The Man I Love

Freydis Bloodaxe's POV

The Man I Love

It felt as though a volcano had erupted in my chest, the heat of it searing through me as I paced back and forth in my chamber, wondering if my son, Thorstein, and Ragnar's daughter had reached him in time to stop him from killing Rolo.

My husband, Harald, assumed I was worried about his daughter, my friend, just as he was. Don't get me wrong, I am worried about Astrid, but let's be realistic: everyone knows Ragnar would never kill her, no matter how furious he might be. He will only punish her, and no matter how severe the punishment, it will never result in her death. But Rolo? He would surely be killed if no help arrived in time.

When the news finally reached me that they were back, I sighed in relief. My prayers had been answered. They were all back and alive, though Rolo was severely battered. So I heard, but I had yet to see him. I longed to, to assess the extent of his injuries and see if there was any way I might help.

Ser Rolo Irk was thrown into the dungeons immediately upon their return to the pack, and it shattered me. Yet, I reminded myself that imprisonment was better than death. I rushed to Astrid's quarters, where she lay weak and very ill, surrounded by those tending to her, trying to restore her strength.

It was the mark—I doubted Ragnar would be careless enough to lay hands on her. I sat with her, watching as she was cared for, waiting for her to regain consciousness. As soon as Astrid could stand, feverish though she was, she insisted on helping me reach Ser Rolo. We navigated the secret passages with ease to avoid the guards at her door, but persuading the royal guards in the dungeons would be a real challenge.

Ser Harrold himself was there. The sight of him standing guard made it clear that this might be a mission impossible. We tried to evade his ever-watchful eyes, but it was no use; he had already seen us. And when he did, he ordered us to turn back.

But we couldn't leave, not when we were already at the dungeon gate. Astrid's guilt was plain to see, and she wanted to make it up to me. "Please, Ser Harrold, he's injured because of me. We just want to tend to his wounds," Astrid pleaded, meeting his gaze. I had no idea where she found the courage to look him in the eye; it was a trait rarely found among omegas like us. Sometimes I envied her for it; other times, I did not—her defiant nature often got her into trouble.

"He got what he deserved," Ser Harrold replied curtly. "He dared deceive me, the commander of the royal guard, and kidnap the king's daughter and the soon-to-be king's wife," he said, leveling accusations against Ser Rolo, even with the supposed abductee standing before him.

"But he didn't kidnap me; I asked him to take me away," Astrid explained, holding his gaze.

"You are an ordinary omega. He is under no obligation to obey you," Ser Harrold responded harshly, and I saw Astrid's eyes glisten. I tugged at her hand, begging her not to respond. I couldn't trust what she might say, but her voice trembled as she spoke.

"I know my place; I am just an ordinary omega. I have no say, not even over my very own life," she said, tears burning in her eyes but refusing to fall. "I am just a prize for any man, but I beg you, sir, please let me pass to tend to a friend's wounds. That's all I ask, Ser Harrold," she implored, still holding his gaze.

"Princess," Ser Harrold said, conflicted. That rebellious, stubborn look always moved him. He had admired her rebellious spirit since she was a child, always finding amusement in her antics. Seeing a little omega who would never accept her place was very endearing; he always loved to see her that way. But now, that attitude that was once cute only brought trouble. She was now a grown woman, and those behaviors had become irritating.

"Please," she begged, touching his arm, and he sighed.

"Just a few minutes. Stay any longer and you will be dragged out," he said, finally permitting us. As soon as he granted us passage, Astrid ran to Ser Rolo, and I curtsied to Ser Harrold, but he sighed again.

"My lady, you may be the queen, but you are also an omega," he reminded me, trying to make me understand my place.

"I-I'm sorry," I said, bowing again, making Ser Harrold roll his eyes. "How are you two friends? One rebellious omega and one overly obedient? It makes no sense, yet you seem to get along," he muttered as I left.

Astrid and I found Ser Rolo shivering with cold in the dungeons, and I rushed to cradle his head in my lap.

"No, my queen, you shouldn't be here. This is not a place for someone like you," he whispered, barely awake from exhaustion and injury.

"You're very hurt, Ser Rolo," I sobbed, caressing the face of the man I loved. "Let us tend to your wounds," I begged as Astrid brought out medicinal herbs and began to treat him.

"I'm so sorry, this is my fault," Astrid said, looking at him. He smiled despite his pain.

"It's not your fault," he reassured her, but she still felt the weight of guilt. "It's my duty to protect you; I am your sworn guard, or was, as I might soon die," Rolo Irk said, as Astrid continued cleaning his wounds while I held him steady.

Once we had tended to his injuries, Astrid stepped aside to allow me some time alone with him.

"Everything will be alright. You won't die. I'll do all I can to see to that," I said, caressing his face, though I knew there was little I could do.

"It is all fine already," he lied, falling asleep in my lap from sheer exhaustion.

As we sat there, none of us knew that both Prince Ragnar and my husband, the king, stood by the gate, watching us.