good relationship with his servant for her to cry for his safety.

After letting her cry for a while, the girl let go of me and apologized.

"It's fine," I said with a smile. She responded with a beautiful smile of hers. Our exchange made me realize how real this was. People here are people, complex and real, far different from my views when it was me reading the page of a novel.

Acting coy, "I think I've lost my memory," I said.

"D–did young Master Hou Wen hit you hard?" The girl asked with a worried expression.

"No, it was even before that."

Convinced that what I told was the truth, the girl explained what happened. She said that I challenged Hou Wen to a duel because I saw him drag her by the hair. Of course, I lost and was gravely injured.

"What was your name?"

She became frantic, asking me how much of my memory I had lost. I told her that I couldn't remember almost everything.

"My name's Han Mei, your faithful servant." She said with a gratified expression.

I smiled and said, "I'm glad to have met you again, Mei."

Mei's smile turned wider as she held both of her cheeks trying to stop it from showing. I found it cute and couldn't stop myself from grinning. Then, Mei continued to feed me information that I should have already known if I was the real Bruce of this world.

"You gave this to me when I turned seventeen," she said while showing me a bracelet with a green Jade.

With a sudden realization, "Wait, how old are you?" I asked.

As an actual twenty-four-year-old, my heart pounded, and cold sweats began to pour down. 

It's a different world. The set of morals when it comes to marriage or anything sexual could be far different. Still, while waiting to hear her age, I was imagining an incoming raid with fully armed people waiting behind the door to say, "FBI, open up!"

Mei pouted, which was cute.

"I turned eighteen a month ago. A year older than you, young master."

"You're… eighteen?" I said with a sigh of relief.

Still with a cute smile, Mei nodded.

Then, a knock came from the door. I jolted in shock while Mei stood up. When She opened it, a typical extra guy with a bowl cut informed me that the patriarch had arrived.