Chapter-268

For those who doesn't get the set up of Keifer's POV .

This is the time he broke Jay-jay's heart.

His explanation and his true attitude.

Added Pain

Keifer's POV

I'm going crazy. I don't
know if I can hold on like this. "Seriously? Are you planning to use up all the alcohol in your Mini bar?" I didn't
bother myself to look. I know it's Honey. "You don't care if I use it up. I have a lot to buy." I said and took a sip
rom my glass. This is the only way I can hold on to what I did. I feel like every time I don't talk to her, my heart
is being pulled out of my body. I need to numb out. "Whatever. Your girlfriend hasn't been to school for two
days. And she still doesn't seem to be planning on going to school today." I knew this might have happened.
It's my fault. She seems to have lost the will to study because of what happened. Even our classmates have
lost the will to answer my calls. Rory is the first person I tried to call but he's not answering his phone. I did the
same to the others but they all hang up or don't answer my calls. Yuri and Ci-N are the only ones who
answered my call but they only said one thing. They keep asking what my problem is. I can't answer them so I
just hang up the call. "What are you planning? Are you going back to London?" Honey asked me. I shook my
head. "Not yet." I'm not yet strong enough. I haven't even fixed my anger management issue. That's what I
should fix first before the others. But with so many problems going on with me now, I'm confused about what
to prioritize. "Hey Keifer... I'm the one struggling with what you're doing." "You don't have to stay here if you
can't stand seeing me like this." She laughed slightly, causing me to look at her. She's starting to annoy me.
"You said you will be strong enough to protect your family and your loved one. But here you are looking more
miserable than your girl." He arched a brow. "...now tell me how this drunk man in front of me can save his
amily and love ones." I dropped the glass I was holding. She's right. Sometimes what this woman was saying
made sense. I thought she was just acting and being mean. How could I fight and protect Jay-jay and my
siblings if I looked miserable. I chuckled in disbelief. I could have shooed her away to get myself together and
to make sure she was safe. I had things to do instead of just sitting here and drinking. "You're talking to me
with sense, right?" I said and drank the remaining alcohol from my glass. "We've been together for a long time
but you're only realizing it now?" I dropped the glass and stood up. I faced her and smiled slightly. "I realized a
long time ago that you have no brains." I immediately passed her after saying that. I knew she would get angry
and would just talk to me. After leaving the bar, I immediately looked for a maid. Most of them are avoiding
me. They know that I don't like to have many people around me. What's worse is that I don't know their names.
I only know the Head Housemaid and the Butler. I don't want to call them names because they are both old.
They should rest. Once I turn 18 I will get the whole custody of Keiren and Keigan from them so they can
finally have their retirement vacation. I named the fake last will I made to them to get custody of my siblings
rom my Monster Father. I am very grateful to them. I just kept searching, until I saw one of them vacuuming
the carpeted floor. "Hey..." I called her. She shut down the vacuum and looked at me. "Sir?" "Can I ask you a
avor? Get me something to eat. I want everything to be ready by the time I take a shower." She nodded. "Yes,
Sir. I'll take care of it." I kicked her and walked towards my room. I took a shower to wash away the effects of
too much alcohol on my body. I probably drank enough to numb the pain. I quickly got dressed afterwards. I
also grabbed my hoodie. I was planning to go jogging after eating. I considered it as a warm up for my day. I
went to the Dining where the food was ready. The Maid was currently pouring juice into a glass when I sat
down. "Eat now, Sir." The Maid said. "Thank youâ€"hmm... what is your name?" I asked. I only now remembered
that I didn't know her name. "Cass Sandra Eugenio. Choose Cass or Sandra." She smiled at me. I force a smile.
"Sandra will do. Again, thank you for this." "Welcome, Sir." She has this jolly attitude and I can't help
remembering Jay-jay. I hope I see her happy again. Because of what I did, it might never happen again . I
chose not to think about it for now. I can't continue if I always focus on 'what if'. I have to stop imagining
things about our situation. It's clearly not helping my mind to keep up. I force myself to eat. My stomach really
doesn't want to accept food. I guess this is the result of my drinking for a few days. After eating, I stood up
and put on my hoodie. I also put on my headset and put my phone in my pocket. I was out of my mind as I
walked out of the house. I even looked up at the sky. It feels like I haven't been outside for a long time, even
though it's only been two days since I last went out. I'm getting weirder everyday. I did what I planned to do,
jogging. I keep running at a slow pace while trying to pick up my thoughts. It works because somehow I can
think of things to do. When I got to the park, I stopped. It turned out I was already far away from home. I
probably didn't notice because I was so deep in thought. I choose to rest for a while. I sat down on a bench
first. I took my phone out of my pocket and checked for any messages. There is one from Honey but it's not
that important. I just decided to go back to jogging. I'm about to leave when I saw someone wearing an HVIS
uniform. My heart beat so fast. I can't see her face yet but I already know who she is. Dammit Jay-jay! I badly
want to see you but I'm afraid that I will not let you go once I hold your hand. I feel like I will eat all the patience
I have made. I can't do my plan. I need to control myself every time she's around like this. I haven't even
started a plan but everything is about to fall apart. I put my headset back on and adjusted my hoodie. I was
jogging out of the park. I was so angry and didn't see her. Even though it was true, my feet didn't seem to want
to step. It didn't take long before I felt someone following me. I already have a clue on who it was. Don't follow
me! Please... If she doesn't stop, I might not be able to stop her anymore. Everything will be ruined. I
quickened my jogging pace so that he wouldn't notice. But he was still following or rather, they should have
been told. I finally noticed that I was close to home. I had no choice but to confront them. I stopped and
caught my breath. I also took off my headset and put it in my pocket. "Next time you'll follow me make sure I
don't notice you." I said without looking at them. I didn't hear any answer from them. I wanted to leave and
continue walking. I didn't want to confront him. I was scared. But if I don't confront him now, maybe the next
time we meet I won't be able to control myself. I slowly turned around and faced them. And that's when I
realized that what I was doing was really hard to stand up for. My feelings that I had numbed with alcohol
softened again when I saw him. My Jay-jay... "What do you want?" I asked them. "W-what..." She started and I
almost ran to hug her. "Y-because... M-may â€"." He hadn't finished what he was saying when Percy suddenly
walked up and continued to enter my house. My jaw dropped in amused. "Hey!" I shouted and followed him.
This guy was fine. Not because we were friends before he had the right to do whatever he wanted to do.
Especially entering someone else's house. My house to be exact. He didn't think I could sue him for
trespassing for what he did. "I'm going to CR!" He replied and quickly ran into the house. I stopped in the
garage. I washed my face in annoyance with Percy. Why didn't he leave the thick face in the hole? Why does
he have to carry that until now? I can feel Jay-jay's presence not too far away from me. Percy had stolen my
attention so we didn't finish the conversation. But I also didn't plan to finish it. I need to think of another plan. I
have to stick with my first plan which is pushing Jay- jay away from me. It's the only way to save her from me
and my stupid cousin Clyde. But I have nothing after that. "When your stepbrother leaves, go away." I said
calmly and about to walk away. "Keifer!" She called me. My knee almost melt hearing her shouting my name.
"...I-I just want to know." Why do I have this feeling? My instinct is telling me to stay and listen but my mind is
shouting at me telling me to turn my back and leave. Without any hesitation, I choose to stay. I don't exactly
know why. Maybe because I want to stare at her for a while. Maybe because I miss her too much I want to
enjoy the little moment that we have. "What is it?" "I-I just want to know..." She took a deep breath. "...despite
what you did. D-did you love me?" FVCK, I DO! And not just loved because I love you so much! I wanted to
shout that and hug her. I really wanted to but I couldn't do it. Everything I've started will be ruined and I'll start
over from scratch. If I do that too, I know she'll find a way to help me. I don't want to hurt her. I laugh bitterly. I
know I'm about to give both of us another pain. I can't stand to see you hurt anymore but I have no choice. She
bite her lower lips. I saw her shaking a bit. Maybe she's scared to hear my answer. I'm debating whether to
continue but if I don't do this. How will she stop? Maybe she'll just keep asking me how I feel. And then, I'll be
orced to tell the truth. Damn this what ifs and possibilities! "You followed me to ask that?" I force a laugh. "...i
can't believe this." I shook my head while smiling like a lunatic. I don't know if I'm good with acting but I'm
trying my best. "Let me guess... Did you expect that I might have feelings for you while I was fooling you?" I
know it's a yes. Don't worry Jay, you're right. I had feelings for you before I knew it. The next thing I know I'm
ooling myself and not you. I keep denying things between my feelings and my revenge. I try to make it seem
impossible even though it really happened. I almost laugh with my own stupidity. I face Jay-jay and look at
her. I can already see pain. "What a damn!" I added and laughed. "...This is not a tv series or movie. Falling for
you or realizing that I love you in the middle of my revenge will never happen." She gasps a bit. I know I'm
hurting her so bad. This is another reason to hate me. "That's how I act. I made you believe me!" I still smile
and laugh. I walk slowly toward her. She seems uncomfortable. I'm sorry Jay-jay. I'm sorry for what I'm about
to say and to do! "So you don't have to worry, let me explain it to you." I stop in front of her. "...I will never fall
or you. You are just a stupid-little-shit to me just like your brother Aries." Her tears started to fall. She even
tries to stop it but obviously failed. Seeing her like this are breaking me into pieces. I want to slap myself. I'm
holding back too much. You're a fvcking evil Keifer! I can't believe I'm putting up with her like this. But I have to
continue. I smirked at her. "If you had just given up on me on New Year's Eve, you probably would have found
out the truth sooner. If you had just given up on yourself, the plan would have been complete." I cross my arm
and look at her from head to toe. "...It's a shame that half of Section E would have won the bet." Fvck! I slipped
up! I shouldn't have mentioned that. I was just adding to her resentment towards our friends. She should have
gone to them when I left. What now? She was shocked from what she heard. She clearly still didn't know.
Right! The bet! I smile widely. "Come to think of it... The bet isn't over yet." I hug her from her waste. "...Why
can't we continue what was interrupted at New Year?" Being close to her like this makes me want to kiss her. I
badly want to taste her lips but not like this.Every time I kiss her before I make sure she feels my love for her.
But now, she has to feel the pain. I held her by the jaw. She was wincing in pain. "B-let me go." She begs. Just
kill me after this! "I know you want it." I crashed my lips to her. It's a deep kiss that makes her feel disrespect.
The kind of kiss that shows my dominance. I can feel her tears running down through her cheeks. I want to
stop but I can't. Stop me please... And she did. It's like she heard my mind. She pushed me with all her might. I
got away from her but what I didn't expect was what she did next . She punched my jaw. I immediately felt
dizzy and couldn't stop myself from falling. I hadn't recovered when I felt her on top of me and then she
punched me again. She continued to punch me while her tears continued to fall . I deserve this. I deserve
every punch from her. Keep punching me if that will help you ease the pain. Every punch I receive from him
hurts but I choose to
I can't stop. I'm starting to feel the blood from my nose and taste it
rom my mouth. I thought she was really going to crush my face but
she stopped.
She stopped and looked at me. For some reason she cries again but this time
with so much pain.
I also couldn't take my eyes off her. I couldn't take my eyes off her even though
I could clearly see how she was crushing in pain. I wanted to touch
her cheek and wipe her tears. I wanted to apologize and
take back everything I said. I wanted to hug her tightly. It was so
tight and I couldn't let her go.
But I couldn't...
I couldn't stop the lump in my throat. I broke down
every time I thought about our situation. She needed to be gone.
She needed to be hurt. She needed... She needed...
I couldn't hold back my tears anymore especially when I saw her staring
at me. It was like she was really making me feel the pain she was carrying.
You have to do that... I know what exactly you feel.
She suddenly left from the surface. I slowly
sat up. My face was wet with blood and tears. And now
my tears were mixing with it.
I wiped my face using my hand. I don't want her to see me suffer.
She shouldn't know.
She looked at me with hate, knowing that I was in pain. I was also
in pain and I hope I can take it like you are, Jay-
jay.
She started to walk away from me but she stopped before she reached the
house gate.
"You put it on the rock, even on your forehead and on the dog's ass!
Karma will come back to you! You're welcome!" She sighed heavily. "...And when
that happens! I'll be the first to laugh right at your face!"
She immediately ran out. I wanted to laugh because of what
she said. Karma has been coming back to me for a long time.
And it was good karma.
"Jay-jay!" It was Percy. "What did you do Keifer?"
I looked at him threateningly. "Protect Jay-jay.
If anything bad happens to him. I will kill you and it will be
or real."
He didn't answer and quickly followed Jay-jay. I just really hoped that
Percy would protect him.
I must have been sitting there for a few minutes, acting stupid. I kept replaying
what had happened.
I fvcking don't understand. Why did this have to happen to us.
Why did I have to suffer. Why did I have to
hurt her. Why...
Why can't we be normal students?
I held my face as tears started to fall
. I felt like I couldn't take it anymore. I was struggling so much. I wanted to
take back what I said and did.
I DON'T WANT IT ANYMORE! I can't live without Jay-jay in
my life. I need him.
I forced myself to stand up even though my face and head were covered in pain.
"Keifer! What happened?" Honey shouted as she ran towards
me.
"I have to follow Jay-jay. I have to talk to her." I said while trying my
best to walk.
Honey stop me and help me to stand up.
"You need to get your wounds treated! Who hurt
you?"
He tried to bring me inside the house but my body was walking the
opposite side.
"Jay-jay... I-I can't lose him!"
"Can you hear yourself? I thought you'd fix the
situation first?"
I no longer care about my situation. Jay-jay is the only thing that matters
to me.
"Jay-jay... Jayâ€"."
I couldn't finish what I was going to say because
my vision was completely covered in darkness.