Chapter 39: No Diffing The Toad With Rizz

Chapter 39: No Diffing The Toad With Rizz

🍷 BITTER WINE ARC (FANG YUAN'S DESPERATE HUNT)

Fang Yuan sat in the tavern with that sigma male rizz, interrogating the shopkeeper while sipping mid wine. The bitter shell wine situation was looking skibidi:

Full Context Restored:

The wine comes from special black conches found only in Bai Village's deepest ponds (their secret spot)

These conches:

Swallow sand/rocks and poop out liquid depression (bitter water)

Need 3+ years aging before brewing (patience = nonexistent)

Final product smells like grandma's medicine cabinet but hits different

Shopkeeper's NPC Behavior:

"Young master...new owner paying us in peasant bucks 😭"

Fang Yuan's response:

YEETS wine jar (critical hit 💥)

"Your suffering is skill-based matchmaking"

Meanwhile in NPC Gossip Land:

🐸 River Swallowing Toad Drama:

Blocking the Huang Long River's side quest (tributary)

Current position threatening:

Eastern farmlands (clan's breadbasket)

Underground spirit spring (their whole economy's gyatt)

Estimated stats:

Weight: 80,000 jin (absolute unit)

Sleeps 20 hours/day (mood)

🐸 TOAD LORE DUMP (JIANG FAN'S SADGE STORY)

Fang Yuan remembered this past life lore while sipping his L wine:

Protagonist: Jiang Fan (some random fisherman NPC)

His Glow-up:

Finds "dead" toad blocking his fishing grind 🎣

Daily therapy sessions ("We both gonna get fired 😔")

Toad wakes up and vomits seafood buffet 🦀

Enough fish to flex on his boss

Literally saved his gyatt

Becomes mortals' hero with pet toad

Gets ratioed by jealous Gu Masters ☠️

Toad Game Mechanics:

Gu aura = insta-rage (flood mode activated)

Must be woken by pure strength (no hacks)

Solo push only (squad attempts = cringe)

🏔️ CURRENT TOAD CRISIS (CLAN MALDING)

Emergency Meeting Highlights:

Chi Shan takes the L (failed push = skill issue)

Peasants rioting at gates (early apocalypse vibes)

Elder Brainrot Suggestions:

Execute NPCs (classic Gu Master W)

Call Xiong Clan (biggest L imaginable)

Chi Shan's Sigma Moment:

"There's one guy stronger...Fang Yuan"

Elders: "WHO?! 🤨"

Real Elder Reactions:

Chi Lian & Mo Chen: "The Relic Gu waster?! 🤨" (their factions took the L)

Clan Leader Bo: "This stubborn brat needs polishing." (sigma grindset detected)

Internal Affairs Elder: "Bro fails every mission on purpose 💀" (true troll behavior)

Bro's Reputation:

Arena Champion (clapped Fang Zheng no diff)

Dual Boar Gu Stack (🐗+🐗 = unstoppable with tung tung tung sahur phonk)

Professional Mission Failer (refuses to elaborate)

🍷 TAVERN SCENE (NPCs TAKING THE L)

Shopkeeper & Waiters: (still salty about wine jar incident)

"Karma came fast! He'll get clapped by the toad!"

"We glazed him as different but he's just Ohio trash!"

Random Hater Gu Master: (Drops primeval stone)

"Keep slandering him, I'll reward you 👀"

(Later executes them all when Fang Yuan succeeds) 📉 Character Development

Twitch Chat:

🤡 "NPCs when Fang Yuan gets the W"

⚰️ "Talk shit about Fang GOAT = get moonbladed"

🐸Hi Toad

The Setup:

River Swallowing Toad Stats:

Size: School bus 🚌

Weight: 48 tons (absolute unit)

Sleeps 20 hours/day (mood)

When Fang Yuan approached the Ohio River Toad, all his Gu wormscowered:

Liquor worms: curled up like scared kittens 🐱

Black Boar Gu: fell out of the air (no cap)

Moonglow Gu: hid its glow (ghosted)

Except one!!!

 Spring Autumn Rizz - Still sleeping peacefully like nothing's wrong (main character energy)

Fang Yuan's thoughts:

"Could just flex my Rank 6 aura and scare it... but too sus."

Why Not Use It?

River Toads hate fighting - would just flee

But if it was a Blood River Python? Insta-rage mode 😤

500 IQ Play: Saves his trump card for real emergencies

🐸 TOAD PUSHING SPEEDRUN (DUAL BOAR STACK ACTIVATE)

The Strat:

Tidal Wave Assist 🌊 (hydro homie came through)

Dual Boar Gu (🐗+🐗 = unstoppable chonk)

300m Push (sigma male rizz)

Toad Wakes Up:

"JIANGAAAANG!" (earrape warning 🔊)

Locks eyes with Fang Yuan

Sees dual boar aura + low-key SAR vibes

Nopes out immediately 🏃💨

Twitch Chat:

🌊 "HydroHomies: TOAD SAW THE GAINS AND LEFT"

💀 "SkillIssue: CHI SHAN COULD NEVER"

RNG COMES IN CLUTCH

Free Loot Dropped:

Hundred Year Bitter Shells 🐚 (finally!)

4 intact, 2 broken (still a W)

Bitter Wine Unlocked (Four Flavors Liquor Worm incoming)

🏆 AFTERMATH (CLAN COPING)

Clan Leader Bo:

"Good good good!" (three-peat)

Promotes Fang Yuan to team leader + 500 primeval stones

Internal Affairs Elder: (who just slandered him)

🤡 Clown arc (visible regret)

Tavern NPCs: (who talked shit earlier)

Get executed by panic-stricken Gu Masters

"Fang Yuan is our hero!" (forced glazing)

Moral of the day: If you are a NPC NEVER test the sigma.

Bitter wine acquired (Four Flavors Liquor Worm incoming)

Toad mechanics exploited (500 years of rizz)