Memories linger

The moment Ji Haoyu stepped back, the silence in the room thickened, heavy with something unspoken. A'Xian exhaled slowly, steadying himself, but his pulse was still erratic, his breath not quite even.

Ji Haoyu's golden eyes flickered with a quiet provocation before he turned away, pouring himself another cup of wine as if the kiss hadn't happened, as if he hadn't just stolen the last sliver of control A'Xian had left.

A'Xian clenched his fists behind him, his bound hands itching to wipe the lingering heat off his lips. But he didn't. He refused to give Ji Haoyu that satisfaction. Instead, he straightened his shoulders, forcing his usual sharpness back into his voice.

"Enjoying yourself?" His words dripped with mockery. "That's what this is to you, isn't it? A game?"

Ji Haoyu didn't even look up. "If it were a game, you'd be losing."

Ji Haoyu set his cup down with a soft clink, tilting his head slightly, "And yet, you're still here."

A'Xian's fingers curled into his palms.

Bastard.

Ji Haoyu took his time, walking past him toward the lantern stand. With a flick of his fingers, the warm glow dimmed, casting the room in deep shadows.

"Enough arguing. It's late."

A'Xian stared at him, disbelieving. "You expect me to sleep?"

"You expect me to care?" Ji Haoyu shot back smoothly. "You're staying here, so either get comfortable or stand there all night. It's your choice."

A'Xian clicked his tongue. There was no point in fighting a battle he couldn't win.

He walked toward the bed, lowering himself to the edge as far from Ji Haoyu as possible.

The Crown Prince made no move to stop him, simply watching with thinly veiled amusement.

The night stretched on in uneasy silence.

This world… I've been here twice.

Ancient China, different lives at different times.

A'Xian gazed at the drawn darkness, the quiet glow of the moon spilling through the wooden lattice window. It painted silver streaks across the polished floor, washing over him in an ethereal glow.

He sat in the silence, legs folded, arms resting over his knees, bathed in that fleeting tranquility. The warmth of the blanket lingered on his shoulders, but it was distant just like everything else.

His mind wandered.

That one time when he was in the body of an emperor himself, overseeing the treaty of Great kingdom of Beiyan, he was poisoned to death by his own son. And another time, when he was in the role of a prince struggling to escape his father's conspiracies.

I've never heard of Ji Haoyu before..

In all the lives he had passed through, in all the histories he had touched, everyone was an unfamiliar presence.

A'Xian exhaled, shutting his eyes briefly.

Ji Haoyu.

There was something unnervingly different about him. The kind that stirred from a past so distant, it might as well have belonged to another lifetime.

He pressed his fingers to his lips, exhaling a soft chuckle, one that held no humor, only disbelief.

What the hell am I doing?

It had been so long. So long since someone had touched him with intent, since warmth had pressed against him in something other than battle, other than necessity. He could barely remember the last time he had given in to something just because he wanted to.

Or was it that he had never allowed himself to want?

His thoughts drifted further, further… until they landed on a memory he had long buried.

A'Xian's brows furrowed slightly, fingers curling over his knee. He couldn't remember exactly. Not clearly. Just shadows and sensations of soft touches, stolen moments, a voice whispering his name like it meant something.

Back then, he had trusted. He had loved.

But it had cost him everything.

A'Xian exhaled slowly, pushing the thought aside before it could sink its claws too deep. It didn't matter. The past never did. The only thing that mattered was now and right now, Ji Haoyu was a complication he didn't need.

He scoffed to himself, letting his hand fall from his lips.

It was just a kiss.

Just my body overreacting after years of nothing.

It didn't mean anything. It couldn't.

A'Xian turned his head slightly, glancing at the bed where Ji Haoyu rested. The prince's breathing was slow and steady, almost peaceful.

He tore his gaze away. His pulse still loud in his ears.

It's been too long. That's all it is.

A'Xian had no idea when he drifted off.

He had been sitting there, arms over his knees, lost in thought. The moon had been high, the silence of the room thick. But at some point, exhaustion must have caught up to him.

But now, there was warmth against him. A firm arm wrapped securely around his waist, pressing him into something solid and steady. His mind was still foggy from sleep, but his senses were waking fast, too fast. The scent of sandalwood and something richer filled his nose.

His eyes snapped open.

Ji Haoyu.

A'Xian stiffened instantly, breath catching as he realized exactly where he was.

What the—?!

A warm, heavy blanket covered both of them, pulled around his shoulders. And beneath it, his body had betrayed him, unconsciously seeking warmth in sleep because he wasn't just lying next to Ji Haoyu. He was curled into him.

F_ck.

Nestled against his broad chest, his face dangerously close to the smooth column of the prince's neck, their legs nearly tangled beneath the blanket. His hand was resting against Ji Haoyu's torso, fingers curled slightly over the fabric of his inner robe, as if..

As if he had done this willingly.

A'Xian's eyes widened. He sucked in a sharp breath and immediately jerked, hands shoving against Ji Haoyu's chest in a desperate attempt to push away.

But the arm tightened around him, holding him in place. Ji Haoyu was already awake.

"Going somewhere?" Ji Haoyu's voice was husky from sleep.

A'Xian gritted his teeth, struggling against the hold. "Let go."

Ji Haoyu didn't. Instead, his grip tightened just slightly, as if indulging himself he tilted his head, his lips brushing against the shell of A'Xian's ear.

"You were sleeping so soundly," he murmured. "Should I take that as a sign that you like being in my arms?"

A'Xian's face heated instantly, a furious scowl twisting his lips. "Shut up."

Ji Haoyu chuckled. "But you fit so well here," he mused, shifting slightly beneath him. The motion was slow, deliberate, their bodies pressing closer.

"Let. Go." His voice was lower now, threatening.

"What if I don't?"

A'Xian barely had a second to react before warm fingers tilted his chin up and Ji Haoyu's lips were on his.

This time, it wasn't a stolen kiss in the heat of an argument. This was deeper and slower.

A'Xian's body tensed instinctively, his mind screaming at him to shove Ji Haoyu away. To resist. To not fall for this trap. But his body—

It wasn't listening!

A soft, shuddering breath escaped him, and he felt himself giving in. His fingers, instead of pushing, clutched at the fabric of Ji Haoyu's robe. His lips, instead of refusing, parted just slightly.

And Ji Haoyu took full advantage.

His hand slid from A'Xian's waist, traveling up the curve of his back, drawing him impossibly closer. His lips moved with practiced ease, coaxing, teasing, until A'Xian's mind was a blurred from heat and sensation.

This wasn't supposed to happen.

But...It's been too long. That's all it is.

That was the lie he clung to when he finally broke away, his heart racing like anything.

Even as Ji Haoyu smirked down at him, golden eyes gleaming with satisfaction.