As indicated by the prefix "Happy," some characters prefer not to mention their full titles.
Especially Happy Iris. Even in the webtoon, she only introduced herself as "Iris."
Whenever someone called her "Happy Iris," she always reacted with displeasure.
At first, it was a comedic element—how even the characters who transform are embarrassed by their names—and a satire on those in power who give excessively tacky names and pride themselves on it.
However, as the story progressed, Iris's overly serious reactions ended up annoying the audience whenever it happened.
"Happy Iris!"
So, I deliberately called her that.
Of course, my helmet has a voice modulation system.
No matter if the person inside is male, female, or of any other gender, the resulting voice is a supremely annoying "monster voice."
Well, it's better than just giggling like in other tokusatsu shows, and it keeps my identity safe, so I can't complain too much.
"Happy! Iris!"
Twitch.
When I emphasized the word "Happy" twice, one of Iris's eyebrows twitched.
"Don't be like that! It's better than Cherry Blossom, isn't it?"
And here's Iris's second weak point.
She absolutely hates being compared to Blossom.
This is just one of those classic rival clichés.
Think of it as the relationship between a cheerful genius and a serious hard worker.
Not to say Blossom isn't hardworking.
Perhaps what irritates Iris is precisely that.
Blossom always smiles kindly, and anyone who gets mad at her ends up looking like the bad guy.
Not to mention, Blossom never gives a reason to be angry in the first place, which makes it all the more annoying.
To make things worse, Iris genuinely feels a sense of camaraderie with her, which likely makes her emotions even more complicated.
"…Fine. I've changed my mind."
Beep-beep-beep-beep!
Iris's voice was half-drowned out by the alarm blaring from my helmet.
98 percent.
Good.
It's working.
"I'll make sure to kill you."
Thud.
Iris soared back into the air.
Despite her overwhelming combat power, she fully understands her enemies' strengths and avoids them.
She doesn't even give them a chance to strike.
The emotions harbored by magical girls are almost certainly positive ones—hope born from standing back up after despair, fighting and defeating evil, and that sense of endless optimism.
That feeling is what allows them to wield hope.
The "circuit" that lets them return to the emotions they felt before they fully understood the world is referred to in the story as the "Hope Circuit."
…And yes, if you've ever heard the internet slang "happiness circuit," that's where it came from.
Though the Hope Circuit doesn't actually create hope, it converts an individual's hope into magic.
It's also one of the main reasons the Galactic Federation has its eyes on Earth.
On the other hand, what I possess is—
Beep-beep-beep-beep!
As Iris distanced herself and aimed a weapon at me, an ear-splitting sound echoed in my ears.
No chance of winning.
No hope at all.
Even if my circuit reached 100 percent, the result wouldn't change.
It would hurt.
It would definitely hurt.
If I'm unlucky, I'll break more than two bones; if I'm lucky, just one.
I might manage to cover the medical costs, but the pain is inevitable—
Yeah.
What I'm feeling now is the polar opposite of hope.
It's despair.
My circuit runs on the despair people feel.
Unlike hope, which shines brightly, despair isn't particularly efficient on its own.
But unlike hope, which has a limited peak, despair knows no bottom.
And with the right circumstances, almost every human on Earth can generate the "despair" needed to power a circuit.
Though this is information only someone like me, who knows the webtoon's lore, would be aware of.
"Why not leave some last words?" Iris said.
"I'll make sure to remember the dying words of someone who dared provoke me."
Beep-beep-beep-beep!
100 percent.
The vibration in my left wrist felt dangerously intense.
This mass-produced model, developed for corporate production, would likely break if I pushed it much further.
Before that happens.
Yes.
I can't win.
I can't win, but…
This is infuriating!
How many times has this happened already?
I poured my frustration into pointing a finger at Iris.
"Huh?"
Iris blinked at my audacious gesture.
Looking at her reaction, I grinned and shouted,
"Happy Iris! Panties! Purple!"
"Excuse me!? Don't be ridiculous! Today, they're definitely black—"
Iris's voice trailed off, her mouth snapping shut.
This was a censored scene in the webtoon after it went mainstream, but even if the magical girls wear proper shorts in a major series, their personalities remain unchanged.
Iris is always composed and intelligent, but sometimes she's hilariously absent-minded!
She has a clumsy streak!
While her brain short-circuited for a moment, I leaped forward.
Though my suit may look like mere spandex, it's firmly connected to the circuit on my wrist and supports my physical strength.
I might not have the power to leave craters with each step like "Happy Red Rose," but—
Thud!
At least I had the strength to jump high enough to reach Iris.
And my blade was still intact in my left hand!
As Iris's face grew closer, illuminated by the blue moonlight, her coldly beautiful features became vividly clear.
Still flustered.
Was she shocked because I wasn't like the other combatants who immediately ran at the sight of her?
I can do this.
I can reach her.
This attack won't win the battle, but at the very least, it'll land a solid blow…!
Beep-beep-beep-beep!
Beep-beep-beep!
Beeeeeeep—
Huh?
The percentage displayed on my helmet began dropping rapidly.
What had been 99 percent plummeted to 80 percent in an instant, then fell further into the 70s.
Ah, come on!
Did I really think I had even a slim chance of landing a hit? Was it because I had allowed myself a sliver of hope—
"Alright, I'll commend your courage for that."
Ah.
I'm screwed.
While I had managed to fluster Iris, I ended up getting flustered myself.
Though I quickly regained my composure, Iris—now calm but still furious—was staring directly at me.
At a distance so close, you could almost call it "point-blank."
I hastily twisted my body and swung my blade, but—
Whoosh.
The aura surrounding Iris's body completely nullified the attack, and my blade dissolved into nothingness.
And then—
"Well then, Merry Christmas."
Iris smiled brightly and pulled the trigger of the weapon aimed at me.
The next moment, everything in front of me turned white.
When I came to—where was I?
It looked like the rooftop of some building.
Even though Iris is still a high school student, she's absurdly intelligent.
She's already researching the principles behind the Galactic Federation's warp points.
Of course, this is a closely guarded secret.
The Galactic Federation allows Iris to continue her research because they're observing the potential of the Hope Circuit's energy and planning to scout her once her research is complete.
Who would willingly join an organization that restricts their freedom to pursue what they love?
Iris's "attack" was an application of that very research.
Killing an opponent is illegal, but if you want to neutralize them completely in a single move, the solution is simple—just send them far enough away that they can't return anytime soon.
As I tried to stand up, I groaned, clutching my side.
Did it crack? Or break? Well, if it's just ribs, that's manageable.
At least I can still walk.
If my legs had been broken and there wasn't a 24-hour free clinic run by a Galactic Federation civic group nearby, even getting there would've been a nightmare.
I fumbled for my helmet, removed it, and tossed it aside.
Thankfully, its durability was insane—I couldn't break it even if I tried.
Apparently, it's sold as motorcycle gear with a slightly sleeker design, marketed as being resistant to magical girl attacks.
The durability speaks for itself.
Maybe Iris went easy on me in her own way.
After sitting around for a while, I staggered to my feet and walked to the rooftop railing.
Sigh.
Even though it's winter, wearing that stifling helmet for so long made the cool air feel incredibly refreshing once I took it off.
Refreshing, but—
Beep-beep-beep.
"…What good is it if it only goes off after the fight's over?"
Holding my aching side, I looked down at the circuit on my wrist.
My despair level was at 80 percent.
Where even was this place?
With no smartphone or credit card, how was I supposed to get home?
…If I go back, the director will definitely scold me again.
Not a bad person, but they always assume I'm out late fooling around.
And if they see I'm injured, they'll demand to know where I got into a fight this time.
I mean, they're not wrong.
"Heh."
Standing there in a dusty suit, clueless about my location, I probably looked like a total idiot.
Maybe I should quit.
Honestly, I'm so done with this.
I know I can't win, but even so—
[You incompetent fools!]
While staring blankly down from the rooftop, a loud voice came from the circuit on my wrist.
[What are you doing dropping out before even stepping onto the stage? Do you lot not care about getting paid!?]
Well, in my case, it's not about the money.
Listening to the leader's yelling over the comms, I unstrapped the circuit from my wrist and tossed it aside.
The device, which had been running on my despair energy, powered down and went quiet.
"I wonder if the others ended up somewhere decent."
Musing about the others for no reason, I chuckled to myself, turned around, and headed back.
I cradled my throbbing side with one hand and threw the circuit into the helmet before picking it up.
Time to go home.
At least I'm still in Seoul, so I can probably figure something out.
Maybe I'll stop by a clinic if I find one on the way.
Well, there are times when despair energy comes in handy.
When I put the circuit and helmet back on, it became easier to sprint using their energy.
Still, running the equivalent of seven subway stations wasn't exactly an enjoyable experience.
On top of that, the minion uniforms from the company were way too conspicuous.
Just running around like that was probably enough to make the internet buzz with articles or posts by tomorrow.
I'd get scolded again.
Thankfully, at least I wasn't in danger of being fired.
At first, I had no idea where I was, but after a bit of walking, I came across a familiar area and managed to find the company building.
At the very least, they let us change clothes inside the Noir Corporation building.
Otherwise, no one would want to sign up as a combatant.
Of course, even when we did change there, the deployment zones were often far away.
The building's lower floors housed a shopping mall, and as expected of an "evil" corporation, there were plenty of people working late into the night.
When I changed into casual clothes and headed down to the first floor, no one would have guessed I was a combatant.
Combatants coming and going wasn't rare, but… well, you'd expect there to be more than just a handful in this building.
When I checked the time on my phone as I descended to the first floor, it was already 10 p.m.
By the time I got back, it would be close to 11.
I still hadn't called the orphanage.
And there were seven missed calls on my phone.
… Looks like listening to music and relaxing tonight is out of the question.
Sure enough, when I got back, the caretaker was waiting for me.
"…Where were you, coming back at this hour?"
They didn't yell.
The kids were already asleep, and besides, no one here ever yelled or scolded the children harshly.
Maybe it's because of legal issues or something—I'm not entirely sure.
"Not planning to tell me this time either?"
"Ji-eun, if you're going through something difficult—"
"I'm not."
To be honest, I just wanted to collapse into bed and sleep.
At this orphanage, aside from the 10 p.m. curfew, high schoolers had quite a bit of freedom.
On weekends, they didn't even mind if you stayed up all night.
But someone like me, who regularly came back past 11, was pretty much treated as a "problem child."
"… Fine."
The caretaker spoke, sounding as though they weren't giving up entirely but knew dragging out the conversation wouldn't get us anywhere.
"Go wash up and get some rest. Don't wake the kids."
"Sorry."
Hearing my apology, the caretaker gave a faint smile and nodded.
At least I never came back the next day.
I always made sure to get my injuries treated before returning.
Working for an interstellar corporation came in handy that way.
Of course, getting hurt in the first place was also because of that corporation.
With a rustling sound, I carried the paper bag holding a music CD to my room.
"Oh, you're back?"
My roommate, who was lounging on a blanket spread across the floor, raised their head slightly and looked at me.
Not a character from the original story.
If they were a magical girl, they'd have come back late like me today.
"What happened? Did you get caught up in a magical girl fight? It just so happens there was something near Gwanghwamun."
"You saw the news?"
"Of course. Just now."
Ji-hye waved her smartphone at me.
There was an article on the screen:
[Blossom Shines Again Today!]
Wow, a headline like that would definitely make Iris's blood boil.
I let out a long sigh and set down my bag.
"Let's see, what CD did you buy?"
"Didn't you say streaming is enough?"
"Come on, that's just a figure of speech.
Besides, I'm curious what you picked. Oh!"
Ji-hye smiled broadly as she pulled out the CD.
"This is from that animated movie we watched at the theater!"
"Yeah."
For reference, we went to that movie after donating blood to get free tickets for our birthdays earlier this year.
"Are we going to listen to it?"
She glanced expectantly at the audio equipment piled on my desk—a large speaker system and player.
In a previous life, my dad had something similar.
He called it a "turntable," though I doubt that's the proper name.
Later, I found out it's short for "electric gramophone."
But CDs don't go into a gramophone, obviously.
"The kids are asleep."
"Oh, right."
Looking slightly disappointed, Ji-hye carefully placed the CD on my desk.
"Ahem."
Suddenly, she cleared her throat and shifted her tone.
"So?"
"So, what?"
When I tilted my head, Ji-hye grinned.
"What kind of guy is your boyfriend?"
Why does everyone around me keep asking that?
"It's Christmas, isn't it? No way you were just out buying a CD this late. You must've met someone."
"I could've met a friend."
"You don't have friends."
I rolled my eyes dramatically.
"I don't have friends, but I have a boyfriend?"
"Exactly! They're totally separate things."
"Ugh."
Deciding it wasn't worth responding, I flopped onto the blanket Ji-hye had spread out.
"Aw, come on, tell me! Who is it?"
"There isn't one."
"Really? Are you sure?"
"There isn't."
I closed my eyes, too exhausted to continue.
I was utterly drained.
Ji-hye seemed ready to keep probing but must've noticed how genuinely tired I looked.
"Fine, but you owe me the story tomorrow."
She really doesn't give up, does she?
Still, it's better than being like me, giving up on everything. At least she's what you'd call a proper high schooler—unlike me.
After muttering a few more complaints to herself, Ji-hye lay down in her spot.
She fell asleep before me, her breathing evening out into soft, regular rhythms.
Not long after, I drifted off as well.
"Ji-eun, Ji-eun!"
As soon as I got to school in the morning, Blossom came up to me, chattering noisily.
"What?"
I replied curtly without even looking at her, busy pulling my textbook out of my bag. Blossom, as usual, wasn't deterred in the slightest.
Suddenly, she shoved something right in front of me as I rummaged through my bag.
"Sorry. I was supposed to give this to you two days ago."
I blinked at the neatly wrapped gift in front of me.
Judging by its size, it looked like a CD.
"You know, when we went to the bookstore last time, it seemed like you were staring at it for a while."
"…Oh."
I think I know what it is.
It must be that jazz CD I was staring at because of the striking cover. Not that I'm well-versed in jazz, so I couldn't tell you whose album it was.
"…I didn't get you anything, though."
"It's fine! Gifts are something you give because you want to, right?"
…If she puts it that way, it sounds less like reassurance and more like rubbing it in.
Still, knowing Blossom, she probably didn't mean it like that.
"Thanks."
I accepted it.
It's not like I could reject a gift from a childhood friend.
And it's definitely not because it's an album I've really been wanting to listen to or anything.
Blossom grinned at me, looking utterly pleased with herself.
Seriously, she's too kind for her own good.
I wonder what she'll think if she ever finds out my real identity.
…Not that I have any intention of letting her find out.
After stashing the wrapped CD deep in my bag, I finally retrieved the textbook I'd been looking for and placed it on my desk.