Chapter 78

After everything had calmed down and Luz had received an extended hug from her Mom, they went back to the institute(except for Masha, who was taken to their sister's apartment) where they turned in for the night. The next morning, Luz inquired about whether or not they could use the medical scanner again. Partly because, well... Her new Titan form came with some obvious physical differences and even if she could rvent the outside she didn't know if she changed back on the inside. Additionally, Amity's transformation into a Valkyrie could potentially have had similar consequences as Asgardians while humanlike are a distinct species... And also Luz wanted to know if her Apotheosis would have cured her lactose intolerance.

They were allowed the use of the machine and learned three major things: That there had been a lot of internal changes to Luz's body, but they were mostly built on what was already there, that Amity could now safely eat most human foods, and that Luz's fear of milk was still rational.

Also, the bit of trivia that Asgardians could live for three minutes without a heart. ("We will not be testing that," Amity had said a little too calmly immediately upon being told.)

After that came breakfast and then saying goodbye to their new friends with affirmations about staying in touch, which reminded Luz to text Mabel that she was okay since the Pines were sent home before she recovered. Then other than a detour to pick up Masha Magik took them back to Gravesfield.

"I'll see you Saturday," Magic said to Luz before leaving and then that was it. Luz was home... Or at least, one of her homes. She... She knew it was coming, but that didn't make it any easier.

You'd think that knowing that Belos was dead and gone would make it easier but... Once Luz was safe in the comfort of her own home, and with nothing else to distract her, her mind turned to... Well, the events of the previous night, and letting them sink in... The close calls, almost dying. Amity almost dying... Depression sucked. Why couldn't this be like in a cartoon where all you need is a heart-filled pep talk and to beat the bad guy? She tried not to... She wasn't even blaming herself this time, she just... As the day went on found her mood souring and her motivation draining. She skipped lunch and had to force herself to eat dinner and...

Sleep didn't come easily that night. As she lay in her bunk, noting that Amity, Vee, and Willow had all fallen asleep hours ago... She found herself pondering just... She knew her friends supported her. She knew she could talk to them, especially Amity who had made it clear that Luz could come to her so... Why wasn't she? Luz sat up and checked the time... 2:30 AM. Her roommates were all asleep and reaching out with her ESP she could tell that the boys and her Mo were all in bed too... Mom probably wouldn't mind being woken up but she had to go back to work in the morning, so that was out...

She got out of bed and left the room. After a glass of water failed to help her clear her head... Well... She needed to talk with someone and...

She went back to her room and, very quietly so as not to wake the others, grabbed her spare house key. The palismen were sleeping in a pile on the couch but as Luz entered the living room Stringbean wiggled out and floated up her with a yawn and an inquisitive hiss.

"Hey Beany," Luz whispered. "Um, I'm heading out to... To see someone. Wanna come with?"

"Always," was the rattled response as her palisman settled atop her head. Luz left the house, locking up behind her, and then on her staff flew over the town. The view of Gravesfield from above at night was... Not as magical as the same of Bonsborrogh but still pretty cool and, pretty soon she and Stringbean had made their way to Gravesfield cemetary. Not the old flooded boneyard, but the modern one.

Luz landed just inside the gate and made her way the rest of the way on foot, as that was what felt right. Luckily, this wasn't a movie so no groundskeeper was patrolling the grounds with a flashlight, no rowdy teenagers choosing the worst possible place to make out, no college sorority doing initiation dares involving staying on the grave of a criminal overnight, and no ghosts. Luz and Stringbean were alone.

Luz knew the path by heart. It was near the back, so to speak. A lot of old graves back there. They hadn't... Well, getting a grave on short notice meant there weren't that many good options, so grabbing an unsold plot from the older part was the best that could be done on short notice. However, as Luz approached she realized that... Some of these graves didn't look all that well-maintained. That... Wasn't right. She didn't know these people, they could have been good or bad but... If someone cared about them enough to give them a proper barrel then they were cared for enough that they should have maintained graves.

A bit of magic fixed that up. Glyphs traced in light floating in the air formed a combo that conjured a gentle spout of water that rinsed dirt and dust, sometimes years worth, from about a dozen stones while a small plant glyph produced a tasteful bouquet of daisies for each grave. It was ten minutes of work, not exactly a major commitment, but... Anyway, she finished that and then finally got to the grave she'd come to visit.

This headstone was clean. Of course, it was. She and her Mom were out here at least once a year. More plant glyphs decorated the grave with the same sorts of wildflowers he used to pick for her and Mamá and then Luz sat at the foot of the grave.

"Hola Papi," Luz greeted. "It's been a while... Sorry, I missed the anniversary... I mean, I know we did the thing with the video call but that's not the same. I um... I'm a witch now. A strong one, one... Everyone tells me how proud they are of the work I've put into it but the truth is I wouldn't have gotten anywhere near this strong if it wasn't for my friends, and a couple of gifts..." The Titan's gift of life, and Belos's palismen victims gifting knowledge to try and keep her and Hunter safe. "And... I have friends now, too. Gus and Willow are amazing and Amity... Ella es mi alma gemela, mi único amor verdadero. The family's getting bigger, too. I've got a mentor who's like a second mom, who is my second mom back in the Isles, and a new sister, and a little brother... maybe a big brother, too, we'll have to see how things go with Hunter. Then there's Masha, Vee's theyfriend, they're cool. Not to mention the friends I've made over the weekend." Luz sighed. "I wish you could have gotten a chance to meet everyone."

Luz took a moment to collect her thoughts before she continued. "I... I'm having a hard time of things lately. And not the normal way. Um, I don't want to into detail but I've been under a lot of stress lately all because of some jerk, and... I've been diagnosed with depression. Not the kind where there's something wrong in my brain, I'm not on happy pills but... There's something wrong going on up there. Like part of my mind thinks I deserve to be unhappy and it's making me think of bad thoughts and trying to make sure I'm not happy or... And I know this isn't right, that I'm not to blame for the things it's blaming me for, and that I deserve to be happy but... It's hard and... This past day was a bad day. I couldn't even work up the nerve to tell my friends that I..." Luz swallowed. "But, you don't have to worry about me, alright Papi? I'm gonna be fine. I'm in a support group for people who have had experiences like mine and the other girls are nice, and I'm gonna start therapy soon, and... I've got things I can do to help manage it while we work out the problem in therapy, I just need to motivate myself to do it. I promise, on... Well on here, that I'm gonna be okay. Starting tomorrow, I'm gonna do my best not to let myself feel bad for no reason and get this problem taken care of."

Luz got up, and then at a mental impression from her partner held out her staff. Stringbean animated and flew up to the headstone. "Hello, Mr. Luz's Papi, I'm Stringbean," the snakeshifter hissed. "I love my witch Luz very much and I promise I'm gonna take good care of her so you don't have to worry."

After Stringbean said her piece he turned back into a staff. "Thanks for listening," Luz said to her father's grave and then she turned to go back home and maybe finally get some sleep. As she walked away for only the briefest of moments she could have sworn she felt a little warm, like someone had given her a quick hug.