Fang Yuan's Neko Maid Cafe (Part One)

The candles were dead, the light was on life support. The crescent moon dipped out, and a new day spawned, giving off that "new patch just dropped" vibe.

Fang Yuan opened his eyes, staring at the Liquor worm like it was a glitched NFT. Its white body had a slight green tint, the result of his all-nighter grind. But the green was like, 0.01% of its body, giving off major "my progress bar is buffering" energy.

Fang Yuan's face was serious, like he was facing a pay-to-win boss with infinite HP. The worm's willpower was straight-up OP, beyond any Rank 1 expectations, giving off that "this is a certified hood classic" vibe.

"This was probably Flower Wine Monk's main weapon, his OG starter Pokemon. He was Rank 5, so this worm was a legend. It survived years of being starved, so it got nerfed to a starter pack, but its willpower is still built different, no cap."

Fang Yuan unlocked the lore.

The Liquor worm was Flower Wine Monk's ride-or-die Gu, his main character energy. After he died, his strong will was still loaded into the worm's hard drive. Rizzing it meant fighting Flower Wine Monk's ghost data, like battling a streamer's alt account.

This was a whole different level of grind, like trying to speedrun a Dark Souls boss with a broken controller.

Human willpower is stronger than a basic Gu, like a level 1 noob. Facing death, humans unlock that hidden potential, like a secret cheat code. Flower Wine Monk, a chaotic evil main, was even more built different, giving off "final boss" energy.

"Rizzing this worm in a month? That's a speedrun impossible glitch, unless a high-level player uses a Rank 2 or 3 aura debuff to suppress its will, like a mod menu. With that kind of carry, I could actually clutch this, fr fr." Fang Yuan sighed, giving off major "I need a squad" vibes.

With his Rank 1 aura, it was not possible to easily rizz up this Gu worm which had once been at Rank 5. 

His parents were MIA, his aunt and uncle were lowkey throwing shade, and he had zero sponsors. Where was he supposed to find a carry?

If he had A-tier stats, maybe he'd have a chance. But he was C-tier, straight mid. Nobody in the clan was rooting for him, so who'd waste their energy on a side quest?

Most importantly, he couldn't leak the Liquor worm.

There were zero Liquor worms in Gooner Yue Village. He couldn't drop the lore without raising red flags. If he revealed it, the clan might connect the dots to Flower Wine Monk, and that's a whole plot twist he didn't need.

"Seventeen stones? That's a lowball offer. I need at least thirty, fr! This is a whole grind, but I'm rizzing this worm, no matter what." Fang Yuan's willpower was diamond-tier, he was locked in.

A vital Gu was a game-changer, it shaped your entire build. The Liquor worm wasn't the meta pick, but it was better than the Moonlight starter pack, and it was his best option in this situation.

Rumble rumble

Fang Yuan's stomach was hitting him with that "low battery" warning. An all-nighter of Gu-grinding had left him hangry.

Actually, now that he needed a few more skibidi stones, this might be the right time to put his business plan into action. 

His eyes flashed. Anything for benefits! Time to get on that sigma grindset hustle!

Scene transmission!

Fang Zheng was looking for his elder brother, and heard that he was camping out in the inn.

He froze, however, upon seeing that the sign above the inn had changed. "Gooner Yue Fang Yuan's Neko Maid Cafe Opens Today... what is this about?"

Fang Zheng walked in, to see a new sign near the entryway: 'Lady Zi Wei's panty flash caught on audio-visual Gu! Heavenly Court's strong foundation is shook, FR! Video streaming available for 2 skibidi stones an hour!'

Fang Zheng couldn't get what that was supposed to be about, but then the did a double-take upon seeing his brother greeting him.

"Nyan! Nyan!" Fang Yuan said, dressed up in a maid outfit and wearing fake cat ears on top of his head. He also was waring two big cat mittens on his hands, and a fake tail (Fang Zheng hoped it was fake) was poking out from behind his skirt. His voice was dialed up a pitch, as if trying to be kawaii AF. "Does master want to try the new Beesechurger Menu deal? We're offering the first one hundred chapters of 'Primordial Dual Cultivator Dragon With System' with every meal!"

Fang Zheng couldn't handle it and spat out a mouthful of blood at the sight of his brother dressed like this, not to mention trying to act like a cutesy maid. 

"Bro, why you still at the inn? You ghosted home last night, what's good?" Fang Zheng was straight up asking, like he was calling him out. "And why are you dressed up like that?"

Fang Yuan snapped out of character, abandoning his fursona. "I need more skibidi stones, and what better way than starting out a business like this?" 

"Business!? You're dressed up as a cat girl!"

"Indeed," Fang Yuan said. "Listen, bro, maybe if you got rid of that yee yee ass haircut, Shen Cui might actually give you the time of day. But enough about that, why you even wasting your time on femoids when you need to get on that sigma male grindset ASAP and start grinding?"

"Sigma male? You're literally dressed up as a woman!" Fang Zheng said. 

"What male and female? Listen bro, there are only two genders in this world," Fang Yuan said. "Those who have eternal life, and those who don't. And I plan on transitioning ASAP, you hear?"

"Still, don't you feel ashamed like this?"

"Ashamed? In all of the nine heavens and five regions, I alone am the shameless one," Fang Yuan proclaimed. "Now, if you're not a customer, scram! This is our opening day, and I want to make sure it all goes right." He had spent quite some time convincing the innkeeper that this was a good idea, and profits were already raking in. He didn't need his lil' bro hanging around and Fanum Taxing this business.

"Yo, bro, you straight-up tryin' to throw me out? Rude." Fang Zheng said, his voice giving off major "I'm calling you out" energy. "Like, what did you do to Shen Cui? She came out your room yesterday sobbing, like a heroine in a Korean soap opera. I tried to comfort her, and she just went full-on waterworks, like a broken faucet."