326

"This is maddening, don't you agree? It is exhausting. I am tired of it all..."

"I understand. I have seen it all as well, Your Majesty."

"I don't know what I would have done without you. If you weren't here to keep me sane..."

"I am always learning from you, Your Majesty. It is a joy and an honor to be of any assistance to you for even a moment," Inés answered in a sincere tone, holding back her inner thoughts. I have always learned from you just how little I wish for your pathetic life.

Anyone could flatter her, but not everyone could be a family member who had witnessed the shameful, private situation. The same words of flattery from a family member would sound like comforting sincerity.

Empress Cayetana was part of Inés's family no matter how many lives she lived. The difference in that despicable reality this time around was that she was very useful.

"No matter where I turn, you are the only one who understands how weary I am. No one else. How did it come to this?"

Marchioness Yargavá had aroused some slight suspicion in Empress Cayetana, and, having lost her composure around the loyal friends she had, the empress had begun to insult and criticize them left and right. Every conflict was triggered by the smallest spark. Without leaving a single trace, Inés had planted such a spark under every one of them, had steadily pushed women she could control into the empress's inner circle, and taken in the women who had lost all respect for Cayetana.

In other words, Inés knew precisely how it had "come to this." Every other night, the empress would visit the dungeon where her lover was locked away, and she would be flabbergasted by her obviously unwell children during the day, terrified by Dolores's unimaginable tantrums. She would also worry about her dying brother and constantly argue with the emperor. Inés had made sure that whenever Empress Cayetana searched for someone to lean on, she was the only person available.

"I cannot be the only one at your side when everyone is vying to be there for you, Your Majesty. You have simply placed much more trust in me than I deserve."

Dolores was throwing a tantrum over losing out on the marriage she had considered so humiliating. The fact that she realized the truth about her lowly identity at the same time was rather unfortunate, but this was where she belonged. She still hadn't arrived at her lowest point, in fact.

Dolores had yet to realize her position: She ought to have known that she could not dare to despise Cayetana, even if the whole world were against her.

But the empress wasting her charity and having no one to accept her love was quite the sight to behold. It was all happening at just the right time, as Inés intended. She felt satisfied watching it all unfold, as in her past life she had set the fire without being able to witness the result.

No man could have ever driven the noble Cayetana to such anguish. Even Admiral Calderon, who had commanded the sea, had not been able to control his daughter. Dolores would not be so devastated if she realized that she had achieved something even the emperor had never managed.

Inés put a gentle arm around her shoulder as Empress Cayetana wept and leaned against her.

"Dolores will eventually realize how you feel, Your Majesty," she cooed. But she knew that Dolores was an incorrigible fool to ever realize this, and that the two would never go back to the affectionate mother and daughter they once were. Inés then added, "You also have your son, the crown prince."

"Oscar may be my son, but he will eventually become the emperor." The empress was making it sound that this meant he was not really her son. She straightened up, her expression stiffening. "I always kept that in mind as I treasured him all these years. At the mere age of ten, I found him more difficult to deal with than his father. The way he stared at me at times... Let us not speak of this now. I simply mean to say that Dolores was different. When she was a little girl, holding her in my arms made me feel like I was an ordinary woman. If I had not married into the imperial family and simply let my father find a match for me and had children that way... Perhaps I may have been able to live in peace."

Inés stroked her arm in wordless comfort.

"She would make me regret my decisions, even though my life lacks nothing and could not be any better. She made me feel that a simpler life may have been preferable... And because of that, at times, Dolores seemed more like my own child than Oscar."

"So that is why..."

"Yes... that is why I still feel sorry for that ungrateful girl."

Having someone so selfish admit that she actually felt sorry for not officially registering her husband's illegitimate child as part of the family was astounding.

It was, of course, common for someone unworthy of such love to receive it nonetheless. Even if that love was in the form of devotion from a woman like Cayetana. It was parental love-a love that was unconditional. People had such ridiculous and irrational tendencies sometimes. They were willing to sacrifice for the sake of their own child, but they could just as easily crush anyone else's child before their mother like a worm.

Inés recalled the pure joy that had crossed the empress's face whenever she insulted others. Her malice wasn't simply directed at Regina Merillo's starving child; she had vilified Inés before her own mother. Olga Valeztena had always told Inés that, since she was defective for being unable to bear a child, she needed to kneel down and obey the imperial family. Yet, even she must have suffered during those times. She had told Inés to kneel in the hopes that her humiliation wouldn't last too long. However, Empress Cayetana had kept Olga at her side, knowing how much it pained her to see her daughter suffer insults-and the empress relished those moments, the agony of emotions behind the other woman's stiff face.

"If only you had married Oscar... Having you closer would have brought me such comfort."

"It would have been an honor, but someone much more suitable is at His Highness's side now."

"Such empty words... You have given your soul to Cárcel anyway."

Alicia happened to be waiting by the empress's bedroom door, and her brow furrowed slightly when she caught sight of Inés steadying Empress Cayetana as they walked together.

Inés gave her a friendly nod and continued, "I cannot possibly take on the lifelong responsibilities that Your Majesty and Her Highness bear. I am not suited for unconditional devotion either."

"If you are not suited for the role, that Barca girl has no hope. There is no need to be humble."

"Who else could possibly suit His Highness better than her? He personally takes care of every detail concerning his wife with utmost affection. I hear that he does not leave her alone for even a moment now."

"As you can see, he has left her alone without issue."

Inés chuckled and praised the empress for being so sharp. "In any case, the position molds the person who holds it."

"Yes, but such a position can be molded by the person too."

Their quiet conversation trailed off now that they were within earshot.

Alicia greeted the empress, and Inés greeted Alicia with the utmost respect. Alicia then swooped in and took Inés's place next to the empress.

Though she was apparently determined to turn Inés into her husband's mistress, her eyes turned green with envy whenever she saw Inés with her mother-in-law who had no interest in her whatsoever. Alicia's hands were restless as they steadied the empress. Inés wondered whether the crown princess longed for the favor she had received in the past life she did not remember or whether she blindly admired the empress, the great shadow that had weighed her down since her childhood. At this rate, it was clear that even if Alicia achieved her ends, she would not be able to watch it happen without seething with jealousy one way or another.

Inés clicked her tongue as she imagined the sight of the poor lady-in-waiting that Alicia had pushed into her husband's arms herself but had ended up beating because she could not control her anger.

Luciano had managed to extract the black-haired woman after she had been thrown out of the palace, no longer deemed useful. Her face had been terribly bruised as if she had been struck by a heavy object, and her chest and backside had been lashed with a whip as "punishment," as though Alicia couldn't stand that her husband had touched them. Inés could tell right away that both Oscar and his wife considered this fake lady-in-waiting her substitute; Alicia very clearly wished to do the same to Inés in the end.

The fact that Alicia had now resorted to such a nasty drug without any care to hide her activities meant that she was now not only impatient but desperate. The lady-in-waiting who had been tossed aside had confirmed that the drug would not work on Alicia Valenza. While she had been at the palace, the crown prince had only taken his wife to bed twice, almost by accident, after copulating with the lady-in-waiting, and both times had occurred only through Alicia's intense enthusiasm. Her great passion rendered such a drug useless to her, and she was not the kind to show any kindness to those women who sold their bodies. The person she meant to force-feed the dirty drug to was none other than Inés Escalante for daring to reject her Oscar.

When, then? If she is that impatient, what is she waiting for? Inés thought to herself, smiling inwardly as though it did not concern her at all.

Nothing had changed. Alicia had always been full of malice, but she was a disgustingly pure fanatic who was not clever enough to hide it. That was why everything she did was ultimately flawed, and why she would never be able to achieve what she desired. She was so busy rushing ahead that she had no sense to look back and cover her tracks.

Inés watched Alicia awkwardly supporting the empress who staggered in place as though she were about to collapse and being pushed away at the door. Though her eyes had been fixed on her mother-in-law, desperate for approval, they now flashed with malice as they glanced over at Inés before crinkling into a smile as though she had just remembered a triumphant thought. She was most likely thinking of the drug she had gotten her hands on, or something else incredibly reliable.

Inés continued to curtsy elegantly until the door close before her face turned frosty and she quickly walked away.

Empress Cayetana was right at times. Positions and roles molded people, but as she had said, at times the opposite was true as well. And this particular position was perfectly molded for Alicia Barca and no one else. By the same logic, some positions ruined people, and some people ruined certain positions as well.

Alicia was bound to ruin her position eventually all on her own, but Inés thought it might be a good idea to help her along.