Protect
Keifer's POV
I couldn't bring myself to go home. I went to the basement where we used to hang out. I went straight to the Mini Bar and just grabbed some alcohol. I didn't even bother looking at the brand. I just gulped it down to relieve the weight of my mood. But alcohol has no use. Even if I drink all the alcohol here, it still won't change how I feel. Angelo is right. I have to push Jay-jay away from me but I have to feel numb in order to do that. I might be the ï¬rst to give up when I see him struggling. But I really can't. I'll give up my life. If I do that, I'll die. "Kuya..." Someone called. I turn around to check. It was Keigan walking slowly in the darkness. "It's night... You should go to sleep." I said in a calm voice. "I've slept too much. I'll probably come back to the room later ." He said and forced a smile. "...Do you have a problem? Why are you still up and drinking?" The way Keigan speaks makes me confused. He's too far away from the Keigan I spoke this morning. He sounds normal. "Same things of course." I answered. There are times when I tell him a problem. I don't want him to feel that I'm drifting away from him or from Keiren and them. So I can't tell him, I say. But there are times that I have to shut my mouth. I go over to him and ask him to sit on the floor. We lean back on the back of the couch to make ourselves more comfortable. When we're in this position, it's just like we're normal siblings. "How is your day?" I asked him. I haven't said hello in a while. Honey was right about what she told me this morning. "I sleep for a whole day." He answered and shortly laughed. "...How about you?" I shook my head. "Not good." "Why?" "Things are being fvcked up." "Do you feel pressured? You don't have to rush. You still have a month to think about it." "That's not what's bothering me." I look down and shake the bottle of alcohol in my hand. "Is it about her?" Keigan's voice suddenly sounds disappointed. I know he doesn't like Jay-jay. For him, she was a hindrance. "Yes, it's about her." He didn't say a thing so I choose to continue talking about her. "...I have to protect her from Clyde and from me. But I can't let go of her. She's my life." I heard Keigan's sigh. "Think of this Kuya. Can you stand to see a gun pointed at her head or can you stand to see that she's hurt because you saved her." I shook my head. Actually there's no difference. Hurting her so bad is like killing her and me. Hitting to birds in one stone but the idea of her having a lifeless body is more horrible. "I can't do both." I answered and a few tears drop from my eyes. "...but I would rather hurt her than let her die because of me." "You don't have to feel bad about it. You really have to sacriï¬ce . You can't protect both Jay-jay and us at the same time. You can't do it because you don't have your inheritance yet." He said in a ery calm voice. "...But look on the bright side. It's only temporary, sooner you can have your money. You can protect her and never loose her again. You will have all the time in the world to win her back." I'm hopeless. I will never win her back. Once I let her go, Yuri or David will take advantage of that. They will do everything to have Jay-jay for themselves . And I will loose her forever. "I hate my life." I said and wiped my tears. Keigan laughed. "You wouldn't hate our lives." And I laugh with him. We're sitting on the floor, resting our backs on the back of the couch and laughing together are bringing back memories. It's a wave of nostalgia. I really wished we had a normal family. A lovely Mom that's still alive. A supportive Dad that puts the family ï¬rst. And the three of us, Me Keigan and Keiren. "I think we should go to bed. Especially you." Keigan said and I couldn't disagree. "...You look so stressed." "I am indeed." He stood up ï¬rst and I followed. I put the bottle I was holding in the Mini Bar back before walking out. We're both in silence while walking together to our own bed rooms. I stop in front of Keiren's room door. "Go ahead. I'll just check Keiren." He nodded and walked ï¬rst. I slowly opened the door to Keiren's room. His favorite mushroom lamp is on. It helps him calm every time he's having trouble sleeping. I slowly walk toward him. I picked up his blanket that had fallen to the floor because of his mischief in bed. I held it out to him. Sorry Keiren, sorry if you didn't experience having parents. I'm trying to be your Mom and Dad but I know it's not enough. I hope you can be strong even without them. I hope you don't lose conï¬dence in yourself. I hope you can be strong, more than me or Keigan. I hope you don't end up like me. I kissed her forehead before leaving her room. I slowly closed the door and walked to my room. I felt exhausted. I unbuttoned my uniform one by one. When I got to my room, I took off my shirt. Just as I was about to throw myself on the bed, a wallet-sized picture fell out. I lost track of it... I picked it up and looked at it. Unlike before, I didn't smile when I saw her face. "Jay-jay..." I said and sat at the edge of my bed. "...I know there's a chance that you will never forgive me but I assure you, I will do anything to become stronger." I put her picture down on my bedside table. "...and when I do, I will protect you no matter what." As of now, let me save you from my relatives and.....from me. For now, my focus will be on my siblings. They need me too. I spent most of the night thinking about what could happen. I couldn't get dressed and just fell asleep on my own. I still smelled of alcohol that I was sure had stuck to my bed. I woke up because of a knock on my bedroom door. Headaches again are kicking in. I forced myself to get up even though my body didn't want to leave the bed. "Kuya! Wake up!" It was Keiren knocking at my door. " Kuya Keigan and I might be late!" "Okay! I'm up!" I shouted. He stopped knocking. I washed my face with my hand. I was dizzy and felt like my brain would explode with every movement I made. I forced myself to get up and when I stood up, I almost fell. I had to take Keigan and Keiren to school. And I also had to ace Jay-jay. It has to be today... I was planning to skip it for a few more days. I didn't want to hurt him one after another but that's what was needed. I didn't want to take it any longer because I might not be able to bear it and I wouldn't be able to do what I planned. I went straight to the bathroom and took a shower. I didn't take long and got dressed right away. I look at myself in the mirror. My eyes are lifeless and cold. After getting dressed, I went straight to the Dining where my siblings were eating breakfast. Keigan looks good today. Like he never cried yesterday. His actions were normal as I see him as natural. "Eat breakfast." I heard someone's order. I looked at him and raised my eyebrows. "Why are you here again ?" I asked irritated. "There's no breakfast at home, I'm going to eat." Honey answered. I rolled my eyes. She was already making my house a hangout. Then she would say that her Uncle was scolding her because of her frequent isits here. "What's with your look? You look like a troubled, grumpy young man left by his wife." She said before swallowing her food. "Just eat if you don't want to never be able to eat here again." She just shrugged and continued. I took a glass of coffee and drank it. I really don't feel like eating. I didn't realize how hungry I was because of the weight of my feelings. Keigan and Keiren ï¬nished eating ï¬rst. I asked them to wait for me outside. When I was sure they were gone, I approached Honey. "Where is Keigan's Maid? Kate." I asked. She suddenly stopped eating and looked at me with so much confusion. "She left. Just last night." My forehead creased. "What?" "Your Butler said she left." "But why?" "Don't know." I turned my back on her and let her continue eating. Why would she leave? I don't know how many of Keigan's Maids have left my house. When I got to the garage, I saw Keiren standing next to my car. Keigan was standing silently while reading a book. He was still adjusting the mirror before turning the page with his hand. I chose to ignore the Maid's departure. I'll understand them next time. I unlock my car and ask them to get in. "I will put my seatbelt." Keiren said before I could touch him. "You said so." I let him do it and get in at the driver's seat. I started the car and drove them both away. The two schools are different. Keigan's school is focusing more on academics than other activities, such as sports. The school he chose is right for him because he's smart. In fact, he and Ci-N are the same. When they drove them, I didn't want to go straight to school. I did n't want to drive and I just wanted the car to crash into the pot. This is a punishment for me and it will also be a punishment for Jay-jay. But I have to follow my plan. I have to save her. When I got to school, I parked the car and got out. There were only a few students entering because it was still early. As I walked closer to our room, it felt like I was walking closer to my death. Every step I took was heavy. I wanted this day to be over. When I got to the room, Eman and Josh were already inside. Rory and Edrix were also with them. They both fell silent when I entered. I went straight to my seat and reluctantly sat down. Not long after, Drew entered the door followed by Blaster. They looked at me for a moment and avoided me as if I was sick. I waited a few more moments before the rest of them arrived. Most of them avoided me and as if they didn't want to be with me anymore. "Oh! It's really different when your face is thick!" Mayo whispered before sitting down in her seat. "You can just be quiet." Kit said. Some parts of her face were still swollen. All I know is that she almost went into a coma, but it's good that she woke up quickly. I just don't know why the hospital released her. I don't know how to apologize to her. "You're so early today." Yuri said before sitting down. "... did something happen?" I just looked at her for a moment before turning my gaze back to the door. I'm waiting for her to come inside. I saw Ci-N approaching me. I immediately motioned for her to stop. "Stay right there." "K-keifer... This is about Jay-jay." I arched a brow. "And so?" I could feel our classmates listening. I also knew they didn't like my answer. "What the hell is wrong with you? Keifer." Yuri asked with an irritated sound. "Nothing is wrong with me. But there is something wrong with you." I heard a few of them chuckled in disbelief. "Listen ï¬rst Keifer." Ci-N looked worried. "...K- Jay-jay had an accident yesterday. That's why he's in such a bad mood ." I knew it already. Angelo told me and showed me a CCTV footage from a crossing. "Who cares." I answered sounding not really cared. But I do. We are currently looking for the people on the motorbikes. I already have a clue who they are. Conï¬rmation is all I need and I will hunt them down. "Who cares? Is your head broken, Keifer?" David asked angrily. "...Aren't you at least a little bit guilty about what you did?" I didn't answer him and just stared at them. They looked at each other and seemed to be wondering if they were thinking the same thing about me. "It looks like this." Felix said and all of them looked at him. "...You already did your plan yesterday. Right?" "Keifer..." "What about Jay-jay?" "I thought we stopped it?" They all reacted almost simultaneously. They couldn't accept what Felix said. This is it. This is the only way I could think of. I didn't want it but this is the most effective way. I knew Jay-jay would be angry with them too, but unlike me there was a chance he would forgive them. My original plan was completely different. I was planning to involve a woman but knowing Jay-jay, he might just beat her up. "You already did your plan. What do you plan on Jay-jay?" Eman said. "Let's just say that Keifer was just angry. Let's not say what we did." It was Blaster look so worried. "Jay-jay will be angry with us." Ci-N said almost about to cry. "I don't understand what you're doing." Yuri said "Tell us. No more, that's where this conversation is going ." Eren sounds irritated. "We can't do that!" Kit said. "Tell us the truth!" David also shouted. "Don't order Keifer!" Rory shouts at David. "...He'll tell us too. It just takes the right time." "I feel sorry for Jay-jay." Ci-N said while looking down. "He already told us to stop that plan!" Eman said, he's obviously mad. "You're acting like it! You were one of the leaders of that crazy plan!" Denzel snapped. Now they're pointing their ï¬ngers at each other. Blame it on each other but there's only one person to blame here. But me. "Just say it properly and then we'll apologize." Blaster suggested. "It seems like it's that easy, huh?" Drew said sarcastically. "Jay-jay will never forgive us." Yuri said. "We will drink him." It was Rory. "It's not that easy." Edrix answered. They keep suggesting things to do and blaming each other. But one thing is for sure. They want me to tell the truth. They want me to tell her. But all the collisions stopped when she stepped her foot inside our classroom. My heart beats so fast. "J-jay-jay...." They almost whispered. "W-what's true? What's the plan?" And at that moment, I know we're both going to have a broken heart.