Chapter 4

My dear reader,

Have you ever woken up and immediately known— Today is going to be absolute bullshit?

Because I have.

And the moment I open my eyes, I know something is wrong.

The room is too warm. The blankets are heavier than usual. There's a strange, steady rhythm near me— Breathing.

I turn my head.

And there he is. Neil Fucking Varian.

Sleeping peacefully in my bed.

What The Actual Fuck.

I have woken up to many strange situations in my life.

Waking up in a bathtub? Normal.

Waking up in a stairwell? Happens.

Waking up on a rooftop with a half-eaten sandwich in my hand? Don't ask.

But waking up to Neil Varian, comfortably sleeping next to me?

Unacceptable.

I stare at him. Really stare.

The early morning light filters through my curtains, casting a faint glow on his face. His expression is relaxed, his breathing even. His lips—soft. His eyelashes—long. Unfairly long.

He looks—peaceful.

Like he belongs here.

Like he does this often.

And that thought? Makes my skin crawl.

I move slowly. Carefully.

Because if this motherfucker wakes up and says something weird like "Good morning, darling," I am going to actually commit murder.

I shift. Pull the blanket away.

And then—

"Leaving already?"

FUCK.

Neil doesn't open his eyes immediately. Just smirks, like he's having fun with this.

I force my breathing to stay calm. "What the fuck are you doing here?"

His eyes finally open, sharp and knowing.

"Sleeping," he says simply.

Like it's the most natural thing in the world.

I hate that he's unbothered.

I sit up, rubbing my face aggressively.

Okay. Let's think.

Did I let him in? Maybe.

Did I invite him? Fuck probably.

Did he sneak in like a cryptid? Most likely.

I side-eye him.

Neil is still watching me, head tilted slightly, like he's trying to read my thoughts.

"So?" I press. "What the fuck are you doing here?"

He stretches, completely at ease, like he owns the place.

"You looked like you needed company."

My brain short-circuits.

I. What. Excuse me.

I let out a slow breath. Don't react, Charssein. That's what he wants.

Instead, I stand up.

"Get out."

Neil sighs dramatically, as if I'm the one being unreasonable.

But—he listens.

He slides out of bed, stretches like a fucking cat, then casually walks toward the window.

Because of course. That's how he got in.

Before he climbs out, he glances at me.

"Don't miss me too much, Charssein."

And then—he's gone.

I Am Losing My Mind.

I stare at the empty window.

The cold air seeps in, but the blankets still hold warmth. I settle back, running my fingers through my hair.

I should be freaking out more.

I should be calling security or throwing things or burning this entire place down.

But instead?

I just stare at the spot where Neil was.

And for some reason— It feels colder now.

But Guess What? The Day Gets Worse.

I barely get ten minutes to process before my door swings open.

A servant stands there, stiff and formal.

"Your father is waiting for you in the car, young master."

I exhale sharply.

Right. That bullshit.

I grab my phone.

I am not going to that fucking flight.

But if I want to escape? I need to do it smartly.

I head to his office first, and on his stupidly expensive desk, I leave a beautifully written note.

"Fuck off."

Neat. Precise. Straight to the point.

And then? Obviously, I climb out the window just like how that asshole did.

---

By the time I reach the university, I've almost convinced myself that Neil sneaking into my bed was a fever dream.

Well… almost.

The hallways are loud. Crowded. Voices blend together in an endless murmur of bullshit I don't care about.

I light a cigarette the moment I step outside.

The air here smells like damp books, spilled coffee, and fake intellectualism.

God, I hate it.

Under the stone archway, my so-called "friends" are loitering like stray dogs.

"Charssein!" Migs grins. "Spare some cash?"

I roll my eyes but hand over a few bills I snatched from my father's drawer.

Because that's why they keep me around, right?

Not for friendship.

Not for connection.

Just money.

"Bro is literally our walking ATM," Kenji sighs, pocketing his share.

"Yeah, and y'all still insist on asking," Cel snickers. "Like, at least pretend to be subtle. Slip a donation box in his bag or something."

"Right?" Migs sighs dramatically. "We need a 'Charssein Pity Fund' for his mental illness and financial generosity."

I take a slow drag from my cigarette. "You're all fucking parasites."

"And yet," Cel grins, "you keep feeding us."

I flip him off.

Cel just grabs my wrist.

And instantly, the mood shifts.

His grin flickers as he eyes the fresh bandages.

"Ayo," he whistles. "Wrist game crazy."

Migs leans in. "Deadass. You beefing with life and losing?"

"Must be nice," Kenji hums, sipping his coffee. "Some of us gotta suffer without the fruit ninja skills"

Reid, who has been silent this whole time, suddenly punches me in the arm.

"Ow— What the fuck?" I scowl.

"You're fucking dumb," he mutters.

And before I can react—

SLAP. Cel just smacks the back of my head.

"Stupid asshole" he says casually.

Kenji clicks his tongue. "Real talk, how are you rich and still depressed?"

"Skill issue," Migs adds.

I exhale slowly, rubbing my temple.

"You dumbasses," I say. "If I was actually suicidal, this wouldn't be helping."

Cel shrugs. "Then we'll just roast you back to life."

Reid crosses his arms. "If you actually tried to die, I'd personally drag your ass back just to kill you myself."

Kenji sips his coffee. "We'd take turns."

Migs grins. "I'd record it."

"Fuck all of you."

"Yeah, yeah," Cel smirks. "Love you too, wristband Barbie."

I groan.

"You're all insufferable," I mutter. "A burden. A plague upon this world."

"And yet, here you are," Kenji says. "With us."

Migs grins. "So… who's really the dumbass?"

I take a long sip of my coffee.

"I hope all of you choke."

Just as I think I can escape this bullshit conversation—

"Hey, speaking of choking on bad decisions," Kenji suddenly says. "Did y'all hear about the new kid?"

I pause.

Reid raises an eyebrow. "You mean the Literature weirdo?"

"Oh—Neil or something?" Cel chimes in.

I sip my coffee. "Never heard of him."

Reid scoffs. "Liar."

I blink. "Excuse me?"

"You literally met him yesterday," Reid deadpans. "And last week. And the week before that. He's in your class."

That asshole.

---

TO BE CONTINUED...